Shades Jokes
137 shades jokes and hilarious shades puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about shades that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Shades Short Jokes
Short shades jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The shades humour may include short shady jokes also.
- What do Green eggs and Ham and Fifty Shades of Grey have in common? They both encourage people who can barely read to try new things.
- I really wish some of the fantasies in 50 shades of grey were real... like how she got a job right out of college.
- I wish I could re-enact the fantasy scenes from 50 Shades of Grey... For example, the one where she gets a job right out of college.
- I want to repaint my room a shade of white... ...but I can't decide between "eggshell", "beige", or "2016 Oscars".
- Yesterday I saw a horse-drawn carriage The proportions were a bit off but the shading and linework were quite remarkable.
- 50 shades of grey would be a perfect title for a movie about a dog reading a map of the US.
- This week Lego Batman sold more tickets than the sequel to 50 Shades of Grey... When asked to comment about this 50 Shades stated "It's okay, I like to be dominated."
- My 8-Year old patient was so pround, mom was not. Q: What type of bees make milk?
A: BOO-Bees!
And then he just couldn't stop laughing. Mom turned 50 shades of red and blamed dad. Good times. - When my kindle reads Fifty Shades of Gray to me It's like getting an obscene phone call from Stephen Hawking
- I'm going on holiday to Egypt. A coworker told me it can get up to 100 degrees in the shade... ...I'll be staying out of the shade then.
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Shades One Liners
Which shades one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with shades? I can suggest the ones about sunglasses and dark shadows.
- My wife said she wanted to see 50 Shades of Grey. So I took a photo of her hair!
- You know why dolly parton has small feet? Nothing grows in the shade.
- Scientists have discovered a fantastic new shade of the colour green. Its sublime
- What's the most ordinary shade of yellow? Mediochre.
- I've just written a book called "Fifty Shades of Gravy" It's very saucy
- Why did the teacher wear shades in school? Because her pupils were too bright!
- Trees are really rude They're always throwing shade!
- Why was the Sun mad at all the clouds? Because they kept throwin shade
- What technique does a prisoner use when coloring a picture? Cell shading.
- What do trees do when they get mad at each other? Throw shade
- What are a lamp's favorite type of glasses? Shades!
- Did you know Michael Jacksons curtains lit on fire? He was shades lighter after that...
- 50 SHADES ADMISSION 82% of women have admitted to reading 50 Shades of Grey with one hand
- How do you make your wife scream after s**...? Wipe your d**... on the curtain.
- What shade of orange is okay, but not great? Mediochre
Shades Grey Jokes
Here is a list of funny shades grey jokes and even better shades grey puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- I'm starting the dishes, and my wife is getting ready to go watch 50 Shades of Grey I guess you could say we are BOTH pre soaking.
- 50 shades of grey Girl 1: Hey have you read yet?
Girl 2: Yes! From cover to cover!
Girl 1: And the index?
Girl 2: Exhausted... - 50 shades of grey is a genius title but had they thought about it They should have added 19 more shades
- Fifty Shades of Grey beat the record for fastest selling R-rated movie in history... Well, first it tied the record... then it beat it....
[credit goes to the Late Night with Seth Meyers writers] - What do you call someone who has watched all the "Shades of Grey" movies? A glutton for punishment...
- I was so excited. My wife said she wanted to live the life of 50 Shades of Grey ... Then she stopped dyeing her hair.
- I was gunna write the great American nursing home romance novel... ....but the title "50 Shades of Grey" was already taken.
- 50 shades of grey broke a lot of box office records for R-rated movies… Well first it tied them, then it beat them.
- I think it's only fair the week after Black Friday be called White Friday And then with the remaining Fridays before the next Black Friday, you can have fifty shades of grey.
- Why did the characters from Fifty Shades of Grey get into a fight about fast food? They couldn't agree where to go. Christian wanted Domino's, but Ana insisted on Subway!
50 Shades Jokes
Here is a list of funny 50 shades jokes and even better 50 shades puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- I want to reenact a scene from 50 Shades of Gray.... Y'know the one where she gets a job right out of college.
