Sir Arthur Jokes
30 sir arthur jokes and hilarious sir arthur puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about sir arthur that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Sir Arthur Short Jokes
Short sir arthur jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The sir arthur humour may include short sir isaac jokes also.
- Which knight did King Arthur leave in charge of constructing the round table? Sir Cumference
- The fattest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference.
He acquired his size from too much pi. - Heard this one from my 8 year old and couldn't stop laughing Q: Who made King Arthur's table round?
A: Sir Cumference - Many people know of King Arthur and his Knights of The Round Table. However, most people do not know who first proposed and created the round table: Sir Cumfrence.
- Back in medieval times King Arthur had a knight that collected taxes His name was Sir Charge
- Why did Arthur want to use the knife Lancelot had given 5 stars? Because it was Sir-rated.
- King Arthur's birthday party at the round table. King Arthur looked down at the pastries and asked "Are these all Cake?"
"Two are pie" replied Sir Cumference
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Sir Arthur One Liners
Which sir arthur one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with sir arthur? I can suggest the ones about sir cumference and medieval knight.
- Who did King Arthur leave in charge of security? Sir Veillance
- What do you call a gathering of Arthur's Knights? A Sir conference.
- Which knight of King Arthur is the most hygienic? Sir Cumcised
- Who did King Arthur leave in charge of watching his eight electrons? Sir Valence!
- What did King Arthur name his cat? Sir Purrcival.
- Who made King Arthur very anxious? Sir Prise!
- What knight did King Arthur send to the Slavic countries? Sir Bia
- What was the name of the person who did King Arthurs Table? " Sir Conference "
- Did you know that a cow had a seat on King Arthur's roundtable? His name was Sir l**....
Experience Good Cheer with Hilarious Sir Arthur Jokes and Friends
What funny jokes about sir arthur you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean english man jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make sir arthur pranks.
King Arthur was in Merlin's laboratory where the good wizard was showing him his latest invention.
It was a chastity belt... except it had a rather large hole in the most obvious place.
'This is no good, Merlin!' the king exclaimed, 'Look at this opening. How is this supposed to protect m'lady, the Queen?'
'Ah, sire, just observe.' said Merlin as he searched his cluttered workbench until he found what he was looking for.
He then selected his most worn out wand, one that he was going to discard anyway. He then inserted it in the gaping aperture of the chastity belt whereupon a small guillotine blade came down and cut it neatly in two. 'Merlin, you are a genius!' cried the grateful monarch, 'Now I can leave, knowing that my Queen is fully protected.'
After putting Guinevere in the device, King Arthur then set out upon his Quest. Several years passed until he returned to Camelot. Immediately he assembled all his knights in the courtyard and had them drop their trousers for an informal 'short arm' inspection.
Sure enough! Each and every one of them was either amputated or damaged in some way. All of them except Sir Galahad.
'Sir Galahad' exclaimed King Arthur, 'the one and only true knight! Only you among all the nobles have been true to me. What is it in my power to grant you? Name it and it is yours!'
But, alas, Sir Galahad was speechless..
5 Jokes About Pi
1. Divide the circumference of a pumpkin by its diameter and what do you get?
Pumpkin Pi
2. I saw a movie and gave it a 3.1415 out of 5.
It was Life of Pi
3. My friend decided to get a tattoo of the symbol pi on his face.
It was an irrational decision
4. Who was the roundest knight at King Arthur's table?
Sir Cumference . but how did he get that way?
eating too much Pi.
5. I hate all these Pi jokes.
They go on forever.
With that last one I'll show myself the door.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Which of King Arthur's Knights of the Round Table had the worst complexion?
Sir Lance-a-lot
Once there were two pirates who were identical twins...
These twins, the Tillery brothers, were named Arthur and Artemis, but both of them liked to be called Art. The only way that the captain and crew could tell them apart was by weight: Arthur was much fatter than his twin.
One day, the pirate ship was attacked by a Royal Navy ship. "All hands on deck!" The captain ordered. He pointed to the cannons and shouted, "Fire the heavy artillery!"
Hearing this, one of the pirates picked up Arthur, shoved him in the cannon, and fired.
"What did you do that for?" The captain asked.
"Sorry sir," the pirate replied. "But I'm sure you told me to fire the heavy Art Tillery."
Only Beer drinkers would understand
In Amsterdam, a world wide convention of brewers was held.
The presidents of many of the world's greatest breweries were on hand, and many of them decided to go out for dinner together on the first evening.
The waiter asked what they would like to drink, and the CEO of Miller said, The Best Beer in the world, an MGD please!
The president of Budweiser asked for The King of Beers, make it a Bud! .
Adolph Coors requested a From mountain spring water, the clearest beer, a Coors if you don't mind.
And so it went around the large table, each president asking for the brew from his own company as if it was the best.
Finally, the waiter came to Arthur Guinness.
And you sir? he queried.
I'll have a Coke! was Guinness's reply.
A Coke??!? The waiter was shocked.
Wouldn't you rather have a Guinness, sir?
Arthur looked at the waiter, and gestured to his companions. Well, he said, If they're not drinking beer, then neither will I!