September Jokes

75 september jokes and hilarious september puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about september that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

If you're looking for a good laugh, look no further than September jokes. From clean jokes to silly puns, there's something for everyone. So curl up with a good cup of coffee and enjoy a few laughs.

Best Short September Jokes

Short september jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The september humour may include short autumn jokes also.

  1. I hate that September, October, November, and December are somehow the 9th, 10th, 11th, and 12th months of the calendar year Whoever messed that up ought to be stabbed
  2. On September 11, 2001, I was in geometry class. On that day, we learned you can remove one side of a pentagon by intersecting it with a plane.
  3. George Bush started cracking a 9/11 joke, but one of his advisors whispered, Too soon. It was September 10th.
  4. September was the first calendar month no nfl players were arrested in six years. Kudos to their wives for being so well behaved last month.
  5. Really hate having to wait till September to drive my new car. Shouldn't have bought an autumnobile.
  6. How many seconds are there in one year? 12 of them: January 2nd, February 2nd, March 2nd, April 2nd, May 2nd, June 2nd, July 2nd, august 2nd, September 2nd, October 2nd, November 2nd, December 2nd.
  7. If you were born in September It's safe to assume that your parents started their new year with a bang !
  8. What did the detective in the Arctic say to the suspect? "Where were you on the night of September to March?"
  9. National Pride Day should be September 21 September 22 is the first day of Autumn, and as everyone knows, Pride goes before a Fall.
  10. Last September my wife asked me to put a load in the dishwasher. So long story short, happy fathers day to me.

Quick Jump To

September joke, Last September my wife asked me to put a load in the dishwasher.

Make fun with this list of one liners, jokes and riddles. Each joke is crafted with thought and creativity, delivering punchlines that are unexpected and witty. The humor about september can easily lighten the mood and bring smiles to people's faces. This compilation of september puns is not just entertaining but also a testament to the art of joke-telling. The jokes in this list are designed to display different humor styles, ensuring that every reader at any age finds something entertaining. Constantly updated, they offer a source of fun that ensures one is always smiling !

Share These September Jokes With Friends

September One Liners

Which september one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with september? I can suggest the ones about fall and thanksgiving.

  1. i hope people on September 2nd 1885 were flipping out on Back to the Future Part III day
  2. Pride Month should be celebrated in September. As we know, Pride cometh before the Fall.
  3. I want to get married on September 11th... That way I'll never forget my anniversary
  4. Please, don't get Covid-19 They are releasing Covid-20 in September and it's much better.
  5. if you were born in September… your parents started off the new year with a bang
  6. What does the Chicago Cubs's name stand for? Completely Useless By September
  7. Why do pirates have trouble learning the alphabet? Because they spend years at Sea!
  8. September is alzheimers awareness month Did anyone else forget?
  9. I'm a narcoleptic Green Day fanatic, Wake me up when September ends.
  10. September is Alzheimer's awareness month Never forget
  11. Guys, please don't forget to wake up Green Day tonight. September is ending.
  12. TIL that narcissistic behavior tends to peak in mid-September. Pride goeth before a fall.
  13. September 8, 1999 is the release date of American Beauty. It turned legal this year
  14. "My body, my choice" -Hilary Clinton, 11 September 2016
  15. My prediction for December 21, 2012 Many babies will be born on September 21, 2013

Wake Me Up When September Ends Jokes

Here is a list of funny wake me up when september ends jokes and even better wake me up when september ends puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • Somebody needs to wake up Billy Joe Armstong today. "Wake me up when September ends..."
    ~Green Day
  • What did the Green Day fan say to the Earth, Wind, and Fire fan who wanted to play his his long list of music? Wake me up when 'September' ends
  • I'm feeling a bit tired. Wake me up when September ends.
  • Did someone wake up Green Day? September ended.
  • Okay Google, wake me up when September ends. I think I just killed my phone.
  • I'm going to take a nap... Wake me up when September ends.

September 11th Jokes

Here is a list of funny september 11th jokes and even better september 11th puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • I scheduled my wisdom tooth extraction for September 11th... I know there's a joke in here somewhere but I can't find it. Help me out?
  • Uh oh! Guess what day it is! GUESS. WHAT. DAY. IT. IS. It's September 11th.. you said you'd never forget!
  • Chuck Norris Used To Love Launching Paper Planes, But He Has Stopped It After September, 11th 2001
  • I almost didn't remember today was September 11th Then I felt bad, because I said I'd never forget.
  • Hey babe. Want to hook up? I'm like September 11th... You'll never forget.

September 1st Jokes

Here is a list of funny september 1st jokes and even better september 1st puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • September 1st Never forget
September joke, September 1st

Howlingly Hilarious September Jokes for an Unforgettable Evening

What funny jokes about september you can tell and make people laugh? One example I can give are clean fireworks jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help make september prank.

