School Subject Jokes
55 school subject jokes and hilarious school subject puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about school subject that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Funniest School Subject Short Jokes
Short school subject jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The school subject humour may include short school work jokes also.
- What's a pirate's favorite school subject? Arrrrrrrrt.
What's a pirate's favorite body part?
The arrrrrm.
What's a pirate's favorite branch of the military?
No. The Navy you idiot. - I hear my local school wants to introduce massage classes to help combat stress but there's been a lot of opposition from parents' groups. Apparently, it's a very touchy subject.
- What is a woman's favourite subject at school? History. They are great at bringing up stuff from the past.
- Despite my excellence in all other school subjects, I always got bad grades in Greek history. It was my Achille's elbow
- School should be like a woman's skirt... Long enough to cover the subject matter, short enough to keep things interesting
- Did you know that a school of piranha can devour a whole 3-year old child in under 30 seconds? On another subject, I lost my job at the aquarium today.
- ELI5 What happens when a high school calls in a replacement teacher for a subject they know nothing about? Ooops... wrong sub.
- What are eukaryotes' least favorite subject in school? Algaebra...
- What is 007's favorite subject at school? Chemistry, because he knows a lot about bonds!
- Why was Calculus Obama's favorite subject in school? They're both all about change.
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School Subject One Liners
Which school subject one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with school subject? I can suggest the ones about school exam and students related.
- What was the seal's favorite subject in school? ART ART ART!
- What is a feminists least favourite subject at school? Triggernometry.
- Whats a feminist's favorite subject in school? Trigonometry.
- What is the owl's favorite school subject? Owlgebra
- Which school subject was the witch's favorite? Spelling!
- My least favorite subject in school was Ancient History. The teachers tended to Babylon
- What is a North Korean's favorite school subject? Kimistry
- What is a chicken's favorite subject in school? Eggonomics!
- Dracula Why is Dracula's favorite subject in school Math? Because he likes to Count.
- Q: What is a snake's favorite subject in school?
A: Hissssstory. - Q: What is a witch's favorite subject in school?
A: Spelling. - What is a runner's favourite subject in school? Jog-raphy!
- What's a librarians favourite subject at school? Scilence
- Which school subject does a dog like? ART ART ART ART!
- What did the acorn say his favorite school subject was? Well, gee! I'm a tree!
School Subject Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.
What funny jokes about school subject you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean history subject jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make school subject pranks.
Dave took Mary out for a romantic dinner where conversation turned to the subject of marriage.
Dave had been saving for an engagement ring, but he was in graduate school and in dire need of a new computer.
Mary was understanding, telling Dave they had the rest of their lives to get engaged, so he should use his savings to buy a computer instead.
During dessert, Dave suddenly reached into his pocket and pulled out an engagement ring.
Mary was stunned, but after she collected herself, she looked up and prompted: "Well, don't you have something to ask me?"
Dave then got down on bended knee.
"Honey," he said, "Will you buy me a new computer?"
Theory Vs. Reality
So a boy comes home from school and his dad asks him "Hey son, how was school?" the boy replies "Pretty good dad, but my last subject was about theory and reality... and to be honest, I didn't get it at all". The dad takes a seat and says "Son, let me teach you. Go upstairs and ask your mother if she would have s**... with ANY man in the world, aside from me, for 1 million dollars." So the boy goes upstairs and asks his mother "Mom, would you have s**... with any guy aside from dad for a million dollars?" to which the mother replies "Well, your sister is going off to college and we just took a second mortgage on the house... yeah, I'd do it." So the boy goes downstairs to his dad and says "dad, she said she would do it for a million dollars!" So the father goes "Alright son, now go upstairs and ask your sister if she would have s**... with any guy but her boyfriend for a million dollars." the boy runs upstairs and asks his sister if she would have s**... with any guy but her boyfriend for a million dollars... she instantly says yes. the boy runs downstairs again and says "dad dad, she didn't even hesitate, she would do it!"
So the dad says "You see son? In theory, we're sitting on two million dollars. but in reality, we're living with a couple of w**..."
There is this Jewish boy who was born into a nice family...
There is this Jewish boy who was born into a nice family. He was a very smart boy, but he never did well in school because he lacked motivation. His parents tried everything: meeting with his teachers, one on one tutoring, etc.; however, nothing seemed to help. Eventually, they decided to send him to a private school, thinking a different environment would him good. Unfortunately, there are not many Jewish private schools, so they had to settle on sending him to a Catholic school. Surprisingly, this worked. The parents got his first report card and were astounded: all A's. The parents wondered what brought about the change. They said to their son "You made all A's! Even in math! (previously his worst subject) what changed?" The son replied "When I walked in on the first day and saw the Jewish guy nailed to the plus sign, I knew they were serious."
Birth
A teenager comes home from school and asks her mother "Is it true what Rita just told me? Babies come out of the same place where boys put their d**...?"
"Yes, dear" replies her mother, pleased that the subject had finally come up and she wouldn't have to explain it to her daughter.
