Singer Jokes

150 singer jokes and hilarious singer puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about singer that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Looking for a laugh? Check out our collection of singer jokes. From poking fun at Bieber to making light of Gaga, we've got all your favorite pop stars covered.

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Funniest Singer Short Jokes

Short singer jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The singer humour may include short musician jokes also.

  1. Bill Withers Duck joke How do you turn a duck into a soul singer?
    Leave it in the oven till it's Bill Withers.
  2. Awful pun I came up with whilst drunk last night. Who is the australian Frankesntein's favourite singer?

    Rihanna, mate.
  3. A failed rapper, a failed rock star, and a mediocre country singer walk into a bar He tells the bartender "anything but Budweiser."
  4. Now that vehicles are driving themselves... It won't be long until a country singer writes a song about their truck leaving them too.
  5. I like metal bands with female lead singers... Something about women screaming makes me rock hard.
  6. How do you turn a duck into a blues singer? Put it in the microwave until it's Bill Withers
  7. neil diamond........ Singer Neil Diamond started his career as Neil coal, he changed his name when the pressure got to him.
  8. Due to the rise of autonomous vehicles It's only a matter of time until a country singer makes a song about his truck leaving them.
  9. How many country singers does it take to change a lightbulb? One to put in the new one, and two to sing about how good the old one was.
  10. How do you know when there's a lead singer on your porch? They can't find the right key and don't know when to come in.

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Singer One Liners

Which singer one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with singer? I can suggest the ones about sings and music artist.

  1. What is a guy who hangs out with musicians called? A singer
  2. Why are pirates such good singers? Because they hit the high C's.
  3. I've got a friend who writes songs about sewing machines. He's a singer songwriter.
  4. Why don't cannibals eat Gospel singers? They keep throwing up their hands.
  5. What singer is known for saying "Hit me baby one more time" Rihanna
  6. My friend composes lyrics about sewing machines. She's a Singer songwriter.
  7. My friend writes songs about sewing machines. He's a singer songwriter or sew it seams.
  8. TIL Korean singers never say, "Yes daddy!" They say, "K pops!"
  9. I come from a very musical family Even the sewing machine's a singer
  10. How does the lead singer of Nickelback prove his identity? "Look at this photograph"
  11. What was the name of that old French singer again? I keep forgetting.
  12. Which singer has problems casting spells? Barry Mana Low
  13. I used to date an opera singer, but it didn't work out. She was all mi, mi, mi.
  14. My friend writes songs about sewing machines. He's a Singer song writer.
  15. An 80s singer caught himself on fire, what does he do? Stop, Drop, and Rick-Roll

Lead Singer Jokes

Here is a list of funny lead singer jokes and even better lead singer puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • What did Dave Grohl, lead singer of the Foo Fighters, say after his sandwich was stolen? There goes my hero!
  • Why did the lead singer of system of a down get in to the food industry? Because of his self-righteous soup-n-sides
  • The lead singer of Disturbed has Covid-19 He is really down with the sickness
    Thanks for the gold!!
  • I like rock bands named after their lead singers Like Marilyn Manson, Alice Cooper, and Tool.
  • I have a photograph of me and the lead singer of REM .... That's me in the corner and that's him in the spotlight.
  • Why did the lead singer of Drowning Pool lose his job at Starbucks? HE LET BISCOTTI HIT THE FLOOR
  • I just met the lead singer of Mushroomhead He seems like a fungi
  • A bunch of 80s action stars dressed up as Skid Row for Halloween but they couldn't figure out who would be the lead singer. But Arnold Schwarzenegger said "I'll be Bach"
  • Why is Perl Jam's new lead singer fat free? They couldn't find a Butter Man!
  • I used to date the lead singer of the cranberries Until i found out she was cheating on me....turns out she had some turkey on the side. :D

Opera Singer Jokes

Here is a list of funny opera singer jokes and even better opera singer puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • What did The Magic Flute opera singer say when his son asked him whether his putting on a costume loaded with feathers meant that he was a homosexual? Papa gay? No!
  • My ex-girlfriend was an opera singer. With her it was always "me me me"
  • What are the first three numbers of an opera singer's phone number? aria code
  • What is a classical singer's big break? An opera-tunity.
  • What do you call it when a singer gets a chance? An opera-tunity!
  • Shouldn't opera singers be good sailors? Since they're good at high C's.
  • Why is it hard to have Opera singers as friends?'s aways about "mi mi mi".
  • I used to date an opera singer, but I had to get rid of her... She was all "Mi, mi, mi..."
  • What did the opera singer say when he was cutting down a tree? Timbre!
  • Why do Opera singers like strumpets (prostitutes)? Because they'll do anything for a tenner.
Singer joke, Why do Opera singers like strumpets (prostitutes)?

