The Best 77 Sentence Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Sentence jokes. There are some sentence smee jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these sentence use in a sentence puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 Funniest Sentence Jokes and Puns

So Tekashi69 could face life in prison

Which is nice because we might finally get to see a mumble rapper completing a sentence

Teacher: Johnny, give me a sentence with an "i" in it.

Teacher: Johnny, give me a sentence with an 'i' in it.

Johnny: I is...

Teacher: No, Johnny, when you say 'i', it should be followed by 'am'

Johnny: Okay, I am the 9th letter of the alphabet

A colon in a sentence can make a huge difference

For example:

Johnny ate his own lunch after school.

Johnny ate his own colon after school.

[At a parole hearing] Officer: Tell me, why should you be released early?

Inmate: It's bec..

Officer: Yes?

Inmate: I think I have..

Officer: Go on.

Inmate: Can I Please finish my sentence?

Officer: Sure. Parole denied.

jokes about sentence

My brother who has a stutter is in prison.

It's just heartbreaking knowing he will never finish his sentence.


A coma in a sentence can literally change everything. For example:

*Ben is in a hurry.*

*Ben is in a coma.*

Prison may be just one word

But to others, it's a whole sentence

Sentence joke, Prison may be just one word

A visitor to Harvard asks a professor...

A visitor to Harvard asks a professor, "Excuse me, but would you be good enough to tell me where the Harvard Library is at?"

"Sir," came the sneering reply, "at Harvard we do not end a sentence with a preposition."

"Well, in that case, forgive me," said the visitor. "Permit me to rephrase my question. Would you be good enough to tell me where the Harvard Library is at, jackass?"

Why was the ink blot upset?

Because his father was in the pen and he didn't know how long the sentence would be.

Is Google a woman?

I can't even finish a sentence without it coming up with other suggestions.

Teacher: Paul. Give me a sentence beginning with "I".

Teacher: Paul. Give me a sentence beginning with "I".
Paul: I is the...

Teacher: No, Paul . You must say "I am" not "I is."
Paul: All right. I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.

You can explore sentence punishment reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean sentence imprison dad jokes. There are also sentence puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


*Teacher to Student* T: "Use the word 'centimeter' in a sentence"

S: "My grandma was arriving at the train station so i was centimeter"

T: "No, no, that's 'Sent to meet her'. Okay, try another one. Use 'contagious' in a sentence please"

S: "I had to wait at the train station for hours because it took that contagious!"

Capitalization can really change a sentence.

For example:
I love to eat candy.
I love to eat capitalization.

Why was the little ink drop crying?

His mother was in the pen and he didn't know how long the sentence would be.

I wanted to marry my English teacher when she got out of prison...

...but apparently you can't end a sentence with a proposition.

What has 6 letters, starts with 'P', and ends a sentence?

Parole.

Sentence joke, What has 6 letters, starts with 'P', and ends a sentence?

Comas make a big difference in a sentence.

For example,

Ben is in a hurry.

Ben is in a coma.

Court decision: "I hereby find you guilty of clickbait, and sentence you to death by electric chair......

....what happens next will shock you."

Comas can really change the meaning of a sentence...

For instance:
"Ben is in a hurry."
"Ben is in a coma."


Sometimes it is very important if a sentence was said by a man or a woman...

Sometimes it is very important if a sentence was said by a man or a woman.

A good example: I used a whole pack of tissues during that awesome movie yesterday!

A teacher asks her class to use 'contagious' in a sentence

A teacher asks her class to use the word 'contagious' in a sentence. Sally, the class genius, raises her hand and says, "Last year I got the mumps, and my mom said it was contagious."

"Very good," says the teacher. "Would anyone else like to try?"

Little Johnny raises his hand and stands to give his answer.

"Our mean next door neighbor was painting her house by hand, and my dad said it would take the contagious.

I think Google's a woman...

Because it won't let you finish a sentence without coming up with other suggestions.

A man has been found guilty of overusing commas

The judge warned him to expect a very long sentence.

Why did Obama get two terms?

Because black men always get a longer sentence

A black guy, a white guy, and a Mexican guy were eying a hot chick from across a bar.

She notices them looking at her, so she walks up to them.She says, " I want a man that"s smart. Use the words LIVER and CHEESE in one sentence. "The black guy goes " I love to eat liver and cheese. "The white guy goes " I like to cook liver and cheese. "The Mexican guy goes up to the girl and tells the guys " Liver alone, cheese mine!!"

Scientists have deciphered hieroglyphics thought to be 5,500 years old. The first full sentence says

"This is a repost."

Sentence joke, Scientists have deciphered hieroglyphics thought to be 5,500 years old. The first full sentence says

Commas can change the meaning of a sentence.

Example:

I like to eat apples. ---> I like to eat commas.

Punctuation can really change a sentence. For example, "Let's eat kids" becomes

"Let's eat punctuation"

Teacher asks class: "use the word Dandelion in a sentence"

Teacher asks class: "use the word Dandelion in a sentence"

Jamaican student: "the cheetah is faster dandelion"

*Everyone dies*


Is Google a boy or girl?

