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Sensitive Jokes

109 sensitive jokes and hilarious sensitive puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about sensitive that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Does telling a joke that offends a sensitive person make you a problematic comedian? Find out how to judge when a joke is reasonable or unreasonable and what to do if you feel vulnerable or squeamish when jokes don't land.

Funniest Sensitive Short Jokes

Short sensitive jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The sensitive humour may include short touchy jokes also.

  1. Genders are like the twin Towers There used to be two of them and now its a really sensitive subject.
  2. When my dentist reminded me about my wife's sensitive gag reflex, we laughed and laughed about it for a while... Then I remembered...................me and my wife have different dentists…
  3. What is the most sensitive part of your body while pleasuring yourself? Your ear listening for foot steps.
  4. Genders are like the twin tower There used to be two of them, now it's a sensitive subject
  5. Talking about Genders is a lot like the World Trade centers. There were 2 of them now it's a sensitive subject.
  6. I told a girl she would look better with her hair back and she got really offended. Chemo patients are so sensitive.
  7. People are so sensitive now-a-days. People are so sensitive now-a-days. You can't even say black paint. Instead you gotta say, Jamal, will you please paint the fence?
  8. I asked the grammar police about a crime in the capital... They told me that case was sensitive.
  9. Genders are like the twin towers There used to be 2 of them, but now it is a sensitive topic.
  10. Talking about gender is like talking about the twintowers... Once there were two and now its a sensitive topic.

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Sensitive One Liners

Which sensitive one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with sensitive? I can suggest the ones about delicate and fragile.

  1. Why are seismologists so hard to get along with? Because they're sensitive to a fault.
  2. I'm very sensitive to sounds of a certain frequency. When I hear them it hertz.
  3. With all Gillette drama said and done I guess it really wasn't meant for sensitive skin
  4. Did you hear about the sensitive robber? He takes things personally.
  5. My extra sensitive toothpaste ... doesn't like it when I use other toothpastes.
  6. Have you heard about the sensitive burglar? He takes things personally.
  7. Circumcision is a sensitive subject... ...but not as sensitive as it used to be.
  8. Why are burglars so sensitive? Because they take things personally
  9. Don't read this if you don't like sensitive topics Biting into an ice cream
  10. Why was the burglar so sensitive? He takes things personally
  11. I always feel bad using a new toothpaste In front of my extra sensitive one.
  12. How is your password like an emotional family court judge? They're both case sensitive.
  13. Never disappear. They're very sensitive fruits.
  14. How do you know if your teeth are sensitive? When you hurt their fillings
  15. Why was the one keyboard whispering to the other keyboard? It was case sensitive

Sensitive Person Jokes

Here is a list of funny sensitive person jokes and even better sensitive person puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • I'm the most sensitive person you know my cursor goes from side to side in one slide of a finger
Sensitive joke, I'm the most sensitive person you know

Silly & Ridiculous Sensitive Jokes to Spread Joy & Laughter

What funny jokes about sensitive you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean tender jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make sensitive pranks.

What do you call an intelligent, good looking, sensitive man?
A rumor.

What's the most sensitive part of a man's body during m**...?

His ear.

A Jumper

On January 9 a group of Pekin IL , bikers were riding west on I-74 when they saw a girl about to jump off a Peoria bridge, so they stopped.
The Harley leader, George a big burly man of 53, gets off his bike, walks through the gawkers, past the State Trooper, and says, "What are you doing?"
"I'm going to commit s**...," she says.

While he didn't want to appear "sensitive," he didn't want to miss a be-a-legend opportunity either so he asked ... "Well, before you jump, why don't you give me a kiss?"

So, with no hesitation at all, she leaned back over the railing and did just that ... and it was a long, deep, lingering kiss followed immediately by another one.

After she's finished, George gets approval from his group, the onlookers, and even the State Trooper, then says,
"Wow! That was the best kiss I have ever had, Honey! That's a real talent you are wasting, Sugar Shorts. You could be famous if you rode with me. Why are you committing s**...?"

"My parents don't like me dressing up like a girl".
The onlookers are still unclear whether she jumped or was pushed!

Why is it so hard for women to find men that are sensitive, caring, and good-looking?

Because those men already have boyfriends.

One I wrote a while ago: Anti-Boasting Cream

Now I don't tell many jokes and definitely don't write them so I found this on my phone from about two years ago and was amazed!
I went to see the Doctor this morning about my big ego. He told me to try this anti-boasting cream.
I said, how do I apply it? It's just i've got really soft, sensitive, supple skin. He said, You just have to rub it in.

