Shoe Shine Jokes

25 shoe shine jokes and hilarious shoe shine puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about shoe shine that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Funniest Shoe Shine Short Jokes

Short shoe shine jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The shoe shine humour may include short shoe polish jokes also.

  1. I saw a black guy running down the street carrying a tv I thought for a second, "man that looks a lot like mine' so I ran home quick and nope there was mine still shining my shoes.
  2. I saw a black man walking down the street with a TV. "That looks a lot like mine..." I thought... Then I remembered mine was at home shining my shoes.
  3. As I was driving home I saw a black man carrying a TV down the street... Nervously, I had to wonder if it was mine, but then I remembered mine was at home shining my shoes
  4. A friend told me he saw a black guy on a stolen bike getting hit by a train I rushed home, afraid that it was mine.
    But thankfully, mine was still in my basement shining my shoes.
  5. So I was walking home from work.... And I saw this black guy carrying a tv and I thought it was mine but then I ran home and mine was still there shining my shoes.
  6. I see a black guy running down the street with a TV and thought it looked like mine, but it wasn't... .. mine was at home shining my shoes.
  7. The guy that polishes my shoes doesn't enjoy Stephen King's books. But he's always loved The Shining
  8. So I was walking down the street the other day, and saw this black guy... carrying a tv. At first I thought, "Hey, that looks like mine!" But then I remembered mine is at home shining my shoes.
  9. Why did the girl eat yeast and shoe polish before bed? She wanted to rise and shine in the morning!
  10. I saw a black man carrying a T.V. today I though that it looked like mine, but when I got home he was still shining my shoes

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Shoe Shine One Liners

Which shoe shine one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with shoe shine? I can suggest the ones about shoe and shines.

  1. What do you get if you cross shoe polish with yeast? Loafers that rise and shine
  2. What happens if you eat yeast and shoe polish? Every morning you will rise and shine.
  3. Yo mamma is so fat when she gets her shoes shined she has to take their word for it.

Shoe Shine Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.

What funny jokes about shoe shine you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean car wash jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make shoe shine pranks.

So I was walking outside yesterday(potentially offensive)...

when I saw a black guy with a TV. I was shocked, and I rushed back home, thinking it was mine. But luckily, it was still there, shining my shoes.

I saw a black man running..

I was walking down the street one evening and I saw a black man running holding a television. I thought to my self "i wonder if that's mine", so I hurried back home and lo and behold it was still there, shining my shoes.

The teacher announces the total for an exam.

Teacher: Okay class, only John got 99/100
John:(to his classmates) Ha! See that?! You people are oozing with stupidity. You people should've followed my example. You guys should just shine shoes for a living or just live the rest of your lives as a mountain hermit. You can all drool at my excellence and you-
Teacher: The rest got 100.

A black man is walking down the street...

I saw a black man walking down the street, carrying a TV with him.
"That's funny" I thought, "I could've sworn that was mine!"
But then I remembered, it *couldn't* be mine, because mine was at home,
Shining my shoes.

I saw a black guy carrying a TV down the street the other day so I had to run back home and check that mine was still there.

It's OK though, mine was still there, just sitting there shining my shoes.

Fulfilling Career

Shoe shining should be just below Bishop in the Church -
They touch so many soles.

I saw a black man walking down the road with a television in his hands, and I thought, "Huh, that kind of looks like mine."

Then I remembered that mine was at home, shining my shoes.

Yo mama is so fat that when she got her shoes shined, she had to take the guy’s word for it.

C, Eb, and G walk into a "bar"

The bartender says, "Sorry, but we don't serve minors" So E-Flat leaves and C and G have an open 5th between them.
After a few drinks the 5th is diminished and the G is out flat. An F comes in and tries to augment the situation but is not sharp enough. A D comes into the bar and heads straight for the bathroom saying,*Excuse me, I'll just be a second"
An A comes into the bar but the bartender is not convinced this realtive of C is not a minor. Then the bartender notices a B-Flat hiding at the end of the bar and excalims, "Get out now! You're the seventh minor I've found in the bar tonight." The E-Flat is not easily deflated, comes back to the bar the next night in a 3-piece suit with nicely shined shoes. The bartender who used to have a nice coporate job until his company downsized, says, "You're looking sharp tonight, come on in! This could be a major development." This proves to be the case as the E-Flat takes off the suit and everything else and stands there au natural.
Eventually C sobers up and realizes in horror he is under a rest. The C is brought to trial, found guilty of contributing to the diminution of a minor, and is sentenced to 10 years of DS without Coda at an upscale correctional facility. On appeal, however, the C is found innocent of any wrong doing, even accidental, and that all accusations to the contrary are bassless.