Seagull Jokes
64 seagull jokes and hilarious seagull puns to laugh out loud. Read animal jokes about seagull that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Do you love a good laugh? Check out this collection of funny seagull jokes. From seagull poop to gags inspired by Red Skelton, these chortles are sure to have everyone in stitches. You'll also find jokes about geese and gulls, as well as terns. Get your daily dose of seagull humor here!
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Funniest Seagull Short Jokes
Short seagull jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The seagull humour may include short peacock jokes also.
- I saw a huge seagull today... It was big enough to be a D-gull
But not quite big enough to be an Eagle - What do you call a seagull that lives by the Bay? I don't know, but it won't shut up about the app it's developing.
- If a seagull lives by the sea... If a seagull lives by the sea, what do you call a bird that lives by the bay?
A Bay Gull - If birds that fly over the sea are called seagulls, what do you call birds that fly over the Keys? Kegels.
- I really wanna go to the Flock of Seagulls concert in the middle east... But Iran so far away.
- What's the difference between a seagull and a pelican? You can't sea a pelican.
Note: I'm actually on laughing gas rn btw. - I was studying abroad in the Middle East, when a flock of seagulls attacked Iran so far away.. 'Couldn't get away
- I asked a poor pirate why he had a seagull on his shoulder instead of a proper parrot. "Arrrr...it were on sail.'
- Did you know the 80's pop band "A Flock of Seagulls" is gaining alot of attention in the middle east? They're getting really popular in Pakistan, Afghanistan And Iran, I ran so far away!
- The worst thing you can be is gullible My friend told me that means you're prone to random attacks by seagulls
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Seagull One Liners
Which seagull one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with seagull? I can suggest the ones about sea animal and swan.
- Why do you never see a flock of seagulls in the middle east? Because Iran's so far away
- Why do seagulls fly over the sea? because if they flew over the bay, they'd be bagels.
- Why did the oil covered seagull get sued? There can only be one goo gull
- My 3yo: lets go to the beach and eat seagulls Me: What?!?
Son: lets eat bagels by the sea - Seagull joke Q: What do you call a seagull that knows martial arts?
A: Steven Seagull - What do you do when you see a Flock of Seagulls? You run. You run so far away.
- What do you call a seagull that's not allowed in the country ? Illegull.
- I saw a flock of seagulls today And I ran
- What is a Seagull's favorite condiment? Grey Poupon
- Why do seagulls go to the beach? Because of the sand, which is there!
- What do you call a seagull in Nebraska? Lost.
- what does a digital seagull wear to the beech a beak.ini
- What do you call an invisible seagull A gull
- What kind of bird would make a great action movie star? Steven Sea-gull
- What do you call a blind seagull? A Can't See Gull
Seagull Jokes to Giggle and Enjoy A Night of Unforgettable Laughter
What funny jokes about seagull you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean bird of prey jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make seagull pranks.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
If seagulls fly over the sea, what flies over the bay?
Your mom.
What did the seagull say to the other seagull who stole his lobster?
Well that was shellfish.
My dad's best improv
We were driving one day and my dad had to stop the car because a seagull was in the middle of the wet road picking away at a soggy box.
I asked him why he stopped the car instead of driving on.
To which he replied, "He's just trying to get his cardboardhydrates"
Needless to say, everyone in the car was stunned.
What do you call a seagull that catches you sleeping?
A baegull.
A man and his pet seagull walk into a bar...
It's about 5pm, but they're ready for a good night of drinking.
They start off slowly, watching TV, drinking beer, eating peanuts. As the night goes on they move to mixed drinks, and then shooters, one after the other.
Finally, the bartender says: "Last call." So, the man says, "One more for me... and one more for my seagull." The bartender sets them up and they shoot them back.
Suddenly, the seagull falls over dead. The man throws some money on the bar, puts on his coat and starts to leave.
The bartender, yells: "Hey buddy, you can't just leave that lyin' there." To which the man replies: "That's not a lion, that's a seagull." ...
Why do seagulls cross the sea?
Because, if they crossed the bay they would be baygulls.
I'm sorry.
Why do Seagulls live by the Sea?
If they didn't, they'd be Bagulls!
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
How do you make a seagull explode?
Convert it to islam
The pirate and the sailor
A sailor walks into a bar and sees a pirate with a peg leg, a hook hand and an eye patch. His curiosity leads him to approach the pirate and ask, "Why do you have a peg leg?"
"I was washed overboard and a shark bit me leg off." the pirate responds.
"Okay," says the sailor, "but what about your hook hand?"
"Me first mate tried to kill me with his sword but only got me hand instead."
"Okay," says the sailor, "but what about your eye patch?"
"I was walking along the beach and a seagull pooped on me eye." the pirate explains.
"A seagull pooped your eye out?" the sailor asks incredulously.
"No," the pirate explains, "it was the first day with me hook."
Why do seagulls fly to the dumps along the coast of New England?
To beat the Portugees
Seagull mystery
if seagulls fly over the bay, would they be BAY-GELS?
What do you call a seagull that flies over a bay?
A seagull. I don't know what you were expecting.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What did the seagull say to the pelican?
Nice s**....
One seagull turns to the other and says...
"Hey! Did ya'know Jeff can fit 20 fish in his mouth at the same time" and the other seagull replies...
"Like Pell-He-Can!"
