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Secluded Jokes

16 secluded jokes and hilarious secluded puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about secluded that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Funniest Secluded Short Jokes

Short secluded jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The secluded humour may include short isolated jokes also.

  1. What's the difference between a drug dealer and Bill Cosby? When you meet a dealer in a secluded area, you have to pay for the drugs.
  2. Bob walks into a metal bar... ... and he says, "Ow!" because his ears were not able to handle the intensity of the music due to Bob being secluded in the countryside his entire life.

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Secluded One Liners

Which secluded one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with secluded? I can suggest the ones about surrounded and solitary.

  1. Am I secluded? That's my business.
  2. What do you call a secluded Catholic retreat in the mountains? A molestery.

Secluded joke, What do you call a secluded Catholic retreat in the mountains?

Cheerful Fun Secluded Jokes to Brighten Your Day with Humor and Joy

What funny jokes about secluded you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean tucked jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make secluded pranks.

The aging head of a secluded Monastary decides he will take a walk into the nearby town for the first time in 30 years.

As he's walking down the street he passes a h**... on a corner who says "Hey twenty dollars for a q**...". Confused, he walks past another corner and another h**... says "Hey padre, twenty dollars for a q**...". He has no idea whats going on, so he returns to the monastary and calls the Mother Superior to his office and asks her "Whats a q**...?" She replies "Twenty dollars, same as in town".

A man has to pee...

But he is in the middle of Central Park. He finds what he believes is an out of the way spot, unzips, and does his thing.
To his surprise, the spot he chose was not very secluded, and before he can do anything about it, a woman walks right in front of him.
She shrieks and says, "g**...!"
"Danke schoen," he replies.

Ted Bundy was out one day having a lovely stroll with a lady friend.

They were walking through a gorgeous, secluded forest. After walking a while the sun was setting and it began to get dark.
The young lady turned to Ted and said, 'It's starting to look creepy here, I'm scared'.
Ted looked at her astonished and replied 'You're scared? How do you think I feel, I have to walk back out of here alone'.

a couple was walking in the woods when his bf pulled his girl in a secluded grassy area.

the bf then hurriedly stared taking off his pants.
then the girl ask, "do i start taking off my clothes too?"
the bf then replied.
"why? do you also need to take a s**...?"

7 attractive men meet a German woman at a bar

They are incredibly drunk so they drag her out back to a secluded alley. The whole time shes screaming NEIN NEIN NEIN.
So they went and got 2 more guys.

Having grown up in a small secluded area of Key West, I met a new friend who just moved here from New York.

Quite the change from all the hustle & bustle of city life for him. I was excited to hear all about his life there over dinner with his parents in town visiting.
He exclaims: Stores are massive, and the restaurants are fantastic!
Then he said; I went to a lot of t**... bars! Great drink specials! Do you have those here?? (Grinning heavily)
His mom: What do they do if it stars to rain?

A man decided to go skinny dipping

He found a secluded pond in the woods and went for a n**... swim. Some kids happened by and decided to steal his clothes as a joke and only left his straw hat. When the man finally noticed his clothes were missing, he grabbed his hat, covered the family jewels, and made a run for home. On the way he passed a house with an old woman in a rocking chair on the porch. When she noticed what was happening she burst into laughter. The man stopped and said, "Madam, if you were a lady you would not be laughing." Once the woman could control her laughter, she replied, "If you were a gentleman, you would tip your hat!"

Daddy, How Was I Born?

A little boy goes to his father and asks 'Daddy, how was I born?'
The father answers, 'Well, son, I guess one day you will need to find out anyway! Your Mom and I first got together in a chat room onYahoo. Then I set up a date via e-mail with your Mom and we met at a cyber-cafe. We sneaked into a secluded room, and googledeach other. There your mother agreed to a download from my hard drive. As soon as I was ready to upload, we discovered that neither one of us had used a firewall, and since it was too late to hit the delete button, nine months later a little Pop-Up appeared that said:
'You got Male!

Some day in Berlin

Yussel Rabinowitz and his wife Bessie were hiding from the n**... in a secluded Berlin basement.
One day Yussel decided to get a breath of fresh air, but while out walking he came face to face with Adolf h**... himself. The German leader pulled out a gun and pointed to a pile of horse-s**... in the street.
All right, Jew! he shouted, Eat that or I'll kill you.
Trembling, Yussel did as he was ordered. h**... began laughing so hard that he dropped his gun.
Yussel grabbed it and said, Now you eat, or I'll shoot!
The fuhrer got down on his hands and knees and began eating. While he was occupied, Yussel sneaked away and ran back to his basement. He slammed the door shut, bolted and locked it securely.
Bessie, Bessie! he shouted. Guess who I had lunch with today!

My grandfather sent me this in an email this morning.

Frank is 85 and lives in a Senior Citizens Home. Every night after dinner he goes to a secluded garden behind the home to sit and ponder his accomplishments and long life. One evening, Mildred, age 82, wanders into the garden. They begin to chat and before they know it, several hours have passed.
After a short lull in their conversation, Frank turns to Mildred and asks, "Do you know what I miss most of all?"
She asks, "What?''
"s**...." he replies.
Mildred exclaims, "Why you old toot. You couldn't get it up if I held a gun to your head!"
"I know," Frank says, "but it would be nice if a woman could just hold it for a while."
"Well, I can oblige," says Mildred, who unzips his trousers, removes his manhood and proceeds to hold it.
Afterward, they agree to meet secretly each night in the garden where they would sit and talk and Mildred would hold Frank's thingie.
Then one night Frank didn't show up at their usual meeting place.
Alarmed, Mildred decided to find him and make sure he was O.K.
She walked around the Senior Citizen Home where she found him sitting by the pool with Ethel, another female resident, who was holding Frank's little pal!
Furious, Mildred yelled, "You two-timing son-of-a-gun!! What does Ethel have that I don't have?"
Old Frank smiled happily and replied, "Parkinson's"