Safari Jokes
40 safari jokes and hilarious safari puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about safari that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Looking for some funny safari jokes? We've got you covered! Check out our collection of hilarious jokes about all things safari-related.
Funniest Safari Short Jokes
Short safari jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The safari humour may include short google chrome jokes also.
- Today I pitched a new web software to Apple to replace Safari... it raised a few iBrowse :(
- I'm not brave enough to go on a real Safari, so I decided to be an Internet Explorer instead. Sadly even that was too Edge-y for me!
- What do you get when you mate and Elephant with a Rhino? You get thrown out of the Safari Park
- I was on a trip in Africa when I was asked to rate the tour guide. To which I responded Safaris pretty good.
- Why did the jaguars stop playing poker at the safari? Because all the others were cheetahs.
- Donald Trump goes to Africa in safari, but they only show him a photo of some wildebeests. Fake gnus!
- What do you do when you're on Safari and all of a sudden come across an Elephant? Very gently,
Wipe it off - A safari trip is a trip to the safari. An Alaska trip is a trip to Alaska.
However, an acid trip is not a trip to acid. It's a trip to the safari in Alaska. - A friend of mine killed a lion on a safari.... ...and instead of hanging the head on a mantle he hung its behind. He asked me what I think and I replied "I think it's a catastrophe."
- Internet Explorer, Google Chrome and Safari walk into a bar. Google Chrome asks for a stiff drink. Safari asks for a heavy drink... Internet Explorer asks for a frozen drink.
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Safari One Liners
Which safari one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with safari? I can suggest the ones about internet explorer and explorer.
- I just won a free ticket to go on an African safari! kenya believe it?
- What do you call a broken compass? Safari.
- What do you call the jacket on a semi-formal safari suit? A trailblazer.
- Safari #1 rule. Never be the slowest runner in the group.
- Where do safari animals buy their groceries? From the supermeerkat
- Adding anyone comment need to no my safari
- Friend Safari and Good Trades :)
African Safari Jokes
Here is a list of funny african safari jokes and even better african safari puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- In an African Safari, A LION suddenly bounced on Donald's wife. WIFE - Shoot him! Shoot him!
Donald - Yes Yes. I'm changing the battery of my camera.
Comical Safari Jokes and Gems that Will Get You in Laughter Land
What funny jokes about safari you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean web browser jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make safari pranks.
A very religious man went on a safari
When he was there, he found a huge lion. The man didn't have a gun and there was no way he could outrun the lion. So, he did the only thing he could do. He got on his knees and prayed "Dear God, I was always a good Christian. Will you perform a miracle and give this lion some christian feelings".
That moment, the clouds parted and a beam of light came from above and touched the lion's heart. The lion raised his paws to the heavens and loudly prayed "Thank you Lord for this meal I'm about to receive."
PS: it was a beam of light.
PPS: 12 700 upvotes and 17 awards. Thank you so much. I haven't been this happy since Xmas.
I was on a safari in africa when I saw two male lions having s**... with each other in the open.
I thought to myself, Have they got no pride?
An Australian on safari...
An Aussie is tramping through a jungle with his hunting gear. He comes into a clearing and finds a stunningly beautiful n**... women sprawled out across a bed of leaves.
"My god," he says. "Are you game?"
She smiles invitingly, "Yes I am."
So he shoots her.
A man goes on safari with his wife and mother-in-law. Whilst stretching their legs outside the jeep a lion jumps out of the bushes and corners the mother-in-law
The man's wife screams at her husband 'Please! can't you do anything to help!'
The man replies 'The lion got itself into this mess, it can get itself out'
A lion is drinking from a puddle and his tail is up.
A gorilla walks up behind him, seizes the opportunity and has his way with him.
The gorilla takes off and the lion takes off after him. The gorilla runs into a hunter's camp, jumps into a tent, puts on a safari outfit and a pith helmet, grabs a copy of The Johannesburg Times, sits down and pretends to read.
The lion runs into the camp, sticks his head into the tent and roars, "Arrgg! Did a gorilla come through here?"
The gorilla says, "You mean the one that nailed you from behind?"
The lion says, "You mean it's in the paper already?"
A big game hunter goes on safari with his wife and his mother-in-law.
One morning, the wife wakes up to find her mother gone. Immediately, she awakens up her husband and they both set off to find the old woman.
Suddenly, they break into a clearing and there's the mother-in-law, standing face-to-face with a ferocious lion!
"Quick, darling," the wife shouts frantically, "Do something!"
"Oh, no," the husband says, "That lion got himself into this mess. Let him get himself out!"
Lost in africa
Two friends became lost during a safari in Africa. Whilst discussing how to find their way out, they heard a viscous snarl to their left. Upon looking they saw what appeared to be a very hungry leopard. At that sight, one of them bent down and started tightening his shoe laces.
His friend said ''Hey are you crazy!!!! You can't outrun a leopard.''
His friend replied, '' Mate, i don't have to,I just have to outrun you!!!!''
African Safari
A young couple went on a safari to Africa, accompanied by the woman's mother.
On the second day, they got separated from their party and found themselves in a remote part of the jungle. Suddenly, a lion jumped out of the undergrowth and stood growling ferociously in front of the mother-in-law.
"Quick, George!" screamed his wife, "do something!"
"Not b**... likely," he replied, "that lion got himself into this mess, he can get himself out of it again."
d**...
A guy was planning his holiday with his travel agent...
Last year you suggested The Maldives and when I returned my wife was pregnant. The year before that you suggested a safari in Africa and when I returned my wife was pregnant. And before that you suggested Bali and when I returned my wife was pregnant. Can you suggest somewhere cheaper this year so that I can take her with me!
I was at a Safari, when the guide told us, If you ever see a lion charging, reach behind your back and fling some p**... at the lion to startle him.
Me: Where will I find the p**...?
Guide: Trust me, it'll be there.
A friend came back to our country after being in a safari in the wild
He told me the experience was marvelous, except for one bit. He strayed far away from the guides and crew and then, found himself in front of a lion. He proceeded to run. So did the lion, although this one slipped a few times, giving the chance to my friend of escaping, unscathed.
I was shocked after hearing this and, asked him if he didn't s**... himself or anything after seeing the lion. He replied: "Of course! In what do you think the lion slipped on?"
What happened when the mad scientist fused two animals together on his safari?
*shrugs* "Elephrhino!"
My girlfriend slapped me when she got this joke, so I figured it was good enough for reddit
surgeon's disappointing holiday
A famous surgeon went on a safari in Africa. When he came back, his colleagues asked him how it had been. "Oh, it was very disappointing"' he said. "I didn't kill a thing. I'd have been better off staying here in the hospital."
Mr. And Mrs. Jones were on a safari
in the darkest part of Africa. They were walking cautiously through the jungle when suddenly a huge lion sprang out in front of them, seized Mrs. Jones in its jaws and started to drag her off into the bush. "Shoot!" She screamed to her husband, "shoot!" "I can't!", he yelled back "My phone battery just died!"
Why did Steve Jobs die of cancer?
Because he searched for a medicine in Safari and not Google Chrome.
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Don't let the children feed a lion, apparently lions will eat humans if given the chance.
Anyways, I lost my job as a safari tour guide today...