- Television was never really black and white before color It was basically just 50 shades of gray
- Whats's Wolverine's favoirte book? 50 Shades of Jean Grey
- What book does the Queen of England read to get herself into a raunchy mood? 50 Shades of Earl Grey
- There's one fantasy scene in 50 Shades of Grey that I'd love to be part of in real life... ...specifically, the part where the protagonist gets a job straight out of college.
- What's Mrs. Clause's favorite romance novel? 50 shades of sleigh.
- Ever since they brought out a movie based on the book... ... it's impossible to tell if girls are referring to the movie or the book when they say 'I was just flicking through 50 Shades of Grey.'
- What do you get if you cross 50 Shades of Grey with Blurred Lines? A greydient
- What kind of headphones are sold in 50 shades of grey? Beats
- 50 Shades of Gray I'm not really interested in watching that film. In order to make me see it, someone would literally have to tie me up and drag me there.
Fifty Shades Of Grey Jokes
Here is a list of funny fifty shades of grey jokes and even better fifty shades of grey puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- What kind of person can't stop watching 'Fifty Shades of Grey'? A colorblind synaesthesiac listening to the radio
- In art class, I saw my friend making a gradient from dark to light on his paper with his pencil today. "Hey, what are you doing?"
"Illustrating Fifty Shades of Grey..." - "Fifty Shades of Grey" gives its readers unrealistic expectations. It makes them think that Vintage Books will publish anything that gets sent to them.
- What do new car colours and your mom's literary collection have in common? They both only have fifty shades of grey.
- Why does Bruce Banner have Fifty Shades of Grey on his iPhone? Because he needs something to get him angry enough to turn him into the Hulk on short notice.
- Fifty Shades of Grey: Dog Edition Dog Anastasia's Friend: "How did the interview go?"
Dog Anastasia: "Didn't even happen. I just couldn't figure out which one was Mr Grey" - My girlfriend wanted to act out a scene from Fifty Shades of Grey It was the scene where Christian wanted to buy Anastasia a new Audi...
- Did you hear, Henry Winker is directing the new Fifty Shades of Grey Sequel? Yeah, it comes out next year. It's called Fifty Shades of Aaaaayyy!
- I asked the girl I've been dating to see Fifty Shades of Grey with me this weekend, but I think she's worried were moving too fast. She seemed concerned and said she didn't want to be tied down.
- A blind man walks into a Fifty Shades of Grey theater takes a deep breath and says " MMM ... I guess I'm at a fish market"
Shades Green Jokes
Here is a list of funny shades green jokes and even better shades green puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- 50 Fifty Shades of Green

Charming Humor Shades Jokes with Loads of Fun
What funny jokes about shades you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean curtains jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make shades pranks.
Apple and Fifty Shades of Gray are popular for the same reason ...
... they both offer the fantasy of being dominated by a rich guy, who pushes the boundarys of what you though you were into.
What does Eminem call his window blinds?
Slim Shad-Es
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Lenin,Stalin and Gorbachev were riding on a train...
When it came to a halt,the engineer said,"Our engine has failed,What shall i do?"."Let the invincible spirit of the people pulls us on!" Lenin declared."Shoot the engineer!" offered Stalin.And Gorbachev suggested, "Close the shades and we can pretend we're moving forward."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Did you hear The Fonz wrote an e**... novel?
It's called 50 Shades of Eyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy
Which gospel contains Jesus' parable about the shades of numbers?
Math hue.
Should I bring a box of tissues to the new 'Fifty Shades of Grey' film?
I hear it's very sad.
Would it be awesome if Fifty Shades movie will get...
69% on rottentomatoes?
Experts are predicting a very wet day tomorrow...
They are urging cinemas showing 50 shades of grey to brace themselves.
If 50 Shades of Grey were in the NFL...
...it'd be on the Commissioner's Exempt list.
Fifty Shades of Grey.
I hear that when you go see Fifty Shades of Grey, some theaters, to go along with the theme of the film, will tie moviegoers to their chairs. It has been determined that the real reason for this is that it is the only way to get people to sit through the entire movie.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
My wife says we should spice up our s**... life with some stuff from 50 Shades of Gray.
First, she wants me to become a billionaire.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
50 Shades of Little Johnny
Johnny's Mum was cleaning under his bed when she found a stash of b**... magazines.