Why is it so difficult for women to find a man who is sensitive, caring, and good looking?

All of those guys already have boyfriends.

Everyone's so sensitive these days, you can't even say 'black paint'.

You have to say 'Tyrone, paint that fence!'

My friend is a prison warden currently doing sensitivity training. His homework entails "What would you do if you saw two curious inmates indulging in i**...? "

I said "Why can't we just let bi-cons be bi-cons?!"

How do you broach the sensitive religious topic about the possibility a human soul might not actually exist?

Gingerly.

Three women sat discussing their husbands and their s**... lives.

"My husband's a wrestler," said the first. "He's really strong and aggressive in bed."
"My husband's an artist," said the second. "He's really gentle and sensitive."
"My husband's an IBM salesman," said the third. "He sits on the edge of the bed and tells me how good it's going to be when I finally get it."

Hear about the serial killer who was actually quite sensitive?

He wore other people's hearts on his sleeve.

My take on microaggressions: on one hand, it's true people can sometimes be too sensitive. On the other hand...

NOT EVERYONE HAS TWO HANDS CHECK YOUR PRIVILEGE.

The Washington r**... are very sensitive to concerns and have decided to change their name...

...to the DC d**....

Women are too sensitive.

My friend said she was having twins. All I said was at least you'll finally have 2 kids with the same father.

What is the most sensitive part of a mans anatomy while he's m**...?

His ears.
Oooo! I get to say it! "Front page?! Wow! Thanks y'all!" Oh yea, and "RIP my inbox"
Good times!

Guy bursts into a dentist's office

Guy bursts into a dentist's office and says "HEY, listen here buddy, you have to help me NOW: my teeth are SO sensitive they can sense impending EARTHQUAKES" the dentist looked at him sternly for a moment and said "you've got some nerve"

Society is so sensitive these days. I can't even say "black paint" anymore without being called racist....

I now have to say "Tyrone, could you paint the wall please."

I've been getting really sensitive teeth recently...

The dentist told me I wasn't taking care of them properly and they've been inconsolable ever since.

Doctors are advising people who are very sensitive to the cold to go stand in a corner.

Because as you know, corners are always 90 degrees
Stolen from Who's Line Is It Anyway

I like my women the same way I like my guns...

Black and oily with a sensitive trigger.

I have sensitive teeth...

And I'm afraid I'll say something that will hurt their fillings.

A coworker and myself had a competition to see who was more sensitive

I was pretty sad I came in second place.

Why the different branches of the military can't work together:

The reason why the services don't get along? They don't speak the same language. For example, if you tell a soldier to "Secure the building." he's going to set up claymores and machine gun nests with interlocking fields of fire. If you tell a Marine to "Secure the building." he's going to pie every room with his rifle in his hands and his Ka-bar on his waist. If you tell a sailor to "Secure the building." he's going to lock all the doors and windows and put all the sensitive documents in a furnace. If you tell an airman to "Secure the building." he's going to sign a lease agreement with an option to purchase.

What is it called when sensitive medical information about a very fat patient is disclosed?

A hippo violation

If Colgate kills 99.9% of germs, what does Colgate sensitive do?

It kills 99.9% of germs, without hurting their feelings.

What's the most sensitive part of your body when you're m**...?

Your ears, to hear if someone is coming.

Your cat died

A woman went on vacation, leaving her husband behind. Before she left, she told him to take extra special care of her cat.The next day she called her husband and asked if the cat was all right.
Her husband said: The cat just died.
She burst into tears and said: How could you be so blunt? Why couldn't you have broken the news gradually! Today, you could have said that it was playing on the roof; tomorrow, you could have said that it fell off and had broken its leg; then on the third day, you could have said that the poor thing had passed away in the night. You could have been more sensitive about the whole thing. By the way, how is my mom?
Husband: She is playing on the roof.

Women these days are too sensitive

My friend said she was having twins and all I said was 'Well hey, that's great, at least you've finally got two kids with the same father.' then she stormed off all pissy.
Women, amiright?

My dentist said that my gag reflex was much more sensitive than my wife's.

I didn't think anything of it at the time. Later, I realized it was super weird, because we go to different dentists.

People are so sensitive nowadays that you can't say "Could you paint the fence black?"

Now you have to say "Jamal, would you kindly paint the fence?"

I was sent home early today.

Apparently, asking a dwarf why he isn't wearing his leprechaun costume was offensive. I have to do 3 hours of sensitivity training.

My friend is really sensitive about his lack of height.

It's best not to tease him about though, or he'll punch you in the knee.

What is the most sensitive part of a man's anatomy while he is m**...?

His ears

Cosmetic surgery used to be such a sensitive subject.

But now when you make jokes about botox, nobody lifts an eyebrow.

Have you heard of the new republican themed c**... that is taking off?

It's extremely thin skinned and very sensitive

What is a man's most sensitive o**... when m**...?

His ears.

i've only showed my sensitive side once

and that was when i slowed down for a horse

Have you heard about the new super sensitive condoms?

They hang around after the guy leaves and talk to the woman.

So my coworkers and I were sent to "sensitivity training"

The lady running it said, "you have to use the right words to refer to people, because you don't want to offend them. Instead of 'policeman', say 'police officer'. Instead of 'fireman' say 'firefighter'. Don't say 'chairman', say 'chairperson'."
"Um, excuse me," I said, "I think they prefer to be called people with disabilities'."

I'm trying to learn how to be a more sensitive lover.

I watched a video called "How to improve your foreplay technique", it was really good.
I had to skip through the boring bit at the beginning.

What's the difference between John Brennan and a Nevada h**...?

Brennan can no longer legally handle sensitive material

Bought some extra sensitive toothpaste the other day...

It got really jealous when I used a different toothpaste this morning

Nowadays, the Twin Towers are like the genders.

They used to be two, now it's a sensitive matter.

Everyone is so sensitive and everything has to be completely politically correct nowadays, you can't even say 'black paint'.

You have to say "Tyrone, could you please paint the wall?"

"This is the hardest part of our job," said the police officer after Adam was pronounced dead in the accident.

"Yeah, but break the news slowly. His wife is a very sensitive person."
The police officer knocks on the door and Adam's wife opens it.
"Are you Adam's widow?" said the police.

A lot of people are upset about that Gillette commercial

I guess it wasn't made for people with sensitive skin.

The dentist asked me if I had sensitive toothpaste at home.

I told her toothpaste and I don't talk about our feelings.


(PS: This was the actual conversation I had with my dentist just last night!)

As for a non-Dad joke....not for sensitive types

A woman runs into a police station yelling "Grape! Grape! Grape!"
The policeman says "Don't you mean r**...?"
"No" she replied, "There were a bunch of them".

What's the most sensitive part of the body when m**...?

The ears

Genders and the Twin Towers have something in common...

There used to be two of them, and now it's a sensitive topic.

Blind, deaf and mute people can all tolerate a dark joke.

It's because they're not sensitive.

I called my son a b**... disappointment and my girlfriend burst out into tears

Appartently, she's sensitive about her miscarriage

A young salesman walks up to a house and knocks on the door. The most beautiful woman he has ever seen answers, dressed in only a slinky negligee. She asks "Do you like what you see?" Slack jawed, the man finally manages to stutter "uh... yes, very much!"

She says "Quickly, step inside, I think I hear someone coming."
Once inside the beautiful woman drops her negligee and is completely n**.... With a smile she asks "What do you think is the most sensitive part of my body?"
The salesman says "I guess that would have to be your ears."
"My ears? On this luscious body, you think my ears are the most sensitive?"
"Well, yes. When you said you heard somebody coming, that was me!"

My wife and I decided to stop having kids...

I haven't bought condoms in a while and I was surprised of find a years supply for such a reasonable price.
Pack of 3 for $3.69. Super-sensitive too.

If Colgate kills 99.9% of bacterias in mouth, what does Colgate sensitive do?

It kills 99.9% without hurting their feelings.

My dentist reminded me about my wife's sensitive gag reflex…

*We laughed about it for a while.*
*Then I remembered me and my wife have different dentists…*

My girlfriend invited me to meet her parents.

Before we went over, she let me know that her father, Dale, was in a car accident and had his legs amputated at the hips. Apparently, it was a sensitive issue, and I was not to mention it.
When we arrived, her dad greeted us at the door. Not seeing his wife anywhere, I said to him, Dale, it's great to meet you. Is your other half in the kitchen?

When my dentist reminded me about my husband's sensitive gag reflex, we laughed and laughed and laughed about it for a while, but then it hit me....

We have different dentists...

What is the most sensitive part of your body when m**...?

Your ears, listening for footsteps.

A time sensitive joke for you guys tomorrow..

Knock Knock
Who's there?
9/11
9/11 who?
You said you'd never forget.

Sensitive joke, A time sensitive joke for you guys tomorrow..

jokes about sensitive