The Best 19 Shep Jokes

Following is our collection of Shep jokes which are very funny. There are some shep shepard jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud. Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these shep asleep puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Funny Shep Jokes and Puns

This farmer was telling me about how brilliant his sheepdog was at maths,

"Watch this," he said. "Shep, what's seven plus two, "
And the dog barked ten times.
"OK, Shep, what's fifteen plus four. "
And the dog barked twenty times.
"He's very good, " I replied, but he's a little over. "
"Yeah, " answered the farmer, "old habits die hard, he's just rounding them up. "

A shepard asks his dog

To count the sheep on his farm

The dog goes to count the sheep an comes back

The shepard asked how many sheep do i have?

The dog says 40

The shepard thinks " wait a minute i only had 38 how could that be.

The dog said

" i rounded them up"

A shepherd tells his dog to go count the sheep...

So the dog goes out, comes back a little later. Shepherd says: How many sheep you count out there?
Dog says: 40 .
Shepherd says: That's not possible, I only had 38 to begin with! .
And the dog goes: Yeah but I rounded them up .

A shepherd owned a remarkable dog, deft at sheep herding and able to speak.

At the end of the day, after his dog had herded the flock into the pen, the shepherd asked his canine friend to confirm how many sheep were in.

"40," the dog barked.

"40? I counted 37."

"Yes," replied the dog, "I rounded them up."

The shepherd woke up one afternoon...

"Oh no! I fell asleep! I hope nobody stole my sheep.

Let's see 1, 2, *Zzzzzz*"


Why did the shepherd sleep on the job?

Because he was busy counting sheep.

A shepherd was looking for a sheep that ran away

Forget it, you've already herd this one.

Why didn't the shepard cut off his sheep's wool?

Shear laziness.

Why do shepherds wear overalls?

Because sheep can hear zippers.

A Sheppard tried to take inventory

But he fell asleep when he tried

What did one shepherd say to the other shepherd?

Let's get the flock out of here.

You can explore shep shear reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean shep wool dad jokes. There are also shep puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


How do you get to Shepherds Bush?

Up the Shepherd's leg!

A Shepherd asks a Blacksmith, Can you help me find my sheep?

Blacksmith replies, That sounds like a ewe problem.

The shepherd counted 98 sheep...

As the shepherd said to his sheep

Let's get the flock out of here

Do you know why shepherds sleep only on their belly?

So no one will steal their cheese....

How does a shepherd integrate black and white flocks?

Ewe-substitution

A shepherd asked a depressed sheep how he was doing...

"Baaaaaahd," the sheep replied.

What did the Shepard say when he saw the sheep?

"I herd that!"


Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the shep laziness jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working shep cut piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes