Shredded Jokes
90 shredded jokes and hilarious shredded puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about shredded that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
In this article, we explore some of the funniest jokes and puns related to some of our favorite foods, including shredded wheat, shredded cheese, vinaigrette, crossfit, and guacamole. Get ready to laugh out loud with these hilarious jokes!
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Funniest Shredded Short Jokes
Short shredded jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The shredded humour may include short shattered jokes also.
- You know Murphy's Law. It's "If something can go wrong, it will", but do you know Cole's law? It's... shredded cabbage, mayonnaise, maybe some carrot.
- What does a Chicago police officer and a professional skateboarder have in common? They both shred footage.
(*be gentle, it's my first time.*) - Shredded cheese has officially been banned in grocery stores in the US. Trump will make America grate again.
- Donald Trump is introducing a 30% tax on shredded cheese. It's part of his plan to Make America Grate Again.
- I had a job where I had to put shredded cheese back together It was the most degrating job I've ever had.
- Did you hear about the cheese who works out? Did you hear about the cheese who works out?
It was shredded. - "For every action there is an equal and opposite reaction.." - Newton's Law "Shredded cabbage and carrot make a great salad." - Cole's Law
- Did you see that Sargento is going to stop selling shredded cheese? They're trying to make America grate again
- A man walks into a gym and kills everyone there brutally After the investigation, the police state that the victims could only be described as ripped and shredded
- Republicans in Congress have proposed a bill to ban the sale of shredded cheese in supermarkets across the country They want to Make America Grate Again.
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Shredded One Liners
Which shredded one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with shredded? I can suggest the ones about ripped and chopped.
- President Trump just banned shredded cheeses. He wants to Make America Grate Again
- We all know Murphy's Law, but little is known of Cole's Law "Shredded Cabbage."
- When we make pizza at home it's my wife's job to shred the cheese. She's the gratist.
- I asked my wife if she wanted me to shred some cheese. She said "that would be grate!"
- What do you call a hen staring at a bowl of shredded lettuce? Chicken sees a salad
- Any leftover cabbage can and will be shredded and mixed with mayonnaise. -Cole's Law
- How did Jesus get so muscular and shredded? Crossfit
- If the U.S. ran out of shredded cheese... we would have to "make America grate again"
- What did the cheese say before it got shredded? Oh grate...
- We need to ban pre shredded cheese... Make America grate again.
- I'm tired of pre shredded cheese Make America grate again
- What do you call a cheese that works out? Shredded cheese.
- Do you think Mr. Cheese has been going to the gym? I mean look at him, he's shredded!
- Shredded cabbage tastes better than unshredded cabbage Cole's Law
- Trump BANS the sale of shredded cheese He wants to make America grate again
Shredded Cheese Jokes
Here is a list of funny shredded cheese jokes and even better shredded cheese puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- I heard Donald Trump is going to ban shredded cheese. Part of his plan to make America grate again.
- If Trump wins a second term he will halt all shredded cheese production. He is going to make Americans grate again . . .
- A man tried to start a fight by throwing dough, shredded cheese, and tomato sauce at me. So I said, You wanna pizza me?
- Apparently Trump wants to outlaw pre-shredded cheese... ...he keeps going on and on about how he wants to make America grate again...
- Because of his loss in Wisconsin, Trump has put a ban on all shredded cheese. It's the only way he can make America GRATE again.
Credit to my 12 year old son. - Apparently loads of people turned away from voting for Trump coz he wanted to ban shredded cheese He wanted to Make America Grate again.
- Donald Trump has just announced a massive jobs program involving tax credits for shredded cheese factories. He says he wants to "make America grate again."
- If I put a cheddar cheese stick in a pencil sharpener Will it come out sharp or shredded?
- What kind of cheese do skateboarders eat? Shredded cheese.
- The National Shredded Cheese Council just endorsed Donald Trump for president... They're ready to make America grate again.
Shredded Wheat Jokes
Here is a list of funny shredded wheat jokes and even better shredded wheat puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- I bought some Shredded wheat, but I think it's a bit of a con. It's no more muscular than regular wheat.
- What type of cereal goes to the gym twice a day? Shredded wheat.
I wish I could pin this joke on a 4-year-old, I'm so sorry - What does a muscular pothead have for breakfast? Shredded Wheat
Fun-Filled Shredded Jokes to Make You and Your Friends Chuckle & Giggle
What funny jokes about shredded you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean shaken jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make shredded pranks.
