Santa Wife Jokes
40 santa wife jokes and hilarious santa wife puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about santa wife that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Santa Wife Short Jokes
Short santa wife jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The santa wife humour may include short santa is a woman jokes also.
- My wife just told me that in 9 months, I'm in for a big surprise... I can't wait for santa to come now!!
- There are no divorce courts at the North Pole, so when Santa and his wife wanted to split up, they got a semicolon.
They're great for separating independent Clauses. - Why did Santa get divorced? His wife found out that he went to other women's houses when he said he was working
- Where did Santa meet his wife? Conjunction Junction. They specialize in hooking up words, phrases, and Clauses
- What did Santa Claus say to his wife after he watched the weather report? It's going to rain dear.
^Yeah ^I'm ^sorry ^its ^late ^guys. - Why does Santa have no children? Because he only comes once a year.
Bonus! Why did Santa's wife divorce him?
She wasn't the only one receiving his "package". - My wife was doing her hair for Christmas Eve She seemed to be struggling to comb it. I told her she should have written to Santa about it - he could have told her if her hair was knotty or nice.
- I just realized that my wife is Santa Claus I just realized that my wife is Santa Claus. She only comes once a year.
- My nickname in the North Pole is 'comma' I had s**... with Santa's wife and separated the clauses
- Santa Claus is a d**...... He made my wife sit on his lap, asked if she's been naughty this year then laughed and repeatedly called her a h**....
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Santa Wife One Liners
Which santa wife one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with santa wife? I can suggest the ones about santa christmas and dressed santa.
- Why did Santa's wife leave him? He was an alcohohoholic.
- Why did Santa's helper see the doctor? Because he had a low "elf" esteem!
- How did Santa kill his wife He sleighed her
- What's does Santa Clause and my wife have in common? They both come once every year.
- Why did Santa want a divorce? His wife made sure he only came once a year.
- What do you call Santa's wife? Mrs Claus. I'll see myself out.
- What is the name of Santa's wife? Mary Christmas.
- What did Santa say when he caught his wife in bed with another guy? h**... h**... h**...!
- How did Santa know his wife was cheating on him? She was a h**... h**... h**...
- What do santa call his wife at christmas h**...! h**...! h**...!!!!
- Why did Santa's wife leave him? Because of his three h**...(e)s
- Santa Has anyone realized that Santa is a p**... he has a wife and 3 hos
Giggle-Inducing Santa Wife Jokes for Joyful Times with Friends
What funny jokes about santa wife you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean mall santa jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make santa wife pranks.
Santa and his wife had a messy divorce after they both got colostomies.
After encouragement from friends and family, they both joined the support group for people with colostomies ironically named The Semicolon. Due to the help and support they got, they ended up remarrying.
Two independent Clauses were able to be joined as a result of The Semicolon.
h**..., h**..., h**..., Merry Christmas!
This is what Santa Clause says when he sees your wife, mother and sister together in the same room.
Santa's wife has been sleeping around with a lot of people…
She has been kind of a h**... h**... h**...
What does Santa say when he meets your wife, your sister and your mother?
h**... h**... h**..., Merry Christmas!
What does Santa Claus say when he walks in and sees your mother, wife, and sister?
h**... h**... h**...
Cat drank the milk
Santa Singh was sleeping with his wife. In the morning, his wake up to get the milk from the door and came shouting back, Santa the cat drank the milk.
Santa got up from sleep and slapped her hard saying "how many times did I tell you to wear clothes while sleeping"....
A 40 year old couple are hiking in the woods
... They eventually stumble upon Santa Claus. "I will grant you one wish each!" Santa told them. "I want a new car!" The man said, "I want a new TV!" the woman said. Santa Claus, with a smile on his face ".. But on one condition". "and what's that?" the man said, already confused with the encounter. "you'll allow me to have good time with your wife". The couple was shocked and appealed, but eventually they agreed on the condition. Santa and the woman walked into the woods leaving the man behind waiting. After a while, both of them came back. "How old are you?" Santa asked the man, "forty three" the man answered. Santa Claus replied "And you still believe in Santa?"