Pop Singer Jokes

Here is a list of funny pop singer jokes and even better pop singer puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • TIL Ariana Grande is actually a pop singer. I thought it was a fancy coffee for white supremacists.
  • What do you call an Irish J-Pop singer? Rady O'Gaga
  • Which pop singer is a favorite among ISIS fighters? Sharia Carey
  • What do you call a man pretending to be a famous American pop singer? Akon
  • What do an angry conductor and a line of pop singers have in common? They're both madonna train.
  • Whats the difference between a North Korean missile and a K-Pop singer? The singer can have a hit
  • What's the difference between a singer and a farm animal that wants plastic surgery? One's Iggy Pop. The other's piggy op.
  • What do you call a really smart dance-pop singer? Cerebral Halsey
  • What do you get when you cross a tomato with a hungover pop singer? Keshup
  • What kind of computer does a big-b**... female pop singer use? Adele

Singer Sewing Machine Jokes

Here is a list of funny singer sewing machine jokes and even better singer sewing machine puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • My friend composes songs about sewing machines. He's a Singer songwriter or sew it seams. (Don't hate me.)
  • I have a friend who writes lyrics about sewing machines She is a Singer songwriter, or sew it seams
    They'll keep you bobbin your head.
  • My friend writes songs about sewing machines... Yes...He's a Singer songwriter....or sew it seams !!
  • I have a friend who writes ballads about antique sewing machines... He's a Singer songwriter it seams...
  • Two sewing machines were walking down the road... As they pass by each other one says to the other "Hey are you that Singer?".
    The other replies "Janome?".
  • I write songs about sewing machines I'm a Singer Songwriter

Singer Songwriter Jokes

Here is a list of funny singer songwriter jokes and even better singer songwriter puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • What's the difference between a singer-songwriter and a puppy? A puppy eventually grows up and stops whining.
    Thanks to PuddinHead742 for this one.
  • What singer-songwriter got his start as a shepherd? Ed Shearin'
  • Did you hear beloved singer songwriter w**... Nelson died today? He was playing on the road again.
Singer joke, Did you hear beloved singer songwriter w**... Nelson died today?

Great Singer Jokes to Share, Laugh and Enjoy with Friends

What funny jokes about singer you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean guitarist jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make singer pranks.

I was eating in an Indian Restaurant when the waiter came over and say "Curry ok?"

I said "no thanks, i'm not much of a singer".

A blind man walks into a bar and asks, "You all wanna hear a blonde joke?"

The female bartender responds, "Let me stop you right there. I'm a blonde. The big bouncer at the door is a blonde. There's a biker chick sitting next to you, who is also a blonde. The singer on the stage, the manager of the bar, and two of the people at the table behind you are all blondes. Now think, do you REALLY want to tell that joke here?
"Nah," the man sighs, "not if I'm gonna have to explain it 7 times."

A bass player runs into a bar...

where the guitar player and the singer are busy setting up. Breathless, he says "We've got a big problem! I locked my keys in the van!" "Whatever, man" says the singer, "We've got a gig to do, we'll worry about it later." "No, you don't understand" said the bassist, "the drummer is trapped inside!"

How do you make a duck into a soul singer?

Put it in the oven at ~~three fifty~~ tree fiddy until it's Bill Withers.

I was going to be an Operatic Singer

Before they threw me out of the hospital.

In response to the Country Singer lightbulb joke, how many guitarists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

1 to do it, and 12 to say they could do it better.

Du Hast

German heavy metal band Rammstein travels to Poland for the next stop on their international tour. As the airport official goes through their passports and checks them in, she asks, "Occupation?"
The singer replies, "No, no. Were just here to perform a show. We'll be gone by tomorrow morning."

Who is the biggest singer right now?

Ariana Grande

A famous singer sang for patients in a hospital.

He finished with a cheerful greeting:
-Bye-bye , and hope you get better!
-Thanks, you too! replied the patients.

What do you call a singer gently swaying from one side to another?

A rocking Cher.

A son and his Dad have an intense argument and the son storms off, furious.

Before he gets out of earshot of his father, he yells "Jim Morrison was a terrible singer and an uninspired artist who never did anything worthwhile".
His father cannot believe this insolence, and screams at the top of his lungs "As long as you live in this house, you will never, EVER SLAM THE DOORS"

What do you call a singer who sells meat?

A Deli.

Singer Adele was rushed to the hospital after a fatal car accident

Paramedics said they found her rolling in the jeep.

The singer thought he was the boss of the band

but it was the guitarist who pulled all the strings.

Which singer should you avoid borrowing Pixar movies from?

Rick Astley, because he's never gonna give you Up.

Did you know that the singer Olly Murs has a sister who is a scientist?

