Search For Jokes
108 search for jokes and hilarious search for puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about search for that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Search For Short Jokes
Short search for jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The search for humour may include short search jokes also.
- Ebay needs to step their game up. I searched for a cigarette lighter and 15,000 matches came up.
- I just explained Google images to my mum... "Pick anything to search for" I told her.
"What about a nice cream pie?" She asked.
"Except that." I replied. - What's the biggest difference between Google and Pornhub? I'm willing to go to the 2nd page of search results on Pornhub.
- A thief A thief broke in to my house last night........He started searching my house for money so I woke up and searched with him.
- Have you heard about that new zelda game where you play as Zelda on a quest through underground caves? Search for the link below.
- Two FBI agents search an office and find a hard drive with "KGB" on it... One of the agents asks the other, "Why didn't they just write '1 TB' instead?"
- A burglar entered my house In the middle of the night so I asked him what he was doing. He said he was looking for money so I got up and searched with him :(
- Told my girlfriend that there was a party in my pants and that she was invited. She asked if it was a search party :(
- There are 10 types of people in this world. Those who thought they knew what the punchline would be, and those who are now searching for the original joke.
- A thief broke into my house last night He started searching for money so I woke up and searched with him
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Search For One Liners
Which search for one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with search for? I can suggest the ones about google search and seek.
- I searched google for "how to start a large fire" 52,000 matches
- IamA Bing search engine AMA Please. Just ask me something.
- A Robber entered my home in hopes of finding money..... I joined the search with him.
- What's the most searched word on Bing? Google
- Why haven't we found aliens yet ? because they are searching for intelligent life too.
- Ebay is way to hard to use I searched for lighters, and all I got was 71,274 matches.
- I've searched high and low for my brother's killer but nobody is willing to do it.
- I searched eBay for lighters But it only showed me 16,277 matches.
- What's the worst thing you can come across while searching the web? Your keyboard.
- What's the safest place to hide a dead body? Page 2 of Google search.
- I went on ebay and searched for lighters But all they had was 238,184 matches
- What is the most commonly searched term on Internet Explorer? Google Chrome.
- Why are telescopes pointed away from earth? Because they search for intelligent life
- The r in Gary Oldman … Is the most critical letter in the history of Google searches.
- A man is using Yahoo as his default search engine...
Fun-Filled Search For Jokes to Make You and Your Friends Chuckle & Giggle
What funny jokes about search for you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean search results jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make search for pranks.
I think my girlfriend is obsessed with s**... doo.
She keeps telling me we should split up and search for other people.
A World War 2 joke
Stalin and h**... died and were recieved in h**... by Satan.
Satan asked them to wait in the guest cabin, because he had to search for the worst place in h**... for both of them (it had been a long time since some one so evil had come to his abode) .
While waiting, h**... got bored and asked Stalin to tell him a joke.
Stalin said one word, "Moscow."
h**..., after a long and hard thought, replied, "I don't get it."
Stalin laughs merrily and says, "Exactly."
There was once a man who had 100 kids.
There was once a man who had 100 kids. He was not a creative man, so he named the kids after the number of their birth. One of his kids, 90, had a few kids when he grew older. One day, they found a dog on the road. They took him in, and named him This. This was a very good and well behaved dog. Dad, I'm going to go feed This. Hey dad, I'm taking This for a walk. One day, This went missing. The kids went out to search for him, when they saw him on the side of the road, with skid marks all over his body. Years later, the kids still remembered and missed This.
Moral of the story:
Only 90s kids will remember This.
Why do chess players search for love in Central Europe?
They prefer Czech mates
There's a place in UK where you can search for lost and found
Its called The British Museum
Kim Kardashin flour b**... incident
Police called off the search for the person who flower bombed Kim Kardashin.
They learned it was just Lindsey Lohan sneezing
I hate Sharknado, it is SO unrealistic.
Rain? In California? Did they even pretend to research for this movie?
I did a Google search for a cigarette lighter.
Ended up with 15,000 matches.
What's the difference between a g**... and a TV remote?
Men will actually search for a TV remote.
A bad day at the dentist is better than a bad day at the airport.