"Having too much s**... can result in memory loss."

I read that on page 37, paragraph five of the New England Medical Journal on September 15th, 2014 at 10:37 am.

Jenga Towers

At Highschool we have a test every week and my teacher lets the person with the highest score bring in their favourite board game. For years, my favourite game has been Jenga, the falling towers game.
So on friday the 8th in the first week of September I finally get the highest score and the teacher tells me I can bring in a board game on monday.
mfw I walk into class on 9/11 with Jenga and I'm a muslim...

Not sure what you have heard, but it actually only rains twice a year in Seattle.

October through May, then June through September.

One of my friends maintains that tomorrow doesn't come until you've have 8 hours of uninterrupted sleep.

He also maintains that it's September 7th, 1998.

My girlfriend of 5 years asked me...

My girlfriend of 5 years asked me when was the last time I had s**... with someone before her.

I said "back in '09". It sounds much better than saying September.

Offensive joke I thought of in class

Me and my friend were talking about the last time he has to work at his job.
"Yeah my last day of work is September 11"
I reply " Yeah that was a lot of other people's last day of work too"

A businessman wakes up from a coma

"What happened?" The businessman asks the nurse who was in his room.
"Sir, you have been in a coma ever since the September 1, 1939. Your whole family has been dead for many years, your company has filed for bankruptcy and now you have no money left in the bank"
"Ah, that's okay as long as I can still see my favorite 6 million jews!"

Your lucky if you were born in September...

Because your parents started the new year with a bang.

Were you born on September?

If so, it's pretty obvious your parents started their New Year with a bang ;)

If you're born in September...

...that means your parents started out the New Year with a bang

My buddy is getting married.

The date is set for September, 9th. I told him to push it back two days so he'll never forget.

The people who are born in September are really awesome

Their parents started their new year with a BANG!


A man wokring at the World Trade Center calls out sick on the day of September 11th 2001. He turns on the TV and sees the news. His wife yells to him and comes down to watch it with him. "Thats terrible honey, is your boss working today." "God I hope so" he replies

10 september 2001

The child of Bin Laden comes home grumpy. His dad asks him "what happened?". "Today I got an F in geography class". "And what did she ask you?". "What's the tallest building from New York and I said Empire State Building". "Eh, don't cry over it, I'll take care of that for you."

James A. Garfield was shot on Saturday, July 2, 1881.

He died months later, on Monday, September 19, 1881.
Garfield hates Mondays.

If you were born on the September 16th, you were more than likely conceived on Christmas Day.

I was actually born on September 15th, so Christmas came early for my mum.

There was a computers and technology fair on the 10th of September...

I arrived at the venue but they all looked at me confused. They told me the fair was 8 days ago. Ridiculous!

My six-year old just got pregnant!

She's a Labrador Beagle Mix, and she'll be having a litter of puppies in September!

Last week we had an earthquake, a hurricane, and a LITERAL serpentine fire so, on this auspicious day, I'd just like to say:

OK, Earth Wind & Fire...

I carve all my pumpkins in September.

I suffer with p**... ejackolantern

If you were born in September.....

it's pretty safe to assume that your parents started their new year with a bang.

A death toll too high to imagine

On September 29th 2006 President George W. Bush receives a briefing from one of his staff
"Mr. President, we've just received reports of a commercial plane c**... in south America, 154 Brazilian people died."
"Oh my God, that's terrible..." The president replies solemnly, thinking quietly to himself.
"Wait... How much is a Brazilian?"

What do you call carving a pumpkin in September?

p**... ejackolantern

Buckingham Palace say the Queen will interrupt her annual stay in Balmoral in Scotland to hold an audience with the incoming new prime minister.

Creaking a bit, with limited mobility, but still doggedly in charge, the Tory party gets its new leader on September 5th.

Did you know the original Gregorian calendar had different months?

January = Greg
February = Ian
March = Greg
April = Ian
May = Ian
June = Greg
July = Ian
August = Greg
September = Greg
October = Ian
November = Greg
December = Ian

September joke, if you were born in September…

jokes about september

Jokes are a form of humor that often involves clever wordplay, puns or unexpected twists in a story. These are usually short narratives or anecdotes crafted with the intent of amusing its audience by ending in an unexpected or humorous punchline. Jokes are a universal form of entertainment that people of all ages like adults, teens, kids and toddlers can enjoy. JokoJokes' FAQ section has answers to questions you may have!

The impact of these september jokes can be both social and psychological. They can help to ease tensions, create bonds between people, and even improve overall mental health. The success of a joke often relies on the delivery, timing, and audience. Jokes can be used in various settings, from social gatherings to professional presentations, and are often employed to lighten the mood or enhance a story.