Salesperson Jokes
22 salesperson jokes and hilarious salesperson puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about salesperson that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Salesperson Short Jokes
Short salesperson jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The salesperson humour may include short salesman jokes also.
- So I'm in Ikea.... ...and I ask the salesperson, "Is this a finished desk?"
and she says, "No, it's Swedish."
(edited to make more better) - A UNIX Salesperson A unix salesperson named Lenore
Loved her job, but loved the beach more.
She devised such a way
to combine work and play:
She sells C-shells by the seashore
- The happiest person I know is a lubricant salesperson... I guess you could say they don't have a lot of friction in their life.
- I wasn't making enough money as a keyboard percussionist so I started moonlighting as gun salesperson. I go from glockenspiel to Glock and spiel.
- Do you know the difference between a car salesperson and a software salesperson? The car salesperson knows when they're lying.
- I bet anyone who's undergone gender reassignment would make a great salesperson. Everything they do is a trans action.
- Salesperson at a big furniture store: "You put no money down and make no payments for 12 months!" Me (nervously): "Who told you about us?"
- Shopping for a new mattress and the salesperson s**... What kind of salesman refuses to be the little spoon?
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Salesperson One Liners
Which salesperson one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with salesperson? I can suggest the ones about sales people and salesman up.
- What do you call a bald spot on a cell phone salesperson? A gap in coverage.
- What did the salesperson say to the little boy wanting a gold-plated dreidel? Je-wish!
- What does a bird who is also a salesperson say? Cheap cheap cheap cheap cheap.
- I went on a date with a Vacuum Salesperson last night... It s**....
Gather Around for Fun Salesperson Jokes and Laughter with Friends
What funny jokes about salesperson you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean car salesman jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make salesperson pranks.
A blonde walked into an electronics store and said to the salesmen: "I want that tv."
The salesperson shook his head and said, "No, we don't sell to blondes."
So the blonde left and came back with her hair dyed brown and said: "I'll take that tv."
Again the salesman said: "No, we don't sell to blondes."
So she left again and came back with her hair dyed black and said: "I want that tv."
But the salesman still said: "No, we don't sell to blondes."
Finally the blonde got fed up and said, "That's it! How'd you know I was a blonde?!" she asked.
The salesman answered: "Cause that's a microwave.
I went in for a job interview today...
The manager, looking for a great salesperson, picked up a laptop and said "sell me this laptop".
I proceeded to stick it under my armpit and walk out.
A few minutes later, the manager called my cellphone upset saying "bring it back!!!"
I said "i'll sell it to you for $200 bucks!"
My brother works in the garage door business
I asked him how it is. He said it has its ups and downs.
He's really happy for the job, though. The opportunity was really an open door for him.
Apparently they've made him into their main salesperson, since he really knows how to close the deal.
I hope you found these puns to be....uplifting.
A blind man walks into a department store...
He takes the leash of his seeing-eye dog and starts swinging the poor dog around above his head.
"Um... Sir? Can I help you?" asks the salesperson.
"No thanks," replies the blind man. "I'm just looking around."
A little girl walks into a pet store...
and says, "I'd wike a wabbit pweathe."
The salesperson laughs and mimics the little girl's speech impediment. "Of courthe! Do you want a widdle bwown wabbit, a bwack wabbit, or a thpotted wabbit?"
The little girl says, "I don't think my thnake giveth a thit what color the wabbit ith."
A favorite joke from my Dad
Eric walks into a plant nursery. Surrounded by lush potted plants, he selects an attractive hibiscus and proceeds to casually eat the leaves from its branches. A concerned salesperson walks up to him quickly.
"May I help you?" The salesperson asks.
"No thanks," answers Eric, "I'm just browsing."
A store manager watches from a distance as a salesperson argues with a customer.
After a few minutes, the customer storms out of the store.
I saw what just happened, the manager says, and I guess you've forgotten my motto of 'the customer is always right.'
I know, the salesperson says, but . . .
No buts, says the manager. The customer is always right.
Fine, responds the salesperson.
What were you two arguing about? the manager asks.
The salesperson answers, He called you an idiot.