A bit concerned she asks Johnny's Dad what he thinks she should do.
Johnny's Dad responds "whatever else you do, don't s**... him"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Forty minutes before we get to the first s**... scene in Fifty Shades Of Grey?
They do beat around the bush...
I heard they were gonna make a movie about Michael Jackson
It was gonna be titled "50 Shades of Black".
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
After reading, 50 shades of grey, my wife asked to treat her like Anastasia
... so I got the Bolshevik secret police to m**... her family and I sold her to a Russian pig farmer.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
50 Shades
He slowly but firmly grabs my t**.... I try to say goodbye and I choke. I try to walk away and I stumble...'
- of Macy Gray.
A man is asked why he can't see the Fifty Shades of Gray movie...
He replies, "I'm color blind and can only see 36 of them."
Got kicked out of Barnes and Noble for moving the "Caution Wet Floor" sign to the Fifty Shades of Gray aisle.
Man goes into a hardware store...
Says to the shopkeeper, "Can I have a roll of masking tape and some zip ties"
Shopkeeper smiles knowingly, "I'm sorry, thanks to the 50 Shades of Gray film we're out of stock"
The man winces and replies, "OK, just give me a chainsaw and some bin bags"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
My wife made me go to a b**... book reading today with whole families and children.
I think the book was called fifty shades of Christ.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Colorblind people are wondering why is everyone on Facebook is celebrating Fifty Shades of Grey
Manatees come in all sorts of shades and hues
Oh the hue manatee
Literary alcohol puns
I saw someone post some the other day. Has anyone thought of any new ones?
Here are a couple my friends and I thought of...
50 Shades of Grey Goose,
Into the Wild Turkey,
Beer and Present Danger,
Patriot Drinking Games,
The Sum of All Beers (I like Tom Clancy),
The Red Badge of Liquid Courage.
They're watching...
I was in my bathroom earlier and I heard weird noises coming from the sink.
Then, I walked to the upstairs window and noticed a man dressed in an all black suit with black shades, suspiciously walking around outside in the car park.
Beginning to think that someone might be phoning my taps.
What book does a gay horse read?
50 Shades of HaaAAaaayyy.
My son can only see in shades of beige,
Doctors have diagnosed him with colour-blandness.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Do you want to satisfy your h**... food f**...?
Buy my new book: 50 Shades of Grey Poupon
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Going To The Movies
I told my wife I wanted to watch a movie about a billionaire p**... with a penchant for darkness, inflicting violence and dressing up in masks.
She got excited and asked, "Are we really go to see *50 Shades*?"
I laughed and told her I was talking about *The Lego Batman Movie*.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do you call a multi-cultural, homosexual convention?
50 Shades of Gay
I turned on the TV, and it was static
My wife asked me, "what's that noise?" I said "fifty shades of gray"
I pranked my friend by coloring their face 3 different shades of blue in their sleep.
huehuehue.
My room is really dark, I think my window shades work too well...
I think they deserve a raise.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What is the equine book on b**... entitled?
Fifty Shades of Neigh
Have you heard they are make Fifty Shades of Red movie?
I heard its a period piece.
What movie are people coming early to?
Fifty Shades Freed.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What would a book on b**... culture written in alabama be called?
Fifty Shades of Hay.
Julie Andrews withdraws her endorsement
Julie Andrews will no longer be endorsing Revlon Vibrant Shades lipstick, as she claims it breaks too easily and makes her breath smell.
In a statement she said, "The super color fragile lipstick gives me halitosis."
What's the deal with lamp shades??
If you want a lamp, why do you need shade??
I remember doing a book report in elementary school on, "Fifty Shades of Grey".
I got a B+ and the teacher left a note saying, "thank god you didn't actually read the book, though I loved your creativity stating Christian Grey had 49 other clones".
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Fifty Shades of Grey has no plot.
It's just all c**....
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Occupied with taking the virginity of virgins There is so much s**... in the Quran, hadiths and tafsirs,
you'll forget 50 shades of grey
[36:55]
So i was thinking of making a documentary on SoundCloud Rappers...
I was gonna call it "Fifty Shades of AYE"