Seagull with diarrheia
Seagull With Diarrhea told another that it barely Made It To Crowded Beach In Time.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
If a seagull flys over the sea, then what flys over the bay?
A bagel!
(Came up with this Louis c**... style slapstick literature at 5 years old, give me bronze)
What do you call a seagull fresh out of the oven?
A 360 degree tern.
What do you get when you mix a bagel and a seagull?
A bagull.
What do you find between a Beagle and a Deagle?
A Seagull.
Was it here I read this?
If an eagle would mate with seagull, would it make an eagull or a seagle?
A teacher confiscates two birds, a dog, and a handgun from a kindergarten student.
Teacher: "What are you doing with these things?!"
Student: "I'm practicing my alphabet."
Teacher: "Bringing animals and a gun to class is no way to learn!"
Student: "Sure it is. I have a beagle, a seagull, a Deagle, and an eagle."
A pirate walks into a bar with a peg leg, a hook hand, and an eye patch...
He sits down, and after a few drinks someone asks him what happened to your leg?
Aye, a shark, he says. He bit it clean off!
Then someone asks him what happened to your hand?
Aye, a crocodile, he says. Bit it clean off!
Finally, someone asks him what happened to your eye?
Aye, a seagull, he replies.
A seagull? Someone says.
Yes, says the pirate. Pooped in my eye, he did. First day with my hook hand,
What is another way to call a seagull?
Mermaid.
It must have been terrifying being a soldier storming the beaches of Normandy
But it must have been even more terrifying being a crab or seagull
What did the French existentialist seagull say?
POURQUOI!
In the early 1970s, researchers discovered...
...that a certain enzyme in a specific breed of seagull chicks granted dolphins that ate them a dramatically increased lifespan. Hoping that this could be made viable for humans, they started extensive testing. Unfortunately, the breed of gulls wasn't native to the area around their laboratory.
They sent a research assistant up the coast to gather additional specimens. On his way back with a truckload of the tiny birds, he accidentally struck a cougar in the road. Unfortunately for him, it was (at the time) the state animal, and harming one was a felony.
The poor guy was charged with transporting young gulls across a state lion for immortal porpoises.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A seagull, a pelican, and a stork walk into a bar.
The bartender albeit shocked, asks the gentlebirds what they'll be having.
To which the seagull says "ill have a s**... on the beach." The bartender nods in acknowledgement. The stork speaks up next saying, "ill have a p**... dropper." Again the bartender nods. He looks to the pelican and asks the bird what he will be having.
In response the pelican makes an indistinguishable noise. The bartender replies that he did not catch that. To which again the pelican makes an indistinguishable noise.
Confused he looks to the other two avians for an answer.
"I dont know why you are looking at us mate we don't know what he is saying either, he's a bird, he pelican talk.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why do seagulls fly over the sea?
Because they are bird brains!
It was a man's first day on a pirate ship.
He noticed the captain had a peg leg, a hook for a hand, and a patch over his eye.
The man was curious so he asked the captain how he lost his leg.
The captain responded, Arrrrr, a shark bit me leg off.
The man asked how he lost his hand. Arrrr, I lost me hand in a sword fight.
Finally, the man asked the captain while he wears a patch over his eye. The captain said, Arrrr, a seagull pooped in me eye, and it was me first day with a hook.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
The anthropology student and the pirate.
An anthropology student was interviewing a retired pirate.
The student said: You have a wooden leg, a hook in place of a hand, and a patch over what I assume is an empty eye socket! How did all this happen?
The pirate replied:
I lost the leg to a canon call
I lost the hand in a sword fight
And I lost the eye because a seagull s**... in it
The student was skeptical:
A little seagull s**... shouldn't have cost you an eye!
The pirate said:
It was the first day with the hook...
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
3 men are standing on a cliff near the ocean.
Suddenly, a genie appears and says: "I can turn you into anything you want, if you jump off this cliff. Just say what you want to transform into after jumping, and I will work my magic."
The first man jumps, and shouts:
"Seagull!"
He then transforms into a seagull, and flies away.
The second man jumps, and shouts:
"Whale!"
He turns into a whale, and lands in the water.
The third man, tripped on a rock and shouted:
"s**...!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A propper pirate walks into a bar, wearing his pirate hat, eye patch, old guns by his hip, of course also a hook and all these kind of things. The barmaid asks him:
What the h**... happened to you?! Why do you have a hook?! He replies: „Ah well its just one of these war stories, you know.. lost my hand in a fight.
„Wow! And how did you get the eye patch? sais she.
„Oh, that is because seagull s**... into my eye there once.
The barmaid responds: „What?! But nobody loses his eyesight from this?!
„Yes that is true.. answers the pirate, „..but at that point I only had the hook since 3 days.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A propper pirate walks into a bar, wearing his pirate hat, eye patch, old guns by his hip, of course also a hook and all these kind of things. The barmaid asks him:
What the h**... happened to you?! Why do you have a hook?! He replies: „Ah well its just one of these war stories, you know.. lost my hand in a fight.
„Wow! And how did you get the eye patch? sais she.
„Oh, that is because seagull s**... into my eye there once.
The barmaid responds: „What?! But nobody loses his eyesight from this?!
„Yes that is true.. answers the pirate, „..but at that point I only had the hook since 3 days.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I have a friend who does the best ever seagull impression.
He can't do the noise, he just nicks your chips and s**... on your car.
