Scaring Jokes
29 scaring jokes and hilarious scaring puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about scaring that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Scaring Short Jokes
Short scaring jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The scaring humour may include short frightening jokes also.
- Yesterday I had a nightmare that my tiktok account was deleted. For a second, I was really scared that I had a tiktok account.
- Chuck Norris looked directly at the sun today... And the sun got so scared it hid behind the moon.
- A guy in a plane stood up and shouted, HIJACK! All passengers got scared.
From the other end of the plane, a guy shouted back, HI JOHN! - Everyone knows why 6 was afraid of 7, but do you know why 10 was scared? 10 was in the middle of 9 11.
- Humans are scared of hippos because they're violent and responsible for hundreds of deaths per year, when in reality, people kill way more people per year... ...so that's just being hippocritical...
- I used to be scared of pretty girls, So my Mom explained that was silly, because they're much more scared of me.
- I asked my grandpa.. I asked my grandpa: After 65 years you still call grandma darling, beautiful and honey. What's the secret?
Grandpa: I forgot her name 5 years ago and I'm scared to ask her. - Nobody was scared when the clown invasion started at the beach I mean, it's just one boat they said. How bad can it be? .
- I heard a bunch of Chinese people chanting "We want rights! We want rights!" They must be scared of the dark or something.
- I am really scared of encountering cougars when I go on a run If I ever saw one , I'd Puma Pants .
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Scaring One Liners
Which scaring one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with scaring? I can suggest the ones about scare and fright.
- Why was 10 scared? He was in the middle of 9-11
- Scaring men is easy I just asked my husband if he remembers what today is..
- I want to make a joke about hurricane Harvey But I am scared my inbox will be flooded
- Apparently I snore so loudly that I scare everyone in the car I'm driving.
- I once got yelled at for peeing in a pool Scared me so much I almost fell in.
- I told my neighbor I was too scared to grow an apple tree. He said grow a pear.
- Apple farmers who are too scared to diversify should just grow a pear.
- In Iran, everyone's scared of spiders.. But in Iraq, no phobia.
- Scared of eating genetically modified fruit? Grow a pear.
- Why was Yoda scared of 7? Because 6 7 8.
- I'm scared of 5G It will only allow idiots to spread their conspiracy theories faster.
- Why didn't the dog want to go into outer space? Because he was scared of vacuums!
- I'd be very scared if I swallowed a cup of cement I'd be shittin' brick
- Why don't blind people like to skydive? It scares their dog
- How scared was the dinosaur? Petrified.
Gather Around for Fun Scaring Jokes and Laughter with Friends
What funny jokes about scaring you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean fearing jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make scaring pranks.
t**... holding dad at gunpoint-
t**...: "Say your last words!"
Dad: "Your last words!"
t**...: "What? ugh, you Americans. Be serious!"
Dad: "Okay, I'll be Sirius. Who are you going to be?"
t**...: "Stop. Why isn't this scaring your?"
Dad: "Nothing really scares me anymore; not since I saw that monster henway."
t**...: "What's a 'henway'"?
Dad: "About a pound and a half."
t**...: "Stop! I'm serious!"
Dad: "Hi Sirius! I'm Dad!"
What has 6 legs, red hair, and flies?
No, seriously. This thing is scaring the h**... out me.
A man would come home very late and very drunk every night.
His wife decides to teach him a lesson by dressing up like Satan and scaring him.
When he finally stumbles across the lawn, his wife jumps out and howls like a d**....
He looks at her and slurs, "You don't scare me. I'm married to your sister!"
My wife just asked me if I know what today is..
Scaring me is easy!
My favorite hobbies are getting n**..., and scaring people.
In that order.
The Stork family comes home at the end of the day
The storks sit down for dinner. Mama Stork says "Father Stork, what did you do today?"
Father Stork says "I was out making couples very happy. What did you do today Mama Stork?"
Mama Stork says "I also was out making couples very happy. What did you do today Baby Stork?"
Baby Stork says "I was out scaring the c**... out of college students."
(Cultural note: in many cultures, a common myth is that storks deliver babies to mothers instead of mothers giving birth)
After considering it for weeks, I finally decided to turn myself into the police.
It really wasn't worth it. Scaring people and stealing their drugs was fun, but getting busted for impersonation s**....
Did you hear about the scarecrow that's great at scaring away birds?
He is just outstanding in his field!
Do you know why New Zealand has banned blind people from bungee jumping?
It kept scaring the life out of the seeing eye dogs.
A doctor walks into the room and says, "Sir, you're going to have to stop m**...."
Guy says sarcastically, "Why? Because it will make me go blind?"
Doctor says, "No. You're scaring all of the patients."
One Time Long Ago, Way Back In Medieval Times...
There was a brave knight named Sir Finley who fought everything the king commissioned him to. One day, a dragon terrorized a nearby village, scaring the kingdom. Sir Finley was sent of to slay this terrible dragon. Once he got there, the dragon's tail knocked him off balance. Sir Finley fell to the dragon, and the dragon cut off his feet first when starting to cook.
Sir Finley was de-feet-ed.
I hate the people who shout "THIS IS THE POLICE, OPEN THE DOOR YOU CREEP". Who plays those kind of jokes anymore?
You're scaring my wife. She's only 12, jeez.
What did the disco goose say to the abrasive scarecrow?
You're scaring me, let me dance the night away.
