Sheepishly Jokes
32 sheepishly jokes and hilarious sheepishly puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about sheepishly that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Sheepishly Short Jokes
Short sheepishly jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The sheepishly humour may include short reluctantly jokes also.
- I've just discovered a method for making wool out of milk.
But doesn't that make the cow feel a little sheepish?
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Sheepishly One Liners
Which sheepishly one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with sheepishly? I can suggest the ones about smugly and nervously.
- How did the nervous man feel after putting on his wool socks? Sheepish
- Why do Welshmen like to embarrass their wives? It makes them rather sheepish.
- How did the lamb tell the other lamb that it had a crush on her? Sheepishly.
- The Welsh are a very shy people They're really quite sheepish...
- I told my friend that his curly brown hair closely resembles wool. He looked sheepish.
- i dont date shepherds they're too sheepish
- Who was the most bashful vampire? Vlad Sheepish!
Witty Sheepishly Jokes for Laughter-Filled Fun with Friends
What funny jokes about sheepishly you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean seductively jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make sheepishly pranks.
My wife just gave birth today and after thanking the doctor, I pulled him aside and sheepishly asked, "How soon do you think we'll be able to have s**...?"
He winked at me and said, "I'm off duty in ten minutes - meet me in the car park."
LPT: How to pick up girls
Try this:
1. Acquire several dozen limes.
1. Go up to them and then drop all the limes.
1. Start picking them up, but keep dropping them. The clumsier you look the better.
1. Keep doing this until you have their attention (this could take up to thirty minutes).
1. Finally gather up the limes. Try looking a bit sheepish.
1. Look them deeply in the eyes and say, "Sorry, I'm bad at Pickup Limes."
A young man decided it was time to come out to his family.
He was worried most about his grandmother, so he approached her in the kitchen.
"Grandma, I, uh, have to tell you something."
"Yes, sweety?"
"I, uh, I'm gay."
"Gay?" His heart stopped. "Does that mean you put men's things in your mouth?"
"Grandma!!!!"
"Well??"
Mortified, he muttered sheepishly, "I, uh, yeah?"
Whack! The wooden spoon found its mark. "Don't you EVER," she sternly replied, "complain about my cooking again."
New Earring
John is at work one day when he notices that his
co-worker, Zach, is wearing an earring.
This man knows his co-worker to be a normally conservative fellow, and is curious about his sudden change in "fashion".
"Hey Zach" he yells out "I didn't know you were into earrings."
"Don't make such a big deal out of it, ..it's only an
earring." Says Zach sheepishly.
"No really," probes John, "How long have you been wearing one?"
... "Ever since my wife found it in our bed."
First Impressions
A young teenage couple have been dating for a little while, so the girl says to the boy that she wants him to meet her parents. He is a little skeptical at this, but she tells him that if he can make a good impression with them that she will reward him with s**....
Extremely excited at the prospect of losing his virginity, the boy rushes to the local pharmacy to get some protection. However, he is a little embarrassed and unsure of himself. The pharmacist at the counter notices this and walks over to see if he can help. "First time?" the pharmacist guesses. The boy nods sheepishly. So the pharmacist gives him the basics on picking condoms. The boy thanks him, buys some, and leaves.
Finally, the big night arrives and the boy arrives at the girl's house. As the couple and the girl's parents sit down for dinner, they all bow their heads to say grace over the meal. Afterwards, they all look up to start eating, except for the boy, who still has his head bowed in prayer. Respectfully, the girl and her parents sit quietly as he continues praying to himself. After about 5 minutes pass, the girl leans over and whispers to him, "I never knew you were so religious!" He looks up at her and whispers back, "I never knew your dad was a pharmacist!"
I calmly opened the door and said, Son, I found a c**... in your room. He looked up sheepishly and groaned, Thanks Grandpa.
Why did you call me Grandpa? I questioned.
He laughed nervously, Because I couldn't find it yesterday.
Some students notice an elderly couple in the McDonald's with only one meal on the table...
"Excuse me," says one of the students, "I noticed that you only have one meal between you. If you'd like we could get another for you, it's no trouble."
"That's very kind of you," replies the elderly woman, "but you see, in our marriage my husband and I share everything. This is enough food for both of us."
A few minutes later, the students again notice that the only elderly man is eating while his wife sits in still silence.
"Perhaps we could get that meal for you after all?" another student asks sheepishly. To which the woman replies:
"Oh no, it's fine. I'm waiting for my turn with the dentures."
