JokoJokes

Skinny Dip Jokes

38 skinny dip jokes and hilarious skinny dip puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about skinny dip that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Quick Jump To

Funniest Skinny Dip Short Jokes

Short skinny dip jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The skinny dip humour may include short skinny jokes also.

  1. Skinny dipping involves a swimming pool. Fat dipping involves a ranch cup and chicken nuggets.
  2. Finally got up enough courage to skinny dip... ...just can't attend the Baptist church any more.
  3. What did the Englishman say to the Frenchman that was skinny-dipping in a river? Are you in Seine?
  4. A couple decided to go skinny dipping in Paris during a cold winter night. Everyone called them in Seine.
  5. I've stopped going skinny dipping since I put on a little weight Now I've started chunky dunking.
  6. What did god say when Eve went skinny dipping for the first time? d**..., i will never get that scent out of my fish.
  7. What did god say when Eve went skinny dipping? d**..., i'm never getting that smell out of the fish.
  8. A group of men from San Francisco were skinny dipping... When a c**... floated to the surface
    "okay guys, who f**...?
  9. I was walking on the beach when I stumbled on an elderly couple skinny dipping "At least they have a good s**... life" I thought to myself once the husband turned round

Share These Skinny Dip Jokes With Friends




Skinny Dip One Liners

Which skinny dip one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with skinny dip? I can suggest the ones about dipping and skinny girl.

  1. If an obese person goes skinny dipping, It really isn't.
  2. Why can't elephants go skinny dipping? They can't get their trunks off...

Skinny Dip Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.

What funny jokes about skinny dip you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean skinny jeans jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make skinny dip pranks.

An elderly man in Saskatchewan.

An elderly man in Saskatchewan had owned a large farm for several years. He had a large pond in the back, fixed up nice; picnic tables, horseshoe courts, and some apple and peach trees. The pond was properly shaped and fixed up for swimming. One evening the old farmer decided to go down to the pond, as he hadn't been there for a while, and look it over. He grabbed a five gallon bucket to bring back some fruit. As he neared the pond, he heard voices shouting and laughing with glee. As he came closer he saw it was a bunch of young women skinny-dipping in his pond. He made the women aware of his presence and they all went to the deep end. One of the women shouted to him, "We're not coming out until you leave!" The old man frowned, "I didn't come down here to watch you ladies swim n**..., or make you get out of the pond n**...." Holding the bucket up he said, "I'm here to feed the alligator."

A priest, a minister, and a rabbi decided to go skinny dipping...

Suddenly, they saw three women walking towards them. Each was a member of their flocks. The priest and the minister covered their privates with their hands and closed their eyes waiting for the agony to end.
After the women walked away they noticed the rabbi had covered his face and not his nether regions. He said, "My flock recognizes my face. What kinda sermons do you give?"

The Watering Hole

An elderly man in Louisiana had owned a large farm for several years.
He had a large pond in the back. It was properly shaped for swimming, so he fixed it up nice with picnic tables, horseshoe courts, and some apple and peach trees.
One evening the old farmer decided to go down to the pond, as he hadn't been there for a while, and look it over.
He grabbed a five-gallon bucket to bring back some fruit.
As he neared the pond, he heard voices shouting and laughing with glee.
As he came closer, he saw it was a bunch of young women skinny-dipping in his pond.
He made the women aware of his presence and they all went to the deep end.
One of the women shouted to him, 'we're not coming out until you leave!'
The old man frowned, 'I didn't come down here to watch you ladies swim n**... or make you get out of the pond n**....'
Holding the bucket up he said,
'I'm here to feed the alligator...'

A priest, a rabbi, and a minister...

Are skinny dipping in the forest one day. Joking and talking philosophy and such. Suddenly they hear a large group of locals walking down the path toward them. To their dismay, they realized that they left their clothes hanging on branches on the other side of the path and would have to run past everyone to get them.
The minister gets out of the water, covers his junk and runs as fast as he can past the oncoming people to get his clothes.
The priest, in turn, gets out of the water, covers his junk and runs as fast as he can past the people to his clothes.
Finally the rabbi gets out of the water, covers his face and runs as fast as they can to his clothes.
As they dress the priest turns to the rabbi and asks,
"Why did you cover your face and not your g**...?"
"Well I don't know about you guys, but in my congregation they know me by my face."

Fast thinking old man


The old farmer had a large pond in the back, fixed up nicely with picnic tables, a barbecue pit, horseshoe courts, and some apple and peach trees. The pond was properly shaped and fixed up for swimming when it was built.
One evening, the old guy decided to go down to the pond and look it over. He hadn't been there for a while. He grabbed a five gallon bucket to bring back some fruit.
As he neared the pond, he heard voices shouting and laughing with glee. As he came closer, he saw it was a bunch of young women skinny dipping in his pond. As he approached, he made the women aware of his presence.
At once, they all went to the deep end.
One of the women shouted to him, "We're not coming out until you leave."
The old man frowned, "I did not come down here to watch you young ladies swim n**..., or to make you get out of the pond n**...."
Holding up the bucket, he said, "I'm here to feed the alligator."
Moral: Old men can still think fast!

The Farmer and The Skinny Dippers

An elderly man in Louisiana had owned a large farm for several years. He had a large pond in the back. It was properly shaped for swimming, so he fixed it up nice with picnic tables, horseshoe courts, and some apple and peach trees. One evening the old farmer decided to go down to the pond, as he hadn't been there for a while, and look it over. He grabbed a five-gallon bucket to bring back some fruit. As he neared the pond, he heard voices shouting and laughing with glee. As he came closer, he saw it was a bunch of young women skinny-dipping in his pond. He made the women aware of his presence and they all went to the deep end. One of the women shouted to him, "We're not coming out until you leave!" The old man frowned, "I didn't come down here to watch you ladies swim n**... or make you get out of the pond n**...." Holding the bucket up he said, "I'm here to feed the alligator…"

Old men think fast

An elderly man in Louisiana had owned a large farm for several years. He had a large pond in the back. It was properly shaped for swimming, so he fixed it up nice with picnic tables, horseshoe courts, and some apple and peach trees.
One evening the old farmer decided to go down to the pond, as he hadn't been there for a while, and look it over. He grabbed a five-gallon bucket to bring back some fruit. As he neared the pond, he heard voices shouting and laughing with glee.
As he came closer, he saw it was a bunch of young women skinny-dipping in his pond. He made the women aware of his presence and they all went to the deep end.
One of the women shouted to him, We're not coming out until you leave!'
The old man frowned, I didn't come down here
to watch you ladies swim n**... or make you
get out of the pond n**....
Holding the bucket up he said, I'm here to feed the alligator…

The old Man's Pond

An elderly man in Louisiana had owned a large farm for several years.

He had a large pond in the back. It was properly shaped for swimming, so he fixed it up nice with picnic tables, horseshoe courts, and some apple and peach trees.

One evening the old farmer decided to go down to the pond, as he hadn't been there for a while, and look it over.

He grabbed a five-gallon bucket to bring back some fruit.

As he neared the pond, he heard voices shouting and laughing with glee.

As he came closer, he saw it was a bunch of young women skinny-dipping in his pond.

He made the women aware of his presence and they all went to the deep end.

One of the women shouted to him, 'we're not coming out until you leave!'

The old man frowned, 'I didn't come down here to watch you ladies swim n**... or make you get out of the pond n**....'

Holding the bucket up he said,
'I'm here to feed the alligator...'

Two women visit a pond...

Two women visit a pond on an old man's property. They figure he won't mind if they use his pond and decide to go skinny dipping. Meanwhile, the old man is headed to the pond with a bucket to pick apples from a tree near the pond. When he reaches the pond he notices clothes on the dock, walks over and picks them up. He then notices the two girls who cover themselves and yell to him. "We're not getting out until you leave, you creeper!". He chuckles to himself and motions to the bucket, "I'm not here to spy on anyone. I'm just here to feed the gators." That day, the old man proved he was still sharp.

Skinny Dipping . . .

An elderly man in Florida had owned a large farm for several years.
He had a large pond in the back.

It was properly shaped for swimming, so he fixed it up nice with picnic tables, horseshoe courts, and some orange, and lime trees.

One evening the old farmer decided to go down to the pond, as he hadn't been there for a while, to check it out.

