Short But Effective Jokes
6 short but effective jokes and hilarious short but effective puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about short but effective that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Short But Effective Funny Jokes to Tell Your Friends and Kids.
What is a good short but effective joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.
A mother was teaching his child about the side-effects of alcohol.
She gets two short glasses, filling one with water and the other with whiskey.
She says "I want you to see this."
She puts a worm in the water, and it swims around.
She puts a worm in the whiskey, and the worm dies immediately.
She then says, feeling that she has made her point clear, "what do you have to say about this experiment?"
The child responds by saying: "If I drink whiskey, I won't get worms!"
People who use drugs are pathetic. I'm high on life!
Side effects of life are include depression, anxiety, pain both emotional and physical, shortness of breath, physical and mental deterioration, weariness, sleepiness, insomnia, thought of s**..., and misery. Prolonged use may result in death.
My girlfriend asked me how my diet was going
I told her using more s**... as an incentive has been really effective thus far.
She responded quizzically, saying, we haven't been having more s**... than usual.
So, long story short, my girlfriend dumped me when she found out when I have been doing on my cheat days.
Spraying Cillit Bang directly into the lungs is fatal
In the short term. But there's been no research whatsoever into the long term effects.
A Finnish Soldier...
In the winter war in 1945 is getting in line for a rifle. The man behind the counter says "sorry, the guy in front of you got the last one. Here, take this hockey stick, and if you see a Russian, point it at him and yell BANG!" The Finn finds this ridiculous but takes it, thinking he'll just fix a bayonet on the thing and fight like that.
As he gets to the bayonet counter, the guy in front of him gets the last one. Instead, he is given a piece of wood about six inches long with the instructions to yell STAB! every time someone is within arms length.
Feeling horribly unprepared, he heads out to battle with his platoon. Shortly, they become separated by snow and wind, and he is left alone with no weapon. A Russian comes over a snowdrift. Desperately, the man throws up his hockey stick and yells BANG! The Russian drops.
So he fights all through the day, yelling BANG and STAB at his will and dropping the enemy like flies. Late in the day, a huge Russian soldier comes plodding toward the man slowly. Feeling confident, the man fires his hockey stick to no effect. He tries a couple more times. Nothing.
Desperately, he throws his small piece of wood at the man, but it just bounces off. Suddenly, the earth around him explodes and he goes flying. Just as he is about to die, the Russian plods on by him saying under his breath "tank, tank, tank, BOOM!"
Church squirrels
All five churches in a small Texas town were having a terrible problem with squirrel infestations. Predictably, they all had different ways of dealing with the problem.
The Presbyterian church called a meeting to decide what to do. After much prayer and consideration they determined that the squirrels were predestined to be there, and they shouldn't interfere with God's divine will.
In the Baptist church, the squirrels had taken up habitation in the baptistery. The deacons met and decided to put a cover on the baptistery and drown the squirrels in it. The squirrels escaped somehow and there were twice as many there the next week.
The Methodist church got together and decided that they were not in a position to harm any of God's creation. So, they humanely trapped the squirrels and set them free a few miles outside of town. Three days later, the squirrels were back.
The Catholic church came up with what they thought was the best and most effective solution: they baptized the squirrels and registered them as members of the church. Now they only see them on Christmas and Easter.
Still, the Jewish synagogue beat them all: they took one squirrel and had a short service with him called a bris -- and they haven't seen a squirrel on the property since.
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