I just thank my lucky stars I live in Canada.
...is only one sea away from Ireland?
Every time I lay my ear on it I can smell the sea.
Suddenly, a rogue wave comes in and sweeps the grandson out to sea. Distraught, the grandmother looks to the sky and says, "Oh god, i have always been true and faithful to you. Please bring my grandson back." And with that, another wave comes in and deposits the grandson safely on the shore. The grandmother once again looks to the sky and says, "He had a hat."
Sure, there's plenty of fish in the sea. But until i catch one, I'm just stuck here holding my rod.
When I put my ear to it I could smell the sea
When suddenly the dog slips and falls in to the rough sea below. Distraught, she begins to scream for help as the waves drag the dog deeper and deeper. Out of nowhere a German man dives in, brings it ashore, resuscitates it and the dog gets up as if nothing has happened. The woman, who is incredibly thankful to the man says Thank you so so much, you've saved my dogs life, are you a vet?? to which the German man replies VET??? I'M FUCKING SOAKING
Neutral
As in
Without an ion
Obama declares: Our submarines can stay submerged for ten days before needing air.
Putin promptly says: That's nothing. Russian submarines can stay submerged for up to a month.
Merkel is embarrassed and stays silent.
Suddenly a submarine emerges. The hatch opens and the man yells: Heil Hitler! Is the war over?
The librarian asks "hard back?"
The guy replies "yeah little heads too."
When I woke I realized it was just a Fanta sea.
Everyone on the beach panicked because we didn't cremate him...
Thankfully it was just a fanta sea.
But until I catch one, I'm just going to be sitting here, holding my rod.
Remove an electron.
A nervous wreck!
I first heard this at xmas 1952 (64 years ago) and it still makes me smile.
Sherman marched to the sea
When you put your ear on it, you can smell the ocean.
I'm so fucking glad I live in Canada.
she walked past the walrus enclosure at Sea World, and her iPhone X unlocked itself.
There are plenty of fish in the sea, but it's just you holding your rod until you catch one.
Twenty feet below sea level, a diver notices another guy at the same depth with no scuba gear.
The diver goes down another 10 feet, and the guy joins him a minute later. The diver goes below 15 more feet, and a minute later, the same guy joins him.
The diver takes out a waterproof pad and pencil and writes, "How are you able to stay this deep without equipment?"
The guy takes the pencil and pad and writes, "I'm drowning, you moron!"
..That's a moray..
What's Kraken?
Oops, wrong sub.
Turns out it was just Fanta sea.
But it was just a Fanta sea.
Cause you're on the fuckin beach.
Fish and ships
A sea section.
Most people think it's the Arrr, but it really be the sea.
Do not accept if seal is broken.
You can run but you can't tide!
They are sending them out to sea.
Iceland
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