Seminar Jokes
48 seminar jokes and hilarious seminar puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about seminar that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
This article focuses on how to make seminars fun and productive with jokes. Learn about using icebreaker questions, humorous valedictorian speeches, and fun-filled questionnaires to inject humor and laughter into seminars. Learn how to keep the seminar lively and productive with light-hearted humor!
Quick Jump To
Funniest Seminar Short Jokes
Short seminar jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The seminar humour may include short sermon jokes also.
- My colleague can no longer attend next week's seminar on innuendo... Now I have to fill her slot...
- As a volunteer, I taught a seminar on how to write persuasive speeches at my local prison. I titled the course: "Prose and Cons".
- I did a gig at statistics seminar. Told 100 jokes to try and make people laugh. No pun in ten did.
- My friend travels from town to town giving seminars on the health benefits of eating dried grapes. He is just out there, raisin awareness.
- I went to a science seminar and they announced they'd developed an acid that ate through everything. I asked them what they kept it in.
- I held a creative writing seminar at a women's prison last month How did it go? Well, it had its prose and cons.
- I went to a reincarnation seminar last night... ...I figured what the heck, you only live once.
- I recently went to a science seminar on new materials we could use to make knives more efficient It was cutting edge stuff.
- I had to attend a seminar for psychics and fortune-tellers. Unfortunately, it has been canceled due to unforeseen circumstances.
- I was quite excited to attend a seminar on unmanned aerial vehicles... but the speaker just droned on and on!
Share These Seminar Jokes With Friends
Seminar One Liners
Which seminar one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with seminar? I can suggest the ones about workshop and lecture.
- Seminar "How to avoid frauds" is canceled. Tickets are non-refundable.
- Going to a seminar on patience Can't wait!
- Seminar about time travel will be held yesterday.
- Seminar topic at the annual vampire conference "How to Deal with Stakeholders"
- I went to a drilling seminar today. BORING!
- I went to a seminar on drilling methods yesterday... Boring!
- Annual "How to Avoid Array Overflowing" seminar will be held at Febuary'29
- I hosted a seminar for multiple personality, It took me hours to make all the name tags.
- I forgot to go to my seminar on mindfulness
Cheerful Fun Seminar Jokes to Brighten Your Day with Humor and Joy
What funny jokes about seminar you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean conference jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make seminar pranks.
How many of you love your husbands??
There was a group of women gathered at a seminar on how to live in a loving relationship with your husband.
The women were asked, 'How many of you love your husbands?'
All the women raised their hands.
Then they were asked, 'When was the last time you told your husband you loved him?'
Some women answered today, some yesterday, some didn't remember.
The women were then told to take their cell phones and send the following text: "I love you, sweetheart."
Then the women were told to exchange phones and read the responding text messages.
Here are some of the replies:
1. Who is this ???
2. Ah, mother of my children, are you sick ?
3. I love you too !!
4. What now ? Did you c**... the car again ?
5. I don't understand what you mean ?
6. What did you do now? I won't forgive you this time !
7. ?!?
8. Don't beat about the bush, just tell me how much you need?
9. Am I dreaming?
10. If you don't tell me who this message is actually for, someone will die.
11. I asked you not to drink anymore. I'll leave if you are tired of me !
Financial Planning like a pro
Dan was a single guy living at home with his father and working in the family business. His sickly father told Dan he was going to inherit the business and a fortune but his father's one wish was to see Dan get married and settled before he passed on.
One evening, Dan went to a financial planning seminar, It was given by the most beautiful woman he had ever seen. She was bright and personable to boot. Dan fell in love at first sight. He told her, "I may look pretty ordinary, but my father will probably die soon and I will inherit the family business and a large fortune. Impressed, the woman asked Dan for his business card, and three weeks later, she became his stepmother.
Bubba n' Buford III
Bubba n' Buford jes left Texas A&M where they'd attend a seminar entitled "Advanced Composting" n' were a headin' back up Highway 79 towards east Texas. After a bit they got into an argument over whether Marquez was pronounced Mar-KEY or Mar-KAY. Well, they decided since they were about to go through Marquez they'd stop at the Dairy Queen for lunch n' ask, n' whoever was right would pay for lunch n' that they did. After orderin' Bubba smiles n' asks the waitress, "My friend Buford n' I been arguin' over how to pronounce this place. Could you tell us." The blonde waitress smiles n' says very slowly... "Dairy Queen."
Intimate With A Ghost
A professor at the University is giving a seminar on the supernatural.
To get a feel for his audience, he asks them, "How many folk here believe in ghosts?"
About 80 students raise their hands.
"That's a good start," says the professor, "For those who believe in ghosts, do any of you think you've ever seen a ghost?"
About 40 students raise their hands.
"That's really good," continues the professor, "I'm really glad you take this seriously. Has anyone here ever talked to a ghost?"
15 students raise their hands.
"That's a great response," remarks the impressed professor, "has anyone here ever touched a ghost?"
3 students raise their hands.
"Brilliant. But let me ask you one question further...
Have any of you ever been intimate with a ghost?"
One of his students from a r**... state raises his hand.
The professor is astonished. He takes off glasses, takes a step back, and says, "Son, all the years I've been giving this lecture, no one has ever claimed that.
