Shrink Jokes

71 shrink jokes and hilarious shrink puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about shrink that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Laugh in the face of therapy with a collection of shrink jokes! Read through these lighthearted jokes and gags, touching on key topics like diagnosis and the patient-doctor relationship. Find out if humor can provide relief for a stressful subject.

Best Short Shrink Jokes

Short shrink jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The shrink humour may include short shorten jokes also.

  1. A man runs into a doctors office screaming: "You've gotta help me doc! I'm shrinking!" The doctor says: "I'm sorry sir I'm very busy today. You'll have to be a little patient."
  2. A patient runs into a doctor's surgery yelling out: I'm shrinking! I'm shrinking! What should I do? The doctor replies: you are just going to have to be a little patient.
  3. I think I'm shrinking! A man rushed into the doctor's office and shouted, "Doctor! I think I'm shrinking!"
    The doctor calmly responded, "Now, settle down. You'll just have to be a little patient."
  4. Me: You've gotta let me see a doctor, I'm shrinking! Nurse: Well, the doctor's busy, so you'll just have to be a little patient.
  5. I told the doctor I had to see him right away because I thought I was shrinking He told me he was busy and that I'd have to be a little patient
  6. A panic-stricken man explained to his doctor, You have to help me; I think I'm shrinking. Now settle down, the doctor calmly told him. You're just going to have to be a little patient.
  7. A man walks into a doctor's office and panicks.. Man: "Doctor, I'm shrinking!"
    Doctor: "Well, sir you will have to learn to be a little patient."
  8. I got sprayed in the chest by a skunk so I had my tiny therapist wash my clothes for me. My shrunk shrink stopped my shirt's skunk stink.
  9. A woman walks into her psychiatrist's office and says, "I believe I can see into the future" The shrink asks, "When did this start?"
    "Next Tuesday"
  10. A shrinking man walks into a doctors office. The receptionist says, "you'll have to be a little patient".

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Shrink joke, A shrinking man walks into a doctors office.

Make fun with this list of one liners, jokes and riddles. Each joke is crafted with thought and creativity, delivering punchlines that are unexpected and witty. The humor about shrink can easily lighten the mood and bring smiles to people's faces. This compilation of shrink puns is not just entertaining but also a testament to the art of joke-telling. The jokes in this list are designed to display different humor styles, ensuring that every reader at any age finds something entertaining. Constantly updated, they offer a source of fun that ensures one is always smiling !

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Shrink One Liners

Which shrink one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with shrink? I can suggest the ones about tighten and expand.

  1. It's not your dryer that's shrinking your clothes... It's your refrigerator.
  2. "Mom, the dryer is shrinking my clothes." "No dear, the refrigerator is doing that."
  3. I thought the dryer was shrinking my clothes Turns out it was the refrigerator all along.
  4. I used to think I was a hypochondriac... Till my shrink told me it was all in my head.
  5. What does an electrician call his hot therapist? A heat shrink
  6. I asked my shrink how he felt about the lack of progress he was making.
  7. Lil Nas X, Lil Baby, and Lil Pump made a new rap group It's called Shrink Rap
  8. What did the doctor tell the shrinking person? He has to be a little patient.
  9. How do you become a hobbit? Eat, shrink and be Merry!
  10. If men "shrink" when it's cold out . . . ... then do women "clam shut" ?
  11. Why did the hoagie go to the shrink? He was having problems with his sub-conscious.
  12. A man wrapped in plastic goes to visit his shrink... Dr: Well, I clearly see your nuts.
  13. If you shrink a sweater by ironing it... Is it de-creased?
  14. I saw a shrink for a few months. Now I have smaller self esteem.
  15. My shrink told me I was obsessed with revenge But things won't stay like this...

Shrink joke, My shrink told me I was obsessed with revenge

Comical Puns & Laughs: Enjoy Fun, Witty Shrink Jokes with Friends.

What funny jokes about shrink you can tell and make people laugh? One example I can give are clean shredded jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help make shrink prank.

Rude awakening

A wife went in to see a therapist and said, "I've got this problem doctor. Every time we're in bed my husband climaxes, he let's out this ear splitting yell." "My dear," the shrink said "that's completely natural. I don't see what the problem is.". "The problem," she complains, " is that it wakes me up."

A shrinking man visits his doctor yelling, "Doctor! Doctor! I'm getting smaller and smaller and smaller!!!"

His Doctor replies, "Now now, I can't fix things right away, you'll just have to be a little patient."

