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So it's the weekend, and I'm on my back patio when I get this idea to call up my coroner friend Bob.

"Bob's not here," his wife says, "he's at work."

"Sheesh!" I think. "Poor guy doing autopsies on a Sunday."

So I call him on his cell.

"What gives, bro,?" I ask.

"h**...," he says. "The higher-ups need a report ASAP. I'll be starting in just a few minutes."

I Josh Bob a little. "I'll be thinking of you, buddy. Right now, I'm basting barbecue sauce on a rack of baby-backs and I'm getting ready to open a frosty beer."

"Not much different here," he says. "I'm about ready to crack open a cold one myself."



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