Because a search for cavities sure beats a cavity search.
Police are currently on the search for a man who steals the ends of jokes.
He is described as being a tall, blond man with a very big
What did Google say to the politically incorrect employee?
I can help you search for a new job.
Its funny how men and women both want to make their chest look bigger and that they're both just one similar search away from doing so ..
men look for pull up bars and women search for push up bras
A man can't decide what to get his girlfriend, a florist, for her birthday.
He goes all around town in search for a gift when he discovers a lovely garden of flowers. Because his wife loves flowers, he decides to pick out a lovely bouquet of daisies, roses and dandelions. The garden is empty and lifeless when he leaves that day.
When the day of his girlfriend's birthday arrives he gives her the handpicked bouquet of the flowers. The girl blushes and says Oh, thank you honey! These flowers are so pretty! They almost make me forget that someone destroyed my garden!
My grandpa isn't very computer savvy
So my Grandpa (72) got on the internet only recently and is still very unsure about how to use it. A month or so ago I taught him how to use email, to his amazement.
I also showed him how web browsing works and showed him how to put questions into Google search.
Yesterday he was planning to repaint the shed and wanted to know if latex paint would stick to stucco, so he did a search for Latex b**....
Help, I'm a Democrat who has a very specific f**... of looking at foreign dictators resting on top of crackers and I'm looking for people into the same as me...
So if you're Blue and you don't know what to search for why don't you look were Fascists sits... Putin on the Ritz
What do mathematicians and ravers have in common
They both search for X
What's the difference between a g**... and a golf ball?
A guy will actually search for a golf ball.
Needless to say the search for the stolen lemon tree
Remained Fruitless
One day people will land on Mars. Search for the rover, dust him off and give it the treatment it deserves.
A robo bro b**....
A committee has narrowed the search for a name for the newly hypothesised 9th planet.
It's between Urpenis and Urvagina.
Really Google Autocomplete? You honestly think I want to search for "h**... poem"?
Tinder is for rookies
Go to Facebook marketplace and search for wedding dresses. It'll show you recently divorced females in your area. From there you can filter by size
I'm doing market research for a telescope manufacturer,
I run the focus group.
The wife says I'm no longer allowed to help in our search for a new apartment as my suggestions are always "disgusting".
In my defence, the last place I found was in a great location in the centre of town and it did say "TO LET".
How was I supposed to know the "I" had fallen off?
I did a google search for Alzheimer's...
But for some reason all the links were already purple.
Which setting does Captain America search for in his Android Settings?
Language!
eBay is great for finding rare items, but there is a lot of bad search results that come with it
For example, I did a search for "Vintage Zippo Lighters" and I got 10,000 matches.
What was the working title for Star Trek III: The Search for Spock?
Finding Nimoy
Republican healthcare:
Pay an extra $5.99/month to use Google to search for the symptoms you have that you can't afford to have treated.
Nihilistic Kindergartners
David Bloom gained notoriety for his book Piscus Terminus: How to tell your five year old you flushed his fish down the toilet. Noted for its brute realism, the book's message led many kindergartners to spiral into a nihilistic despair, which contributed to the phenomenon of so called Kierkegaardeners , whose existential search for subjective truth in an otherwise meaningless world made birthday parties kind of a downer.
Three old friends got together and were discussing what movie they had watched when they conceived their children. One lady says she had just watched a movie called The Search for One-eye Jimmy and nine months later she gave birth to her baby. Another lady says, "Oh, I saw the movie Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs and then nine months later I had septuplets." The last lady gasps and exclaims, "Oh no, I just watched 101 Dalmations!"
If you do a Google search for "lost mideivel servant boy"
It will tell you "this Page cannot be found."
A young man was at prom with his date.
He went off in search for something to drink. After getting lost a few times, he finally asked a chaperone, "So where's the punch line?"
After all exhaustive, unsuccessful search for a mate, what did the gay rooster say?
"At this point, any c**...'ll doodle do."
Was doing an image search for Gary Oldman
Accidentally forgot the R. Results were hairy.
"The search for the man who terrorises nudist camps with a bacon slicer goes on....
Inspector Lemuel Jones had a tip-off this morning, but hopes to be back on duty tomorrow."
What do feminists search for on scavenger hunts?
Reasons to be offended.
Because of covid-19 I'm doing things I've never done before. Tonight, for the first time, I started looking for dates online.
My local supermarket has set up an online service where you can search for your groceries and things online. I've put in an order for a cup of cooking dates. I'm excited to pick them up. I'm sure they'll be very sweet.
What does a proofreader have in common with a vampire?
They search for type-os
Best New Reality Show
Amish,Midget,Moonshiners, search for Bigfoot
Request
I don't know if i can post this here but i need to pass my math exam and my teacher passes everyone who writes a joke to make him laugh. I need the best math jokes.
Anyway here's a joke:
What do you get if you add two apples and three apples?
A middle school math problem!
And what do you gett if you search for your ex and don't know why?
A college math problem!
I think Google is drunk or something…
It keeps giving me news articles when I search for "Asian forced by three guys."
2 boys searching for their lost girlfriends:
1st: How your girlfriend look like?
2nd: 5'6, hot, s**..., blue eyes... what about yours?
1st: Forget about mine.. lets search for yours.
Billy: "Help me find a version of Linux that will hasten my search for a quick snack."
Linus: "You need a bistro, not a distro."
A cop went into a fisherman's house to search for drugs. He had a bad feeling as he walked in.
Something seemed fishy.
Why does border patrol use airplanes to search for i**... crossing the border?
Because they are always hiding in plane sight
Why did Captain Picard have to stop using mobile internet to search for the Enterprise's second officer?
He'd gone over his Data limit.
What do Stephen Hawking and Ron Jeremy have in common?
They both search for warm holes
What do you use to search for anime in Google?
Weabooleans
I am forming a new punk band!
We are called "young boys getting sodomised by fat middle aged men".
Search for us on google!
I hate when I search for something online and everywhere I go I see ads for it
If I wanted to *buy* chloroform I wouldn't be searching how to make it.
I found a great app to search for Greek restaurants in your neighborhood.
It's called Gyroscope.
I do not have a hard time finding friends. The have a hard time finding me.
At least I hope they still search for me. This hide n seek game is already two days long...
IBM is Acquiring Red Hat
The company has stated that they believe that the red hat will be a major clue in their long time search for carmen Santiago.
Last night , my house was broken into
I joined the thieves in search for the money
What do blind monks search for?
The holy brail :)
if you search for a sexal informations click the link : www.abil.site
What does a theoritcal physicist and an alcoholic have in common?
They wake up and immediately search for the proof.
How do ghosts search for people to scare?
Boogle.
I went to an Indian restaurant to search for flatbread made in a tandoor.
There was naan to be found.
If someone stole Sherlock Holmes' magnifying glass, how would he search for clues?
Using watSonar
Where does the modern explorer go to in search for adventure?
The internet explorer goes onto amazon!
St. Bernards are dogs living in the Swiss Alps who search for lost travellers, skiers and mountaineers.
That's how they survive the winters.
What do you call a search for small guitars?
Uke hunt!
Google won't search for Chuck Norris because it knows you don't find Chuck Norris, he finds you.
Three old friends got together and were discussing what movie they had watched when they conceived their children. One lady says she had just watched a movie called The Search for One-eye Jimmy and nine months later she gave birth to her baby. Another lady says, "Oh, I saw the movie Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs and then nine months later I had septuplets." The last lady gasps and exclaims, "Oh no, I just watched 101 Dalmations!"
Three old friends got together and were discussing what movie they had watched when they conceived their children. One lady says she had just watched a movie called The Search for One-eye Jimmy and nine months later she gave birth to her baby. Another lady says, "Oh, I saw the movie Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs and then nine months later I had septuplets." The last lady gasps and exclaims, "Oh no, I just watched 101 Dalmations!"
is there a way that can help me stop procrastinating ?
nevermind, I'll search for it tomorrow.
A shepherd has 20 white sheep and 3 black ones.
A guy nearby comes to talk to him.
"What do your sheep do all day?"
"Well, usually the white ones search for good grass to eat."