He grabbed a five-gallon bucket to bring back some fruit.

As he neared the pond, he heard voices shouting and laughing with glee.

As he came closer, he saw it was a bunch of young women skinny-dipping in his pond.

He made the women aware of his presence and they all went to the deep end.

One of the women shouted to him, "we're not coming out until you leave!"

The old man frowned, "I didn't come down here to watch you ladies swim n**... or make you get out of the pond n**... so that I could get a good look at you," holding the bucket up he said, "I'm here to feed the alligator."

A Rabbi and a priest went for a walk..........

While attending a religious convention. They stoped at a lake and decided to go for a swim. Since they did not have a change of clothes both decided they would skinny dip. Just as the last bit of clothing was stripped off a group of people came from the conference, the priest quickly covered his c**... with his hands while the rabbi placed his hands over his face. As the crowd got closer the priest said to the rabbi, "why dont you cover your shame"? The rabbi replied, "I do not know about you but, people recognize me by my face.

Ron, an elderly man in Florida...

Ron, an elderly man in Florida, had owned a large farm with a big pond in the backyard for several years. The pond was properly shaped for swimming, so he fixed it up nicely with picnic tables, horseshoe pits, and citrus trees.
One evening the old farmer decided to go down and check on the swimming hole, because he hadn't been to that area of the property in a while. He grabbed a five-gallon bucket to bring back some fruit. As he neared the pond, he heard voices shouting and laughing with glee.
As he came closer, he saw it was a bunch of young women skinny-dipping in his pond. He made the women aware of his presence, and they all went to the deep end. One of the women shouted to him, "We're not coming out until you leave!"
Ron frowned, "I didn't come down here to watch you ladies swim n**...."
Rob held the bucket up high and said, "I'm here to feed the alligator."

A Rabbi and a Priest were having a picnic

A Rabbi and a Priest were having a picnic on a really hot summer day and wanted to dip in the river to cool off. They had not thought to bring bathing suits, so decided to skinny dip instead.
The river was flowing rapidly and both clergy were washed a short distance downstream before getting out. After climbing out of the river they had just started to make a run for it to get to their clothes, when many members of their congregation came into view.
The Priest covered his privates with his hands and put on a burst of speed, but the Rabbi covered his face instead. "What are you doing?" the Priest asked. "I don't know about you," the Rabbi answered, "but my congregants recognize me by my face."

A Brilliant Old Man and Skinny Dipping Ladies

Ron an elderly man in Florida, had owned a large farm for several years, which had a pond in the back. It was suitable to swimming so he fixed it up nicely with picnic tables, Horseshoe courts, and some orange and lime trees.

One evening the old farmer decided to go down to the pond, as he hadn't been there for a while. He grabbed a five-gallon bucket to bring back some fruit. As he neared the pond, he heard voices shouting and laughing with glee.

When he came closer, he saw it was a bunch of young women skinny-dipping in his pond. He made the women aware of his presence, and they all went to the deep end.

One of the women shouted to him, "We're not coming out until you leave!"

Ron frowned, "I didn't come down here to watch you ladies swim n**... or make you get out of the pond n**...."
Holding the Bucket up Ron said, "I'm here to feed the alligator!"

An elderly man in Florida . . .

An elderly man in Florida had owned a large farm for several years.
He had a large pond in the back, fixed up nice picnic tables, horseshoe
courts, and some orange and grapefruit trees.
The pond was properly shaped and fixed up for swimming when it was built.
One evening the old farmer decided to go down to the pond to look it
over, as he hadn't been there for a while.
He grabbed a five-gallon bucket to bring back some fruit.
As he neared the pond, he heard voices shouting and laughing with glee.
As he came closer he saw it was a bunch of young women skinny-dipping in his pond.
He made the women aware of his presence and they all went to the deep end.
One of the women shouted to him, "We're not coming out until you leave!"
The old man frowned, "I didn't come down here to watch you ladies swim n**... or make you get out of the pond n**...."
Holding the bucket up he said, "I'm here to feed the alligators."

Not Here To Swim...

