Shifts Jokes

Humoristic puns and funny pick up lines

I was fired from the keyboard factory today.

I wasn't putting in enough shifts.

I've been fired from work for putting in too many shifts

Keyboard manufacturing isn't as easy as you think

Just got fired from the keyboard factory the other day

Apparently I wasn't putting in enough shifts

Why does the keyboard work 24 hrs a day?

Because it has 2 shifts.

Why don't keyboards sleep?

Because they have 2 shifts.

An idiot, a barber, and a bald man go on a journey...

At some point in the journey, they decide to set up camp for the night, so they agree to stay awake in four hour shifts to guard their stuff. The barber, having the first shift, gets bored and so ends up shaving the idiot's head. When his shift ends, he wakes up the idiot, who has the second shift. As he's coming to, the idiot rubs his head and finds he has no hair. "That barber is a right moron!" he exclaims, "He's got it all wrong and woken the bald man instead of me!"

(this joke from the Philogelos, is over a thousand years old

Why doesn't a keyboard sleep?

Because it has two shifts

I was fired from the keyboard factory yesterday...

...I wasn't putting in enough shifts.

With the situation in Ukraine...

Putin is giving a speech to his people
- My people, due Wests sanctions we'll need to tighten our belts and work harder!
Voice from the crowd:
- We will work two shifts!
- Thank you, you must be real patriot of our country! And we'll have to give up western goods and production!
- We will work three shifts!
- Such patriotism for country! By the way what's your occupation?
- I work at morgue...

My dad got fired from the keyboard factory yesterday

Apparently he wasn't putting enough shifts in

Why couldn't the laptop go to sleep?

Because it has two shifts.

Why does a keyboard work day and night?

Because it has two shifts!

Why are keyboards always tired?

They have 2 shifts

I was fired from the keyboard factory

I didn't put in enough shifts

I've got a part time job making rubberised computer keyboards.

They offer flexible shifts.

Got in our old Mark 1 Golf today...

... My dad grabs shifts into reverse and says...."Aah, this takes me back"

My laptop's keyboard really works too hard...

It has two SHIFTS

Do you know why keyboards are always so tired?

Coz they have two shifts.

My response any time my boss tells me they need people to help cover shifts this week:

That sounds like a personnel problem.

Typecasting

I just got fired from my job at the keyboard factory. They told me I wasn't putting in enough shifts.

I just got fired from my job at they keyboard factory

Apparently, I kept missing too many shifts.

There's a new exhibit planned in the next few days at the museum of revolutionary leaders said a press release

There are many leaders being honoured, from Pancho Villa to Simon Bolivar. To get the exhibit ready in record time, dedicated crews have been assigned to each figure, and they're all going to work double shifts, day and night.Well... almost all, there is one exception, you can only make Che when the sun shines.

What are the funniest shifts jokes of all time?

Did you ever wanted to stand out with a good sense of humour joking about Shifts? Well, here are the best Shifts puns to laugh out loud. Crazy and funny Shifts pick up lines to share with friends.

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