"And the black ones?"
"They usually also spend time searching for good grass."
"How many times a year do you mow them?"
"I usually mow the white ones 3 to 4 times a year"
"What about the black ones?"
"About 3 or 4 times every year."
The guy frowns. "Why do you distinguish between the two kinds if the answer is the same?"
"Well, the white ones are mine."
"And the others?"
"Also mine!"
Darling, why do you want a home phone?!?
\- To search for my mobile!
What does a Mexican weeaboo search for?
The Juan Piece
How do you search for a playlist of Justin Bieber's songs without using Google?
You Shazam a f**....
The president of the university is asked a question about credible sources
President :"Its such an important thing, and it does not make sense for everyone to have to verify the credibility of the source and search for it every time its needed. So what I propose is we start collections of credible sources and hire some people to manage it. Whenever you wanted to get information on a subject you would just ask one of those people and they would help you get it."
Reporter: "Would you consider expanding the campus library?"
President: "No way, its a waste of space and money."
A brunette, a redhead, and a blonde rob a bank and lose the cops long enough to find a place to hide.
They drive until they find an empty barn, ditch their car, and duck inside just as they start to hear sirens. The brunette hides in a barrel, the redhead hides in a haystack, and the blonde hides in a burlap sack, and shortly thereafter, a police officer comes into the barn to search for them.
He comes to the barrel and kicks it hard, hoping to spook anyone hiding inside.
The brunette goes, "Meow! Meow!"
"Just a cat," says the cop, and continues on his way.
He comes to the haystack and rustles it, hoping to spook anyone hiding inside.
The redhead goes, "Squeak! Squeak!"
"Just a rat," says the cop, and continues on his way.
He comes to the burlap sack and tugs on it, hoping to spook anyone hiding inside it.
The blonde goes, "Potatoes! Potatoes!"
I hope my search for my lost h**......
isn't in vein.
Lord is my Savior
Father Jones was barely alive, clinging to the remaining wooden flanks of the sinking ship he was on. Rescue boats were busy rescuing other survivors in the ocean as soon as possible, but Father Jones wouldn't want any of that for himself. Being an ardent believer, he insisted *''Lord is my savior!''*, when a lifeboat came to rescue him. After almost an hour, another rescue boat came to search for anyone remaining alive, and they spotted Father Jones, who, as usual, insisted *''Lord is my savior!''*. The rescue boat finally went reluctantly.
Finally, after two hours, Father Jones managed to reach the Pearly Gates of Heaven. He prostrated before Jesus and said *"Lord my God, thank you for bestowing this grace upon me by showing yourself to me. I just have one question. All my life, I have firmly believed that you would always be there save me. Why did you not save me?"*
And Jesus spoke *"Well, my child, what do you think I was sending those rescue boats for?"*
A few fresh snails
Tom's wife was hosting a dinner party for some of her close friends, at their summer home. Moment's before the guests were scheduled to arrive, she asked Tom if he would be ever so gracious to walk a block down some fresh snails for the party.
On his way to the beach he passed the local bar, and figured he'd stop in for a quick drink before heading down to the beach to search for the snails. One drink lead to the next, and before he knew it, it was 5:00 in the morning and he hadn't gotten his wife those snails.
Quickly he hurried down, picked up a few snails, rushed home, and stumbled up the front steps, dropping the snails. At that moment, his wife angrily opened the door asking him where he had been and how he had ruined her party.
Tom, looked towards the snails and said C'mon you slow pokes! Just a few more steps and we're there!
[OC] During his search for the Holy Grail...
King Arthur sent his knights and squires to all four corners of the globe. One of his ships landed in Zimbabwe, and engaged in grueling battle with the local tribe of cannibals for no less than 30 days and 30 nights. The knights had fought long and hard, but ultimately succumbed to the sheer numbers of the tribe.
During the night's celebratory feast, one of the tribesman looked up from his haunch of meat and over to his brother. "Hey, does this taste funny to you?"
His brother took a bite of his meal, chewed for a few seconds and after giving it some thought, replied "You know what?"
"What?"
"...I think we're on the same Page."
