scorpion Jokes

funny pick up lines and hilarious scorpion puns

Two soldiers are walking through the desert...

And a scorpion crawls up on one of the Tim's leg and stings him right in the dick. Johnny calls the base and asks to talk with the medic. He tells him what happened to Tim and asks what the best course of action would be. Since the base is far away, the medic tells Johnny that he has to suck the venom out of the wound before it spreads. Tim asks: "What did the medic say?"
Johnny says: "He says you're gonna fucking die"

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A joke about the different branches of the US military.

What would you do if you found a scorpion in your tent?

A sailor says, I'd step on it

A soldier says I'd report it to my CO

A marine says I'd catch it, cut off it's tail and eat it!

An airman responds I'd pick up the phone and call room service and ask why's there a fucking tent in my room

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Why I Joined the Air Force

The DOD was conducting an all service briefing and the leader posed this question.
What would you do if you found a scorpion in your tent?
A sailor said, I'd step on it.
A soldier said, I'd squash it with my boot.
A marine said, I'd catch it, break the stinger off, and eat it.
An Airman said. I'd call room service and find out why there's a tent in my room.

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A soldier finds a scorpion in his tent...

In the Marines, he kills the scorpion.

In the Army, he calls his CO and reports the presence of the scorpion.

In the Air Force, he calls the front desk and asks why there's a tent in his room.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple?

Being raped by a giant scorpion..

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How did Scorpion console Sub-Zero when he broke up with his girlfriend?

GET OVER HER!!

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Best yo momma joke?

Your momma so ugly when she plays Mortal Kombat Scorpion says "stay over there"

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What did Scorpion tell his friend after he was dumped?

GET OVER HER!

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What did Scorpion say when Sub-Zero wouldn't stop pining over his ex-girlfriend?

Get Over Her!

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Yo mommas so ugly..

Scorpion said
"STAY OVER THERE"

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Yo mama so ugly...

...when she plays Mortal Kombat, Scorpion says "STAY OVER THERE!"

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Yo mama's so ugly...

Scorpion yelled "STAY OVER THERE!"

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So my friends and I were having a debate over Mortal Komabt

We concluded Sub-Zero is definitely cooler than Scorpion

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What do you get when you cross a poisonous viper and a giant scorpion?

Probably what you deserve.

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You mama is so ugly...

Even Scorpion from Mortal Combat says: "Stay over there!"

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Your mom is so ugly

Scorpion told her "STAY OVER THERE!"

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Your mother is so ugly.....

That when she fought Scorpion in Mortal Kombat, he yelled, "Get over there!"

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What did scorpion say to your ugly mum

Stay oveerrr there

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What do scorpions do in a race?

They venom.

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What's worse than stepping on a pile of horse manure?

Getting raped by a giant scorpion.

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Your momma is so ugly

Your momma is so ugly that Scorpion says "Get away from me"

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I sucked a scorpion in the vacuum cleaner the other day

Another one bites the dust

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I'll always remember waking up swole

Stupid scorpion. . .

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You're so ugly, Scorpion be like, "Stay over there!"

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What's worse than rainy days?

Getting raped by a giant scorpion.

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Did you hear about the problem in Pakistan where smoking a scorpion gets you high?

Well only the men get high, the women get stoned

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What are the most funny Scorpion jokes of all time ?

Did you ever wanted to stand out with a good sense of humour joking with someone about Scorpion? Well, here are the best Scorpion dad jokes to laugh out loud. Crazy funny puns and Scorpion pick up lines to share with friends.

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