Girl because it won't let you finish your sentence without suggesting other ideas

Rape...

Short word.
Long sentence.

Comas can change the meaning of a sentence.

For example:

"Donald is in a hurry."

"Donald is in a coma."

At the spelling bee

Judge: Your word is "there."

Me: In a sentence please.

Judge: They're parking their car over there.

Teacher: tell me a sentence that starts with an "I"

Teacher: tell me a sentence that starts with an "I"

Student: I is the...

Teacher: stop! Never put 'is' after an "I". Always put 'am' after an "I".

Student: okay! I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.


is google male or female?

female: because it refuses to let me finish a sentence before making suggestions

Police have arrested the World tongue-twister Champion.

I imagine he'll be given a tough sentence.

A guy with a stutter died in prison

before he could finish his sentence.

A school teacher in Hyderabad was once asked, "Can you make a sentence without using 'E'?"

"I doubt I can. It's a major part of many many words. Omitting it is as hard as making muffins without flour. It's as hard as spitting without saliva, napping without a pillow, driving a train without tracks, sailing to Russia without a boat, washing your hands without soap. And, anyway, what would I gain? An award? A cash bonus? Bragging rights? Why should I strain my brain? It's not worth it."

The world tongue-twister champion just got arrested

I hear they're gonna give him a really tough sentence.

The use of capitals can really change the meaning of a sentence

Example:

I like to eat candy

I like to eat capitals

A professor in South Africa is teaching her students how to form Emglish sentences.

Attention class I have two words: Cheetah, and dandelion. Can anybody use these together in a sentence?

One student raises their hand,

The cheetah is faster dandelion.

Daughter: What does gays mean?

Me: Well you know mum and dad love each other - two men can love each other the same way

Her: So what's 'penetrating gays'?

Me: Er... read me the whole sentence

Her: "She stared at him with a penetrating gaze"

Me: Oh

The use of a colon can really change the intended meaning of a sentence.

Jimmy went to school and ate his lunch

becomes

Jimmy went to school and ate his colon

Teacher: Use a sentence that starts with "I"

Bobby: I is...

Teacher: No, Bobby. You should say "I am", never "I is".

Bobby: I am the 9th letter of the alphabet.

If 6ix9ine serves his 47 years...

he'll be the first mumble rapper to finish a sentence

In an elementary school English class, kids are learning the word contagious . Teacher calls on students, asking them to use it in a sentence.

- Susan?

- I had a flu and mommy made me stay home for 3 days because I was contagious!

- Very good. What about you, Johnny?

- Our neighbor Mrs. Henderson has started painting her fence last night, daddy says it's gonna take the contagious!

A man is on is death sentence and he gets to choose his last meal

He asks his guard for a McDonald's Ice Cream, and lives a very long life, they never found a working machine.

A man noticed that his friend only smoked two cigarettes at a time.

He asked him about it and his friend said: "one for me and one on my imprisoned brother's behalf. He told me to smoke for him too"

Years later, the man saw his friend smoking only one cigarette, he told him: "I'm guessing good news! Your brother finished his sentence?"

His friend said: "No, I quit smoking"

Racism

Sometimes if I wanna get someone's attention, I'll start a sentence with "I'm not racist,
"I'm not racist, but you look great today."

And they say, "that wasn't racist at all."

And I say, "I know. I said I'm not racist. You never listen. Typical Mexican."

"The word of the day is 'contagious'" Said the teacher, "Who can use it in a sentence?"

Little Jenny stood up and said "My dad has a cold and said its contagious"

The teacher praised Jenny and ask for an example from another student.

Billy stood up and said "Miss, my mum has the flu, and I think its contagious"

Happy with Billy's response, the teacher asked for one more student to stand up and give an example.



Little Johnny stood up...

"Miss, my next door neighbour is painting his house with a 1 inch brush and my dad said its going to take the contagious."

At the parole hearing, the officer asked, "Tell me, why should you be released early?" The inmate responded, "It's bec..."

Officer: Yes?

Inmate: I think I have..

Officer: Go on.

Inmate: Can I Please finish my sentence?

Officer: Sure. Parole denied.

A prisoner slipped on the stairs 5 years into his 14 year sentence.

He suffered some minor injuries but he decided to pretend to be in a coma for rest of his sentence.

When he finally decided to drop the act on the last day of his sentence, the warden arrested him again, because you aren't supposed to end a sentence with a coma.

A man walks into an Indian restaurant.

The waiter asks, have you ever ordered here before?

The man replies, No, I haven't.

The waiter continues, We're a little different here. Before you order, I need you read and sign this form, and he hands a piece of paper to the man.

The man squints at the paper and reads the single sentence, We have naan at this restaurant. The man looked up, puzzled, and asked why he needed to sign this worthless statement.

The waiter replied, impatiently, Just sign the naan disclosure agreement and we can move on.

At the parole hearing, the officer asked, "Tell me, why should you be released early?"

Inmate: it's bec..

Officer: Yes?

Inmate: I think i have..

Officer: Go on.

Inmate: Can i please finish my sentence?

