Following is our collection of funny Scientific jokes. There are some scientific theory jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.
Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these scientific density puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.
Common sense.
A graduated cylinder.
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This is the only joke I've ever thought of.
...men who point that out.
They do this for two reasons;
One, The scientists become less attached to the lawyers.
And two, there are certain things that even *rats* won't do.
(This is a joke from the film, **Hook**. I never realized how funny it was)
Digits...
Scientists were playing hide and seek. Einstein was seeker.
Amongst the other scientists, Newton did not hide and stood in a 1 meter square.
Einstein: I found you Newton, I-spy
Newton: I am not Newton, as I am standing in 1 mtr square, I am newton per meter square: I am Pascal
!@#$%^&*()
Mollahs wanted to bring the scientific method to Iran, but then someone in the process mistyped "trial and error" into "rial and terror"
1. He had only one major publication.
2. It was written in Aramaic, not in English.
3. It has no references.
4. It wasn't even published in a refereed journal.
5. There are serious doubts he wrote it himself.
6. It may be true that he created the world, but what has he done since
then?
7. His cooperative efforts have been quite limited.
8. The Scientific community has had a hard time replicating his results.
9. He unlawfully performed not only Animal, but *Human* testing.
10. When one experiment went awry, he tried to cover it by drowning his
subjects.
11. When subjects didn't behave as predicted, he deleted them from
the sample.
12. He rarely came to class, just told his students to read the book.
13. Some say he had his son to teach the class.
14. He expelled his first two students for learning.
15. Although there were only 10 requirements, most of his students
failed his tests.
16. His office hours were infrequent and usually held on a mountain top.
Q: Why are Curium, Helium, and Barium the medical elements?
A: Because if you can't Curium or Helium them, you Barium!
Its official scientific name is Megasaurass
Ducks like a quack.
You can explore scientific discoveries reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean scientific scientist dad jokes. There are also scientific puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
It kills people, but cures salmon.
I just want to make myself crystal clear.
They discovered a louse so small that it lives on the back of the common housefly.
It's a remarkable discovery, but it's gone completely unnoticed because nobody thinks it odd that the Chinese are raving about their fly lice.
B positive.
A reprimand from the Scientific Ethics and Integrity Committee and an immediate withdrawal of your grant funding.
RPM ( Revolutions Per Minute )
Teach a fish to human and you've got a scientific breakthrough.
It's not interesting to me, but hey, whatever floats your boat.
An Oxymormon
Evidence that female hormones are present in beer. A group of men were given six pints of beer each. One hundred percent of the men gained weight, talked excessively without making sense, became overly emotional, couldn't drive, failed to think rationally, argued over nothing and refused to apologize when wrong.
The more of them you have, the longer you live.
of people do not realise I replaced the beginning of this joke with a musical instrument.
The other 5% just get sucked into it.
A stern letter from the scientific ethics committee.
A letter from the Scientific Ethics Committee and a withdrawl of your grant money.
Stuck Home Syndrome
One eye is looking atcha and the other is looking phoria.
Biggus duckus
It's rather long so I need someone to help me finish.
Because I'm not dead.
...than bearded women.
Other 10% don't come to school
...that stutters.
A Hannibal Lecture.
I felt great, but was in the control group. It turns out I was listening to Placebo Domingo.
I'm not fat, I'm really hot
"**New study reveals migrating Crows' droppings may be responsible for great barrier barrier reef bleaching**"
The article receives widespread criticism from the scientific community. Marine biologists across the globe insist that coralation does not imply Cawsality.
Embalming
You get nomenclature.
Yeah, me neither
Python.
It's really readable and flexible, and has great scientific packages, so most people are pretty fond of it.
A new scientific study came out recently proving a correlation between vaccines and adults with autism.
The reason given to this correlation was the children without vaccines died before becoming adults
Because Science always works.
They have little antibodies
Mourning Wood
But they don't use it for shit
The control group.
Because I'm not dead.
to Urmama
The entire world wide scientific community swiftly points out that the Sun is too hot for such a journey and they'd quickly burn up to which they replied very smugly: "Ah SEE! We've thought of this and have a plan!.....We're going at NIGHT!"
I do not mean to offend anyone and my apologies to the Polish, I grew up in the '60's with a mix of Russian, Czech, Hungarian, Pole parents, relatives and friends and this is mild to the shit we dealt ourselves and friends back then. ;)
The more of them you have, the longer you live!
A stern rebuke from the scientific community and a immediate withdrawal of funding
most people will not immediately notice if one of the words in a sentence has been replaced with a musical instrument until they've read more than three quarters of the way through it.
A subsequent study found that it only seemed longer.
Because they can't count.
A man stormed into the doctor's office full of excitement. He grabbed the doctor's hand and pumping it furiously, exclaimed Doc, I just want to thank you and tell you how your treatments have improved my life! The bold way that incorporate new scientific breakthroughs with traditional holistic has made all the difference, Thank you!
The doctor, amazed and confused, stammered Thank you, but you're not one of my patients..
I know, said the man, but my uncle was and I'm his only heir!!
Farticles.
Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the scientific curium jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.
We suggest to use only working scientific researcher piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.