My uncle Mike owns hundreds of acres of land. In a back corner of that land there is a small lake surrounded by peach trees. One day he decides he'll pick some peaches and relax by the water. So he grabs a peach bucket and starts toward the lake. As he gets closer he hears women screaming and thinking something is wrong he sprints to the lake but to his surprise he finds three girls skinny-dipping. As soon as he gets to the shore the three girls see him and swim to the middle of the lake. They yell, "You're not coming in and we're not coming out until you leave." So thinking fast he holds up the bucket and says, "I'm not here to swim. I'm here to feed the alligators!"

An Old Man and His Lake

An old man went down to his lake to clear brush from a recent storm. When he arrived he found 8 beautiful women skinny dipping in the water. Seeing him the women yelled "you get out of here old man. We're staying under the water until you're long gone so you don't see a thing." Quickly the old man replied "I apologize ladies. I'm not here to spy on you. I just came to feed the alligators."

The clever old man

One evening an old farmer decided to go down to the pond, as he hadnt been in a while. He grabbed a five gallon bucket to bring back some fruit. As he neared the pond he heard voices shouting and laughing with glee.
As he came closer he saw a bunch of young women skinny dipping in his pond. He made the women aware of his presence and they all went to the deep end. One of the women shouted at him "we're not coming out till you leave!" The old man frowned "I didnt come down here to watch you ladies swim n**... or make you get out of the pond n**...." Holding up the bucket he said, "Im here to feed the alligator."

A man decided to go skinny dipping

He found a secluded pond in the woods and went for a n**... swim. Some kids happened by and decided to steal his clothes as a joke and only left his straw hat. When the man finally noticed his clothes were missing, he grabbed his hat, covered the family jewels, and made a run for home. On the way he passed a house with an old woman in a rocking chair on the porch. When she noticed what was happening she burst into laughter. The man stopped and said, "Madam, if you were a lady you would not be laughing." Once the woman could control her laughter, she replied, "If you were a gentleman, you would tip your hat!"

A priest and a rabbi are very good friends, so they decide to go skinny dipping in a remote lake

All of a sudden, two busses pull up. Out of one pours the rabbi's congregation and out of the other pours the priest's congregation.
Their clothes are on the other side of the lake, so they don't have time to retrieve them. Both decide to just make a run for it.
The priest, running with his hands covering his g**... looks over and sees the rabbi running with his hands over his face. He says, Rabbi! What are you doing?
The rabbi says, "In my community, they recognize me by my face."

One evening an old farmer went down to the pond...

One evening an old farmer went to go down to the pond, as he hasn't been there in a while, he grabbed a five gallon bucket and some fruit. As he neared the pond, he heard some voices shouting and laughing with glee. As he came closer he saw it was a bunch of young women skinny dipping in his pond. He made the women aware of his presence and they all went to the deep end. One of the women shouted at him "we're not coming out until you leave!" The old man frowned, "I didn't come down here to watch you ladies swim n**... or get out of the pond n**...". Holding the bucket up he said "I'm here to feed the alligator."

An old farmer was picking apples. After filling up a bucket and walking back to the farm, he saw a group of beautiful women swimming in his pond

As he got closer, he realized they were skinny dipping. When the group noticed the old farmer approaching them, one girl shouts to him "we are not coming out until you turn away". The farmer, thinking quick, holds up the bucket of apples and says "I'm just here to feed the gator anyway"

A farmer was picking apples when he heard a noise from his pond. He walks over and sees three young women skinny dipping.

They notice him and crouch in the water up to their shoulders. Go away! Stop spying on us! The farmer says Sorry ladies, but I didn't come out here to see you n**.... Holding up his apple bucket he says I came to feed the alligator.

Skinny dipping

A farmer heads down to the pond carrying a bucket. As he nears the pond he hears voices. It's a bunch of girls skinny dipping. The girls hear him coming and all head down to the deep end. "We see you!" shouts one of them. "We're not coming out until you've gone". The farmer says "What? You think I've come all this way just to see a bunch of n**... girls? Sheesh. Nahhh, I just came down here to feed the alligator".

Security Guard : "I'm sorry ma'am but skinny dipping is prohibited in this beach "

Woman : " You could have warned me before I removed the clothes"
Security guard :" Well, there is no law about that".