Officer: Sure. Parole denied.

I want Donald Trump to be my parole officer...

...he never lets anybody finish a sentence.

A husky, a pitbull, and a chihuahua are all fighting over a poodle.

Poodle says: "I'll only choose the mate who can use the words 'Liver' and 'Cheese' in one sentence..."

Husky: "Well that's easy, I love liver and I love cheese!"

Poodle: "That's not gonna work"

Pitbull: "I hate liver and I hate cheese!"

Poodle: "...No"

Chihuahua: "LIVER ALONE, CHEESE MINE!"

My buddy got arrested on drug charges and because it was his first offense, he thought he would get off lightly, but it turned out his lawyer was one of the worst in the state and ended up botching his case, so instead of getting a short term, he ended up getting 40 years without parole!!

Man, that sentence was way too long.

A colon can completely change the meaning of a sentence. For example:

- Jane ate her friend's sandwich.

-
- - Jane ate her friend's colon.

The judge asked the woman what she stole. She replied, I stole a can of peaches.

The judge then asked, how many peaches were in the can?

Six, replied the woman.

After consideration, the judge decided to sentence her one night of prison for every peach she stole. Six nights total.

At this moment the woman felt helpless, bawling her eyes out, she didn't know what to do.

And before the judge smacked the mallet down to make it final, her husband entered into the courtroom and yelled, your honor, wait!

The judge froze and listened to what the husband wanted to say.

She also stole a can of peas!

My crush told me that I'm pretty.

Well, the whole sentence was "you're pretty annoying", but I focus only on the positive things.

A British Jew is waiting in line to be knighted by the Queen.

He is to kneel in front of her and recite a sentence in Latin when she taps him on the shoulders with her sword. However, when his turn comes, he panics in the excitement of the moment and forgets the Latin. Then, thinking fast, he recites the only other sentence he knows in a foreign language, which he remembers from the Passover seder:

"Ma nishtanah halailah hazeh mikol haleilot."

Puzzled, Her Majesty turns to her advisor and whispers, "Why is this knight different from all other knights?"

I wanted to marry my English teacher when she got out of jail

But apparently you can't end a sentence with a proposition.

Where do bad rainbows go?

Prism

Only a light sentence

"Dad, what does 'gays' mean?"

Me: You know how mum and dad love each
other? Well, two men can love each other the same
way.

Daughter: So what is 'penetrating gays'?

Me: Er.. read me the whole sentence.

Her: "She stared at him with a penetrating gaze."

Me: Oh.

Accordion to a recent survey, 7 out of 10 people don't notice when a word in a sentence is replaced

by a musical instrument.

I wanted to marry my English teacher when she got out of jail.

But apparently you're not allowed to end a sentence with a proposition.

A lawyer defending a man accused of burglary tried this creative defense:

"My client merely inserted his arm into the window and removed a few trifling articles. His arm is not himself, and I fail to see how you can punish the whole individual for an offense committed by his limb."

"Well put," the judge replied. "Using your logic, I sentence the defendant's arm to one year's imprisonment. He can accompany it or not, as he chooses."

The defendant smiled. With his lawyer's assistance he detached his artificial limb, laid it on the bench, and walked out.

Teacher: Give me a sentence which includes the words, Defence, Defeat, Detail.

Teacher: Give me a sentence which includes the words, Defence, Defeat, Detail.

Charlie: When a horse jumps over defence, defeat go first and then detail.

During English class the teacher asks Little Johnny "have you ever heard of the word contagious before?"

"Of course miss" Johnny replies "my father actually said it when we were talking yesterday".

"Can you repeat it for the class and tell us how he used it in a sentence?"

"Yes, miss. We were watching the neighbour take his garbage out when his bin tipped over spilling rubbish all over the driveway, dad said 'it's going to take the contagious to pick all that up.

The shortest sentence in the English language is also the longest

I do

A Russian man shouting

A Russian man is walking around on the Red Square and shouting "Brezhnev is an idiot! Brezhnev is an idiot!"


He gets arrested. The sentence comes: 25 years. 1 for disturbing the peace and 24 for unauthorized release of classified information.

I created a new unit of measure for the distance between you and the nearest large, predatory cat. It's called a weem.

Used in a sentence, "That lion is a weem away"

A weem away
A weem away

The last sentence spoken before the end of the universe was by a scientist

it was something like: "*let's try this and see how it goes!*"

The perpetrator killed the victim by keeping him in a temperature chamber set to 1C

The sentence was first degree murder.

A new prisoner in the gulag is asked.....

"So how long are you in for?"

He replies, "Twenty years." The veteran prisoner is surprised: "Twenty?? What on earth could you have done?" The new man replies indignantly, "I did nothing, comrade! Honest!"

The veteran says, "But the sentence for doing nothing is only ten years."

Judge: "Lady, you shoplifted a can of tomatoes, so I sentence you to four weeks in prison, one for each tomato."

Lady's husband: "Your honour, don't forget she also stole a can of peas."

When do women in prison get their period?

At the end of their sentence.

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the sentence one sentence puns are supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working sentence use words in a sentence piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

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