You've got to come up here and tell us about your experience."
The r**... student replies with a nod and begins to make his way up to the podium. The professor asks, "Well, tell us what it's like to have made love to a ghost."
The student replies, "Ghost?!? Dang it... I thought you said 'goats.'
The Walk
I went to a mixed religion seminar.
The Christian Priest came, laid his hands on my hand and said, By the will of Jesus Christ, you will walk today!
I smiled and told him I was not paralysed.
The Rabbi came, laid his hands on my hand and said, By the will of God Almighty, you will walk today!
I was less amused when I told him there was nothing wrong with me.
The Mullah came, took my hands and said, Insha Allah, you will walk today!
I snapped at him, There's nothing wrong with me
The Buddhist Monk came, held my hands and said, By the will of The Great Buddha, you will walk today!
I rudely told him there was nothing wrong with me.
After the sermons, I stepped outside and found my car had been stolen.
An American, an Frenchman, an Israeli, a Spaniard, and a German go to see a seminar
They show up late, and can only find seats in the back row. When the presenter notices them come in and take seats in the very back, he shouts to them, "Can you guys see me back there?"
They answered back in order, "Yes" "Oui" "Ken" "Si" "Ja"
My son has been really nervous ever since he lost the specimen he was going to display at his upcoming insect "show and tell" seminar
i just hope he doesn't have butterflies in his stomach
My job sent me to a s**... harassment seminar last week...
And now, I'm thinking I'm gonna be pretty good at it.
I, too, went to a mixed religion seminar...
...But in the hopes of learning more about charity. First I asked a Buddhist monk: "How do you decide what to give away and what to keep for yourself?" "Child's play", he said. "I draw a small circle in the ground, throw my money into the air, and what falls outside of the circle I give to Buddha". Next I asked a catholic priest. "Easy my son", he told me. "All I do is draw a small circle in earth, throw my money to the heavens, and what falls into the circle I give to God". Finally, I asked a Rabbi. "Simple!" he answered. "I throw my money into the air and what god wants, he takes!"
Some grammar n**... told me about a seminar they are going to attend about cause and effect.
They're there to affect its effect and it's there for their two affects too.
1. Go to seminary.
2. Get degree.
3. ???
4. Prophet.
Work today had a s**... harassment seminar
It was a real let down when I found out they weren't going to teach how to s**... harass.
A Freshman Seminar Professor Was Trying To Wow His Students
He told them, "In the English Language, a double negative equals a positive. For example, I didn't not do it equals I did it. But no double positive in English equals a negative."
A student in the back shouted, "YEAH, RIGHT!"
I attended a s**... harassment seminar recently
so now i think im gonna be pretty good at it
A college student could not take his seminar final exam because of a f**....
"No problem," the teacher told him. "Make it up the following week." That week came, and again he couldn't take the test due to another f**....
"You'll have to take the test early next week," the professor insisted. "I can't keep postponing it."
"I'll take the test next week if no one dies," the undergrad replied.
By now I the instructor was suspicious. "How can you have so many people you know pass away in three weeks?"
"I don't know any of these people," the student exclaimed. "But I'm the only gravedigger in town."
On your knees everyone!
After a seminar on 'Your words are powerful' I decided to test my power.
.
So I walked into a banking hall with my right hand in my bag and shouted, " On your knees everyone!"
.
Before I could blink, everybody had obeyed me. Some people even laid face down.
.
After a while I brought out the bible and said, "let us pray..."
.
I think the seminar guy took my money, all I got in the end was a night in jail.
The Difference
During an anti-s**... harassment seminar at work, I asked, "What's the difference between s**... harassment and good-natured teasing?" A women shouted, "A million dollars."
I'm sitting and waiting for a seminar on Tantric s**... to end.
The speaker is taking forever to come.
A flat earther snuck into a physics seminar
While the speaker was giving speech on recent development about gravity, flat earther shouted
" Why do you even think that gravity is real? "
Speaker dropped the mic.
Italian Anniversary
At the church's husbands' marriage seminar, the Priest asked Luigi, on his upcoming 50th
wedding anniversary, to take a few minutes and share some insight into how he managed to
stay married to the same woman all these years.
Luigi replied to the audience "Well, I've-a tried to treat-a her well, spend-a the money on her, but-a, da best-a is-a dat I took her to Italy for the 20th-a anniversary!
The Priest immediately commented, "Luigi, you are an amazing inspiration to all the husbands here! Please tell the audience what you are planning for your wife for your 50th anniversary."
Luigi proudly replied, "I'm-a gonna go and-a get her."
Seminar
While attending a marriage seminar on communication, Jim and his wife listened to the instructor declare: It is essential that husbands and wives know the things that are important to each other. He addressed the men: For instance, gentlemen, can you name your wife's favorite flower? Jim leaned over, touched his wife's arm gently and whispered, Pillsbury All-Purpose, isn't it? The rest of the story is not pleasant.
Three archaeologists met in a seminar.
The British said: we dug very deep and found sculpted animal bones. This proves that my ancestors invented art.
The German said: we dug very deep and found a plate-size disk showing the solar system. This proves that my ancestors invented astronomy.
The Italian said: we dug very deep and didn't find any wires. This proves that my ancestors invented wifi communication.