Her name is Polly Murs.
I'll show myself out........

A baby helped me out the other day...

I asked him, "How do I find other songs by the singer of 'Bad Romance'?"
He replied: "Google Gaga"

I've known my whole life that I'm an amazing back-up singer.

Every time I start to sing. People back-up

Bryan Singer and Kevin Spacey walk up to a bar

The bartender asks for their IDs. They walk away and say" well I guess we're not going to find what we're looking for here."

Bill: Ain't there someone else ya'll should be Weinstein yo' time on?

Harvey: Open bathrobes are just roomy, you know… Spacey.
Kevin: I choose to live as a gay man, so no woman can accuse me of Rattner out.
Brett: Hey, when I see a beautiful woman, I just Singer praises.
Bryan: Move along, no one gives Affleck about me.
Ben: Mine was just a little mistake. You need something at least a Sizemore.
Tom: It wasn't me! It was all Cosby drugs, man!

Wait so since there's self driving cars now...

It's only natural that a country singer writes a song about his truck leaving him.

Which elf was the best singer?

Elfis Presley
(I'll get my coat)

A lead singer gets blown by a big fan backstage at the end of a concert and all the band members find him n**....

Group: Ewww! Get a room!
Singer: I would if you could fit three blades the size of a jet engine into my living room!

Why was the amputee such a bad singer?

Because he couldn't hold a note or carry a tune!

Why did the singer of System of a Down open a restaurant?

Because of his self-righteous soup and sides.

What did the optimistic singer say in a failed attempt to save a suicidal man's life?


A talented unemployed singer is like communism

Sounds good, doesn't work.

The lead singer of Smash Mouth is up late with a friend.

The lead singer of Smash Mouth is up late with a friend. His wife's not home; the past few nights she's returned past midnight with increasingly elaborate alibis. He's getting frustrated; he loves her, but he's not sure he can keep giving her the benefit of the doubt. His friend asks what he's going to do when she shows up. His face contorts in frustration. "When I see her face..."
He softens.
"Imma believe 'er."

I met a British dude who insisted that he was a famous singer.

I said that I didn't believe him, but he was Adam Ant.

Soviet Russia used to have a leader who was also a singer in a rock band.

He's none other than John Lenin.

The singer Seal walks into a club.

Good thing he wasn't a baby.

What happens when you try to remove a video of yourself from the internet?

You become a famous Singer.

I just don't understand why black people don't like the police

They have tons of great songs and Sting is a great singer

You know how some singers sing so high that windows break?

When I sing, they also break because people jump out of them.

What's the difference between a t**... and an opera singer?

You can negotiate with a t**....

My son's music teacher called me "your son is just like Elvis!"

"Is he an equally talented singer?" I asked.
"No", she replied. "We found him dead on a toilet."

A couple of italian guys are discussing who, if they could choose any woman in the world, they'd rather bang

One of them says some big name actress, the other says "Virginia Pippilini."
The first guy's like, "Who's that? Is she a model?"
"I don't know"
"I don't know."
"I don't know."
"Well if you don't know, why choose her?"
The guy pulls out a newspaper and points to the headline. "Virginia Pipeline blows 50 men dead."

Captain Jean-Luc Picard needed to mend his torn uniform, but his old Singer was broken. So he took it down to the repair shop...

...and said, "make it sew."

Singers can be selfish arseholes, especially when warming up...

It's all me me me me me me me

what's the difference between a rapper and a country singer?

Country singers keep their h**... in the shed.

Which legendary soul singer had trouble peeing?

u**... Franklin

What vegetable is the best singer?

Corn, because it's always in hominy.

How do you turn a duck into a soul singer?

Put it in the oven until its Bill Withers

Dexter Holland wasn't always lead singer of the Offspring

Long ago he was in the seafood industry. He had a job shucking oysters for a restaurant. Anyway, one day he sees an ad for a competition in oyster shucking, but it is a team challenge. He shows up solo, and knows he won't be let in. His confidence is low at this point, but he still signs up. The attendant notices he only writes down one name, and asks why, to which Dexter replies:
"I'm just a shucker with no shellfish team"

What kind of computer is the best singer?

A dell

Please, no jokes about the passing of singer and 'Rocky Horror' actor Meat Loaf.

For a great many people that's a rather tender subject.

There was a seamstress who wanted to be a singer…

One day, she found a bottle, rubbed it, and inside was a genie. The genie granted her 3 wishes. Her 1st wish was I want to be a singer .
Her wish was granted, and she was turned into a sewing machine.

Whats the difference between your tweaker neighbor and your grandma's favorite singer?

One's a bony tenant and one's a Tony Bennett.

Singer joke, Whats the difference between your tweaker neighbor and your grandma's favorite singer?

jokes about singer