Scuttled Jokes

5 scuttled jokes and hilarious scuttled puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about scuttled that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Scuttled Funny Jokes to Tell Your Friends and Kids.

What is a good scuttled joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.

Two men are playing a round of golf when they get stuck behind two women.

Eventually one of the men walks over to ask if they can play through. He scuttles back and says, "When I got closer, I realized it was my wife and mistress; You go and ask them instead."
The other one walks over to the women but hurries back and says, "Small world."

A man scuttled out to his garage and began pulling the lawn furniture out onto the driveway.

Shortly after he did the same with the lawnmower, a few gardening tools and a bicycle.
A curious neighbour wandered over and asked if he was going to have a garage sale.
No, replied the man. My son just bought his first car and right now he's getting ready for a big date.
So what's with all the stuff? asked the neighbour.
Well, after years of moving tricycles, toys and sports equipment out of the way every time I came home from work I wanted to make sure the driveway was ready for him.

What can you see when you're 8 min high moving quickly?

A spaced scuttle

A chicken walks into a library

.. and it approaches the librarian desk, and starts clucking "bok Bok! boook bok bok." The librarian hands him a book, and the chicken tucks it under its wing and hastily runs out the door. A few moments later, the chicken runs back with the book, drops it on the floor, and again commences with "book bok BOK bok BOK!" The librarian picks up the second, book, hands the chicken a new book, and watches as the chicken scuttles off out the door again. Fifteen minutes later the chicken returns, drops the last book on the ground, paces around in a circle, and does the whole "Book bok BOK bok!" bit again, so the librarian hands it a third book, but this time follows the chicken down out the door. The librarian follows the chicken all the way down to a nearby river, where the chicken has dropped the book in front of a frog, which frustratingly replies with "read-it, read-it, read-it."

So there are a group of engineers and a group of mathematicians heading to a conference

They are sitting on a train together when both groups spot the train's ticket collector coming down the aisle. Quickly two of the engineers scuttle into the washroom, leaving the mathematicians confused. After the collector stamps all the mathematicians tickets he approaches the washroom and knocks.
"Ticket please"
A ticket slides under the door, and is stamped by the collector and returned.
"Thank you!" replies the collector.
Both groups then enjoy lots of nerdy things at the conference.
On the way home the mathematicians had learned the engineers trick. As the train pulls away the mathematicians all hide in the washroom, using the scam they had seen the engineers pull on the way there.
One engineer stands up and then knocks on the washroom declaring "Ticket please!" After which the mathematicians slides his ticket under the door.
The mathematicians pile out of the washroom and return to their seats with a grin on their faces.
Soon after the ticket collector enters the car, at which time all the engineers cram themselves into the washroom.

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