The invisible man and the shrink

The receptionist tells the psychiatrist that there's a man in the waiting room who claims to be invisible.
The Psychiatrist says, "Tell him I can't see him right now."

So a man walks into a psychiatrist's office wearing nothing but a piece of shrink wrap...

The doctor looks up and says;
"I can clearly see your nuts."

In the shrinks office...

* jack paces around muttering "I'm a wig-Wam; I'm a tee-pee. I'm a wig-wam; I'm a tee-pee." Shrink urges, "you need to take a seat, you're too tents."
* meanwhile the receptionist presses the emergency button because a deranged man walked in wearing nothing but a plastic wrap thong. Shrink asks through the intercom, "why do you think he's deranged?" The receptionist responds, "Doc, I can clearly see he's nuts."

Rorschach Test

A man walks into a psychiatrist's office for his first appointment. After the initial interview, the shrink decides to ease the man into the process with a simple inkblot test. After a few minutes, however, the shrink calls a halt.
"I think its fairly clear at this point that we're dealing with an Oedipus Complex." says the shrink.
"*I'VE* got an Oedipus Complex?!?" the man bursts out, "*You're* the one with all these pictures of my parents having s**...!"

Doctors are funny !

A doctor was talking with his shrink. He was feeling guilty about having s**... with his one of his patients.
I know these things happen but I just can't get it out of my mind. What do you think I can do ?
The psychiatrist looked at him intently and said Maybe you should refer your patient to another vet.

How many shrinks does it take to change a tire?

Well, first the tire really has to want to change...

A man walks into a psychiatrist's office wearing only shorts made of plastic cling wrap..

A man walks into a psychiatrist's office wearing only shorts made of plastic cling wrap. The man says to the shrink, "Sir, I need you to evaluate me." The psychiatrist looks up from his clipboard, sighs, and says, "Well, I can clearly see your nuts."

A man rushes into a psychiatrist's office and shouts "Doctor, you have to help me! I think I'm invisible."

The shrink looks at his appointment schedule and says "I'm sorry, I can't see you right now."

A man tells his shrink he's no longer attracted to his wife.

"For some reason I'm only a**... by small pieces of fruit."
"I've seen this before, you have Twin Syndrome.," the doc replies.
"Twin Syndrome?"
"You only come in pears."

A man went to see a shrink

He entered the room and remained standing by the door.
"I'm here because my wife treats me like a dog" the man said.
"Ok" the shrink replied, "Come and sit on this sofa and we can talk some more about this problem".
"No, i can't" said the man... "I'm not allowed on the sofa"

A guy goes to his psychologist wrapped only in shrink wrap.

The psychologist says, "I can clearly see you're nuts."

A guy walks into the psychiatrist wearing only plastic wrap for shorts...

The shrink says, "Well, I can clearly see you're nuts."

When in doubt ...

Wife : I doubt my husband has been cheating on me.... I have doubt on one woman we both know.... What to do?
Shrink: Take your husband to that woman's doorstep and see if his wi-fi connects automatically.

After accidentally shooting his pet with the shrink ray, my friend decided to give the pet away.

It's my newt now.

An engineer, a mathmetician, and a physicist are hired by a farmer to build the smallest fence possible to hold all his sheep.

The physicist makes a large fence and gradually shrinks it over and over until he cannot shrink it any further.
The engineer stacks all the sheep in a specific way and builds a small fence around them.
The mathmetician builds a tiny fence around himself and then defines himself as outside the fence.

They say you shrink when you get older.

My grandma lost a foot in her old age, but I think that was more so due to the gangrene.

A shrinking man rushes to the doctor's office.

The shrinking man skips ahead of everyone waiting and pleas "Doctor! Doctor! I need help, I'm shrinking!"
Then the doctor replies, "well then you'll just have to be a little patient."

You know how things shrink when they get cold?

I'm not short, I'm cool.

A Second Opinion

Lenny tells the psychiatrist, Every time I get into bed, I think there's somebody under it.
Come to me three times a week for two years, and I'll cure your fears, says the shrink. And I'll charge you only $200 a visit.
Lenny says he'll think about it. Six months later, he runs into the doctor, who asks why he never came back. For $200 a visit? says Lenny. A bartender cured me for $10.
Is that so! How?
He told me to cut the legs off the bed.

A man goes to see a psychiatrist wearing nothing but plastic shrink wrap for clothes.

The doctor looks at him and says, Well, I can clearly see your nuts!

A man goes to see a psychiatrist.

He is wearing nothing but clear saran wrap on his body in lieu of clothes. One look at him and the shrink says, Well, I can clearly see you're nuts.

d**... Sporting Goods stores have all have a summer sports section in their parking lot that is packed up in the winter months, making the stores a bit smaller.

Meaning d**... shrink when it's cold.

My grandma has been seeing a shrink recently and things only seem to be getting worse for her

She's gone from 5'2" to 4'9" in the span of two weeks!

The shrinks diagnosed me as a sociopath with paranoid delusions.

But they're just out to get me.

Guy goes to his shrink and says, "I think I'm a French pair of shoes!"

The shrink replies, "What makes you chaussures?"

Three women were at a shrink's office with their kids

The shrink told the first woman, You love food so you named your child Candy. He told the second, You love money so you named your child Penny. The third woman told her son, This is ridiculous. Let's get out of here, Peter.

They say you shrink when you get older

My grandma lost a foot in her old age, but i think it had something to do with diabetes.

A man walks into a psychologist's office...

And he was wearing absolutely nothing but a piece of Saran wrap around his waist. The shrink looks at him and says, "Well, I can clearly see your nuts."

Why the airline companies continue to shrink their seats?

They are air**line** not air**bar**!

I work as a spy for the US government.

One of my more deadly assignments involved going after a mad scientist in Italy. I was having dinner with one of my contacts over some delicious cheesy rigatoni. Then, out of nowhere, I was hit by a shrink ray and tossed into my food with the sound of evil laughter. Fraught by the perils of steaming hot carbs around me, I knew that for now, escape would have to be my mission.
Mission in pasta bowl.

The psychiatrist asks the patient, "So what seems to be the problem?"

"Well Doc, for a long time now, I've believed that I'm really a dog!"
"And how long have you felt this way?", asks the shrink.
"Ever since I was a puppy."

How many shrinks does it take to change a lightbulb?

One. But the light bulb has to really want to change.

A psychiatrist was testing a patient's personality. He drew a circle on a paper.

And asked the patient, What does this remind you of?
The patient answered, s**....
The shrink drew a square and asked again, What does this remind you of?
s**..., the patient replied.
Then the doctor drew a triangle.
It reminds me of s**..., the patient stated.
You seem to be obsessed with s**..., the shrink told the patient.
*I'm* obsessed with s**...? *You're* the one who's drawing the dirty pictures!

The Man Who Needed Help.

So, a man walks into a Physiatrist office, he is wearing no clothing, but he is wrapped from head to toe in Saran wrap...
He asks the Shrink if in his profession opinion the man is okay.
The Physiatrist say; "Well I can clearly see your nuts!".
The man in Cling wrap turns around too walk about before sarcastically blurting out; "Woah, Thanks Doc...", then walked out of the Physiatrist office.
The Physiatrist looks at his receptionist and say's; "Did you see that a**...!".

A man walks into his psychiatrist appointment wearing nothing but cellophane

The shrink takes one look at him and says Well, I can clearly see your nuts.

A pair of conjoined twins went to see the psychiatrist. Twin A confessed to wanting to have s**... with twin B. The shrink responded...

Hey, you do you.

A guy walks into a psychiatrists office wearing nothing but Saran wrap.

The shrink looks at him and says "well I can clearly see you're nuts.."

Did you hear? One of the Avengers got hit by a shrink ray.

He's fine, but he might be a little Thor for a while.

A patient in a psychiatric hospital is being examined by a shrink. The shrink hands him a piece of paper and asks him, "Look at this inkblot and tell me what do you see."

"Well," the patient says, "I'm not 100% sure, but it looks like Rorschach Series IV, blot #17."

Shrink joke, A patient in a psychiatric hospital is being examined by a shrink. The shrink hands him a piece of p

jokes about shrink

Jokes are a form of humor that often involves clever wordplay, puns or unexpected twists in a story. These are usually short narratives or anecdotes crafted with the intent of amusing its audience by ending in an unexpected or humorous punchline. Jokes are a universal form of entertainment that people of all ages like adults, teens, kids and toddlers can enjoy. JokoJokes' FAQ section has answers to questions you may have!

The impact of these shrink jokes can be both social and psychological. They can help to ease tensions, create bonds between people, and even improve overall mental health. The success of a joke often relies on the delivery, timing, and audience. Jokes can be used in various settings, from social gatherings to professional presentations, and are often employed to lighten the mood or enhance a story.