"But then when I have a baby," responded the teenager "won't it knock my teeth out?"
The most famous person of all times
Who is the most famous person of all times. That was a subject of a contest among Catholic School's 5th graders with $100 prize. The teacher asked Jon first. He said it was Bill Clinton. The next one was Kevin who said it was Gorge Washington. After collecting responses from almost all participants the teacher with not much hope asked the last girl, Sarah, who happen to be Jewish. Sara raised and said. I think it was Jesus. The teacher was jubilant and pronounced Sarah as the winner of $100. After school the teacher approached Sarah and asked her. How come you as a Jew chose Jesus instead of Moses? To that Sarah replied. Sure, Moses is my hero, but business is business.
A very conservative couple was hesitant to talk to their daughter about s**......
Years pass and the girl keeps growing up, and they do everything they can to keep her innocent on the subject. She goes to high school and college and the only think they teach her that she should avoid men and be abstinent. Finally, the young woman is engaged to be married. Hesitantly, the parents decide it is time to have "the talk". The husband and wife sit down with their daughter and blushing say: Sweetheart, we think that it is time for us to talk about s**.... The daughter throws her hands up and says: "Finally! So... what would you like to know?"
The Jewish Kid at the Catholic School
A Jewish family just moved into a new town because of the fathers work and are looking for a good school for their son to attend. Since the public schools are notoriously terrible, they look to the private schools. After asking around, they learn that St. John's Academy is by far their best option. The boy is a great student and does well in every subject. Except math. Year after year he fails math. His parents are confused because he is such an excellent student in all other subjects. They even get him a tutor, but he continues to fail.
A few years later, they move again. Another new school. But this time it is a public school. He passes math the first semester with an A. His parents ask him why math had been so hard for him at St. John's.
He replied "Well in the classroom they had a picture of a guy nailed to a plus sign and I couldn't focus because I thought I was next!"
A grade school teacher was asking students what their parents did for a living.
A grade school teacher was asking students what their parents did
for a living.
"Tim, you be first," she said. "What does your mother do all day?"
Tim stood up and proudly said, "She's a doctor."
"That's wonderful. How about you, Amie?"
Amie shyly stood up, scuffed her feet and said, "My father is a mailman."
"Thank you, Amie," said the teacher. "What about your father, Billy?"
Billy proudly stood up and announced, "My daddy plays piano in a w**...."
The teacher was aghast and promptly changed the subject to geography.
Later that day she went to Billy's house and rang the bell. Billy's father answered the door. The teacher explained what his son had said and demanded an explanation.
Billy's father replied, "Well, I'm really an attorney. But how do you explain a thing like that to a seven-year-old child?"
A teenage girl come home from school and asks her mother, "Is it true what Rita just told me?"
"What's that?" asks her mother. "That babies come out of the same place where boys put their p**...?" said her daughter.
"Yes it is dear!" replies her mother, pleased that the subject had finally come up and that she wouldn't have to explain it to her daughter.
"But then, when I have a baby," responded the teenager, "won't it knock my teeth out?"
When I was a young boy, I was bad at Maths
I was so bad that I was expelled from my school for failing that subject so often. Because of this, my father sent me to Catholic school and after going for a year, my grades improved. The reason being, the second I walked through that door and saw the guy nailed to the fricking plus sign, I knew this school meant business.
A grade school teacher asks her students what their parents do for a living.
Billy proudly stands up and announces, "My daddy plays piano in a w**...."
The teacher is aghast and promptly changes the subject. Later that day, she calls Billy's mother and explains what Billy said.
Billy's mother says, "Actually, his father's an attorney, but how can we explain a thing like that to a seven-year-old?"
What is s**...?
A little boy returning home from his first day at school said to his mother, "Mom, what's s**...?" His mother, who believed in all the most modern educational theories, gave him a detailed explanation, covering all aspects of the tricky subject. When she had finished, the little lad produced an enrollment form which he had brought home from school and said, "Yes, but how am I going to get all that into this one little square?"
Zoology is an interesting subject...
For example, did you know that a school of piranhas can completely s**... the flesh from the bones of a child in 20 seconds?
Also, I lost my job at the zoo today...
An elephant is standing on a street corner with an e**....
His thing is HUGE, hangs all the way to the ground.
At that moment a mother is taking her son to school and the son looks at the elephant and says "Mommy what is that?"
Mom: "Oh that's the trunk honey"
Kid: "No mom, further back between the legs"
Mom: "Oh that? That's nothing...." and awkwardly changes the subject.
The next day, same elephant in the same condition is on the corner only this time the dad is taking the kid to school.
Kid: "Hey dad, what is that? It's not the the trunk and it's not the legs, it's in between the legs. Mommy says that's nothing."
The dad thinks for a second and then laughs, "Yeah well, mommy is spoiled."
Hey, does anybody remember that famous multi-personality patient who was the subject of the book Sybil that came out in the '70s? well, I went to high school with her!
A lot of the other kids kind of avoided her, but I thought she was good people.