Everybody knows of Murphy's law, anything that can go wrong, will. But have you heard of Cole's Law?
It's usually just finely shredded cabbage.
Breaking: Donald Trump just announced ban on shredded cheese if elected!
He says this is a crucial step toward Making America Grate Again.
How does a lawyer from Panama play his guitar?
He shreds.
THIS JUST IN: Foreign suppliers of shredded cheese on strike.
Eyewitnesses report protesting workers holding signs that read: "MAKE AMERICA GRATE AGAIN"
A Pitbull and w**... dog get into a fight.
w**... dog rips the Pitbull into shreds. Terrified Pitbull owner says: - what kind of a dog is this? - how much did you pay for it? The w**... owner says: -well, I paid $100 for a crocodile and $10000 for the plastic surgery.
Jesus must have had a chiseled, muscular body...
I mean, he did cross fit, for God's sake. And the Bible tells us he was cut, ripped, and shredded.
What type of cheese is strong?
Shredded cheese.
What is the law that requires cabbage to be shredded and covered in a vinaigrette?
Cole's Law
What do you call a salad leaf that constantly works out?
Shredded lettuce
My dad always said: "When life gets you down, shred cheese."
That was grate advice.
The principle difference's between Murphy's law and Cole's law
Murphy's law postulates that whatever can go wrong, will go wrong.
Cole's law primarily consists of thinly shredded cabbage, carrot and mayonnaise.
Some of my clothes are getting ripped to shreds when I use the washing machine.
It keeps happening every time. I think it's a vicious cycle.
Have you heard of Murphy's Law?
Yes it's if something can go wrong it will go wrong.
Have you heard of Coles Law?
No. What's that?
It's finely shredded raw cabbage in a dressing.
Hilarious cow jokes
What do you call a cow with 3 legs?
- tri-tip
What do you call a cow with 2 legs?
- lean beef
What do you call a cow with 1 leg?
- steak
What do you call a cow with no legs?
- ground beef
What do you call a cow who works out?
- shredded beef
What do you call a m**... cow?
- beef stroganoff
Why does the milk stool only have three legs?
- because the cow has the udder
Murphy's Law states that anything that can happen, will happen. But are you familiar with Cole's Law?
It's finely-shredded raw cabbage with a salad dressing, commonly either vinaigrette or mayonnaise.
You may know Murphy's law, but have you heard of Coles law?
It is a side dish consisting primarily of finely shredded raw cabbage with a salad dressing, commonly either vinaigrette or mayonnaise.
engineers
4 engineers are traveling down a road when suddenly the car comes to a stop
The electrical engineer says "the battery died"
The chemical engineer says "we ran out of fuel"
The civil engineer says "the road shredded the tires"
The computer engineer says "why don't we get out of the car and then back in?"
Here's a joke for English and irish
So 3 people go to the middle East, a German a English and a irish. They get captured and sent to a Prince, the Prince gives them each one wish and 20 whips to the back. The German goes first and asks for a pillow on his back, he gets the pillow and the whips but it doesn't work. Next is the English he asks for two pillows and again it shreds throgh them. Next is the Irish, the prince's wife grants him one more since she likes his people. The Irish man first asks for 100 whips, and for the English guy to be strapped to his back.
Scientists say they may be able to synthesize a completely clean biofuel using the enzymes in finely shredded fungi, such as mushrooms...
Some critics have questioned the ethics of the process, but admit they are comforted by the researchers' strong Morel fibre.
The only way I'm getting shredded at the gym
is if my shoelace gets caught in the stairmaster.
A man with a piece of paper in his hand comes into an office...
another man is sitting next to a shredding machine.
"Do you know how to operate this thing?" he asks. "I have an important paper here and I want to make sure this is done right."
"Sure," the other man answers. "Just put the paper in here and press this button."
The first man does so, saying, "Great. And where do the copies come out?"
You've all heard of Murphy's Law, but have you heard of Cole's Law?
It's shredded cabbage and carrot in mayonnaise.
What happened when the sparrow flew into the electric fan ?
Shredded tweet.
The pressure of a gas is inversely proportional to its volume—Boyle's Law.
Any leftover cabbage must be shredded and mixed with mayonnaise.
—-Cole's Law.
At my restaurant job, everyone who works in the kitchen is also a musician.
The dishwasher plays guitar OK, but the prep cook shreds on the mandoline.