My wife gave birth today, after she was stable and sleeping I thanked the Doctor, then sheepishly asked 'When we will be able to have s**...?'
He winked at me and said 'I knock off in 10 minutes, meet me in the car park'
GRANDPA'S CONDOMS
An old man finds a c**... in his grandson's apartment and asks what it is.
"It's a c**...," replies the grandson, sheepishly.
"What do you use it for?" asks Grandpa.
The grandson is embarrassed, so he says, "I use it to keep my cigarettes dry when I smoke in the rain."
Grandpa says, "That's a great idea." He goes to the drug store and asks the pharmacist for a c**....
"What size would you like?" asks the pharmacist.
"Big enough to fit a Camel."
A man is at work one day when he notices that his co-worker is wearing an earring...
The man knows his co-worker to be a normally conservative fellow, and is curious about his sudden change in "fashion sense".
The man walks up to him and says,
"I didn't know you were into earrings."
"Don't make such a big deal, it's only an earring," he replies sheepishly.
His friend falls silent for a few minutes, but then asks,
"So, how long have you been wearing one?"
"Ever since my wife found it in my truck."
A priest and a rabbi, old friends, are talking about their youthful indiscretions.
So the priest says, "tell me, have you ever tasted pork?"
The rabbi, slightly ashamed, admits: "Yes, once when I was young..."
After a thoughtful pause, the rabbi asks the priest, "tell me, have you ever made love to a woman?"
Sheepishly, the priest admits: "Yes, once when I was young."
The rabbi nods and says: "It was better than pork, wasn't it?"
A man walks into a library
And sheepishly asks the librarian behind the counter "excuse me, but do you have that new book for men with small p**...?".
The librarian acknowledges the request and starts typing away on her computer to check the database, she turns back to the man and says "It's not in yet..."
"That's the one!" The man says.
A man walks into a bar with a pork pie on his head.
The barman asks, "Why are you wearing a pork pie on your head?"
The man replies, "It's a family tradition. We always wear pork pies on our heads on Tuesday."
The barman remarks, "But it's Wednesday."
Sheepishly, the man says, "Man, I must look like a real fool."
Four teachers are talking in the staffroom
The English teacher said: "I had a particularly dim pupil today ask me what came after 'F', I made sure be kind when I told him it was 'G'"
The music teacher replied with "I think I taught the same boy, he must've been confused when I told him that naturally F sharp came after F."
The computer science teacher chimed in with "Interestingly I told him that 1 came after F since we're learning hex at the moment"
The PE teacher after quietly listening in sheepishly admits "I told him it's okay, you can always train to teach gym".
A r**... couple gets married and are on their honeymoon.
The woman changes into a s**... outfit and lies on the bed.
She looks sheepishly up at her new hubby and whispers, "Please be gentle with me. I'm a v**...."
The man gets up screaming, grabs his trousers and runs home to tell his father.
His father comforts him by saying, "Now, now. It'll be okay, son. If she wasn't good enough for her own family, then she isn't good enough for ours."
A man was driving to work when a truck ran a stop sign, hit his car broadside, and knocked him out cold.
A Passersby pulled him from the wreckage and revived him.
He began an Epic struggle and had to be tranquilized by the medics. Later, when he had calmed down, they asked him why he had struggled so.
He said, a bit sheepishly, "I remember the impact, then nothing. I woke up on a concrete slab in front of this huge, flashing sign. Turns out somebody was standing in front of the 'S' on the 'Shell' sign."
Stalin is attending the premiere of a Soviet comedy movie with his fellow Party members.
He laughs and grins throughout the film, but after it ends he says, "Well, I liked the comedy. But that clown had a moustache just like mine. Shoot him."
Everyone is speechless, until someone sheepishly suggests, "Comrade Stalin, maybe the actor shaves off his moustache?"
Stalin replies, "Good idea! First shave, then shoot!"
A husband and wife have been married for 20 years...
One day their 15 year old son approaches his Dad and sheepishly asks
"Dad, can I ask you a question about s**...?"
"Sure thing son, you can ask me anything."
"What does a b**... feel like?", the son says.
"Let me see if I can remember".
My best joke in 40 year of joke telling
A woman goes to her doctor for a check up. During the post check up consult the doctor says
Mrs. Jones you are in very good health but, I couldn't help but notice the abrasions on your elbows and knees. Can you tell me what is causing them?
Sheepishly she responds Maybe it is because I like to make love d**...
Well,, perhaps if you do it in the m**... for a few weeks it will alive the abrasion
She says I tried that but I can't stand the dog's breath .
