Security Camera Jokes

25 security camera jokes and hilarious security camera puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about security camera that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Best Short Security Camera Jokes

Short security camera jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The security camera humour may include short security alarm jokes also.

  1. I got security cameras fitted outside my house. Just to convince people that I have stuff worth stealing.
  2. Grandpa: "Back in the day, you could walk into a grocery store with $ 2 and leave with a full shopping cart. But nowadays they have security cameras everywhere!"
  3. Yo momma is so ugly that when she walked into Wal-Mart they turned off the security cameras.
  4. I clicked on an NFL greatest hits compilation Unfortunately it was mostly just security camera footage of their girlfriends
  5. 10 years ago, you could walk into a store with just a dollar and come back out with a candy bar, a soda and a bag of crisps, Now there's security cameras everywhere!
  6. When I was a kid I could go to the store with only $5 and come home with bread, milk, hotdogs and my favorite candy. You can't do that these days... Too many d**... security cameras.
  7. When I was a kid, you could go in a store with 10 dollars and get out with a new ball, 4 milk j**..., a shirt and a pair of shoes. Nowadays you can't. There are security cameras everywhere.
  8. Police and Security companies are using fake hornets' nests to hide cameras. So if you see one, y**... the s**... down!

Quick Jump To

Make fun with this list of one liners, jokes and riddles. Each joke is crafted with thought and creativity, delivering punchlines that are unexpected and witty. The humor about security camera can easily lighten the mood and bring smiles to people's faces. This compilation of security camera puns is not just entertaining but also a testament to the art of joke-telling. The jokes in this list are designed to display different humor styles, ensuring that every reader at any age finds something entertaining. Constantly updated, they offer a source of fun that ensures one is always smiling !

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Security Camera One Liners

Which security camera one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with security camera? I can suggest the ones about security system and camera.

  1. Yo mamma so ugly when she was walking to the bank.
    They turned of the security cameras.

Security Camera Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.

What funny jokes about security camera you can tell and make people laugh? One example I can give are clean peeping tom jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help make security camera prank.

I asked my grandfather for twenty dollars.

"Twenty dollars?!" he said. "For what?"
"To buy groceries," I told him.
"When I was a boy," my grandfather said. "My mama would give me one dollar, just *one dollar*, and I'd go to the store and come home with two loaves of bread, two sacks of potatoes, a carton of eggs, three bottles of milk, a can of coffee and a box of tea."
He shrugged and paused.
"Times have changed and ya can't do that now," he told me. "Too many f**...' security cameras."

My grandpa would always tell me...

that when he was growing up, in rural Texas, his momma would give him $1 and send him down to the store. He'd come back with 2 loaves of bread, half a gallon of milk, a carton of eggs, and a pound of pork. He says you can't do that now-a-days, way too many security cameras.

An old man is talking to his grandson about how things were cheaper when he was a boy

He said that when he was a boy he could walk into a shop with £5 and walk out with a loaf of bread and milk coffee a tub of butter some bacon a pack of cigarettes and a news paper. The boy said that's amazing can I do that. The old man said no. You can't do that nowadays there are too many security cameras.

Shopping back then

My pop was telling me about how back in the fifties you could get so much more from the shops.

Het tells me "we used to be able to go into grace brothers with ten dollars and come out with two pairs of socks, some new u**..., a razor or two and a small bottle of aftershave."

But unfortunately as he tells me, "you can't get that much for ten dollars anymore...there's too many security cameras"

The school hired me as a photographer

So I was hired to photograph a school event and when I walked up to the doors these security guys stared me down and asked what I was doing
I started to reach for my camera and said I was the school shooter
And the d**... jumped on me and cuffed me!

Back in the day, I 'member me and my mom going to the store with two dollars in her purse and coming back with a big bag of spuds, two loaves of bread, a pound of cheese, three gallons of milk, half a dozen eggs and coffee…

You can't do that anymore…too many security cameras…

I used to be able to go to the store with only a quarter and come back with a carton of milk, but now I have to pay five whole dollars.

Some people blame inflation, but personally, I blame the security cameras.

A komodo dragon works security cameras at a store for other komodo dragons. Mostly, he makes sure no other dragon is spying on the customers.

He's a monitor monitor monitoring a monitor for monitoring monitors.

When i was a kid, you could go into a store with a dollar and walk out with a soda, 4 candy bars, chips, and some gum...

But now, they have security cameras everywhere
[not my joke, I got it from somewhere just don't remember where, and it's provably unfunny but it made me laugh a lil]

This old man was reminiscing about the good old days...

When I was a boy, my Momma would send me down to the corner store with a dollar, and I'd come back with five pounds of potatoes, two loaves of bread, three pints of milk, a pound of cheese, a box of tea, and a half a dozen eggs.
You can't do that now.
Too many f**...' security cameras.

A robber needs to get past a security camera...

He thinks about how he could get by. The he had an idea.
He took off all his clothes and walked by.
The camera immeadiately noticed him and he was arrested.
When the cops were asking him why he did the crime one of the cops asked, Why did you take all your clothes off before passing the camera?
The man said, Well after I took off my clothes in front of my girlfriend she said she couldnt see me anymore!

When I was a boy, my Momma would send me down to the store with $1 and I'd come home with 2 loaves of bread, 3 bottles of milk, 1/2 a pound of cheese, pack of tea and 6 eggs.

You can't do that now.

Too many security cameras

Grandma's Password

My 100 year old grandma asked me to set up a security camera, so she could see who was stealing her clothes at her assisted living facility, so I brought over a wireless camera and started to install an app on her IPAD for monitoring.
I needed her Apple ID to download the app, so I asked her what her password was.
She poked around in her notebook, and said "required".
It was the wrong password, so I told her, and she looked up at me and said, 'I know that it is right. I remember it said, "Your password is required."'

Back in the day I could go to the store with $5 and come home with a gallon of milk, a lb of baloney, 3 packs of cigarettes and a 12 pack. Can't do that anymore.

There are to many security cameras these days.

[OC] The fake Mona Lisa

So a copy of a Mona Lisa painting is in her house when a policeman knocks at the door.
The Mona Lisa opens the door and says "Yes, officer?"
The policeman replies: "You're under arrest."
"What, why?"
"Well," the policeman says, taking out a photo from a security camera of two paintings, one with a decorative golden edge and another with none at all, "two Mona Lisa paintings entered a bank yesterday, and one commited a bank robbery in which $10,000 was lost."
The Mona Lisa copy examines the photo closely. "But that can't be *me*!"
"Why?" responds the officer.
"Well, that other painting had no border - I was framed."

Jokes are a form of humor that often involves clever wordplay, puns or unexpected twists in a story. These are usually short narratives or anecdotes crafted with the intent of amusing its audience by ending in an unexpected or humorous punchline. Jokes are a universal form of entertainment that people of all ages like adults, teens, kids and toddlers can enjoy. JokoJokes' FAQ section has answers to questions you may have!

The impact of these security camera jokes can be both social and psychological. They can help to ease tensions, create bonds between people, and even improve overall mental health. The success of a joke often relies on the delivery, timing, and audience. Jokes can be used in various settings, from social gatherings to professional presentations, and are often employed to lighten the mood or enhance a story.