The Best 36 Rural Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Rural jokes. There are some rural vermont jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these rural farmland puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Rural Jokes and Puns

rural upbringin'

What do you call a bunch of tractors parked in front of a McDonald's on Friday night in Wisconsin?

Prom night.

The mailman

A mailman gets a new route in a rural community. Walking up to a isolated little farmhouse, he sees a woman out back getting hammered by a goat.

He looks at the kid sitting on the porch, and asks him "Hey kid, doesn't it bother you, what your mom's doing back there?"

The kid looks at him and says "NAAAAAAA!"

A plane from J.F.K. is coming in to land at a rural airport in Arkansas at midnight.

Mouthy pilot turns to his co-pilot, winks & says "watch this"......
"Pilot to control tower......hey there Hillbilly, guess who!!"
Control tower switches off the airport lights.....
"Control tower to pilot....... Hey there Yankee, guess *where!!*"

Rural joke, A plane from J.F.K. is coming in to land at a rural airport in Arkansas at midnight.

Meanwhile in rural Ireland...

Paddy pays a visit to his old friend Tommy one afternoon. Tommy takes a seat in the kitchen whilst Paddy makes him a cup of coffee. Tommy, being the inquisitive type, says "I can't help but notice there Paddy that ye have a lot of empty milk bottles in your fridge so ye do, why exactly would that be?"
To which Paddy replies " Oh thats just in case a visitor wants a black coffee"

What do you call a swimming hole in the middle of a farm?

A rural pool.


A man counterfeits $18 bills...

...and needs to get rid of them, so he takes a trip through rural Iowa. Coming to a small general store at a remote crossroads, he goes in and asks the old man behind the counter if he would please break his bill. The old man replies, "Sure, would you like 2 nines or 3 sixes?"

My grandpa would always tell me...

that when he was growing up, in rural Texas, his momma would give him $1 and send him down to the store. He'd come back with 2 loaves of bread, half a gallon of milk, a carton of eggs, and a pound of pork. He says you can't do that now-a-days, way too many security cameras.

Rural joke, My grandpa would always tell me...

The difference between rural, suburban, and urban.

- If you stand naked on the front porch and the neighbors can't see you, it's rural.
- If you stand naked on the front porch and the neighbors call the cops, it's suburban.
- If you stand naked on the front porch and the neighbors ignore you, it's urban.

Credit to someone on /u/jasonreid1976's Facebook.

An Australian is visiting England...

He is from a small rural town and he does not know anything about traffic laws and street lights. He crosses a street and almost gets hit by a car. A police officer sees him and screams: "Oi! Did you come here to die?" The Australian replies with: "Nah mate, I came here yesterday!"

Christmas in rural America

I live in rural America. On Christmas morning occasionally I will hear gun shots in the distance. This means one of two things:
1) Someone got a new gun for Christmas
2) Someone didn't

I'm not saying the rural county I live in is full of hicks but instead of Uber

We have Goober

You can explore rural kentucky reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean rural outskirts dad jokes. There are also rural puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


Alabama college kid visiting Boston

So this Alabama Crimson Tide football player is visiting Boston. He's at a party and sees this pretty blonde girl, want to chat her up.
Goes over and says "What college does you go to?" She's not impressed by his down south accent and general rural hick ways, so she says "Yale." and looks away.
He lean over to her ear and says "WHAT COLLEGE DOES YOU GO TO?"

Since he is a country singer...

Shouldn't Keith Urban's last name be Rural?

One day in 1960's China...

Mao told his chief of police to send 10,000 intellectuals and a clown to rural exile. The police chief asked "Why the clown?" Mao laughed and said "That's the spirit!"

What did the depressed rural estate agent do?

Sell farm

What's the official State pie of rural Alabama?

Pumpkin

Rural joke, What's the official State pie of rural Alabama?

What does a police officer in rural Pennsylvania say when he sees suspicious behavior?

"Hmm, something's Amish here."

If there is an Urban Dictionary...

...Shouldn't there be a Rural Dictionary

Credits to my friend Portia.

My sister is a teacher in our rural district. During afternoon class, she had a flyswatter hanging out of her back pocket. One of her students said she looked like she was fixin' to show a hog !


Donald Trump's advisers worry he could lose support from his base, so they suggested he change his hairstyle to better connect with white, rural voters...

...he's going to mullet over.

What do you call a BBW from rural Ontario?

Thunder Bae.

What do you call a sheep tied to a pole in rural Ireland?

A sperm bank

What do you call a rural drug dealer?

A Farmacist

Why was the department of alcohol tobacco and firearms created?

To regulate the 3 leading causes of death in rural America.

I'm taking the Manic Street Preachers around rural England.

If they tolerate Diss, then the Chilterns will be next.

Young Bill

Young Bill was courting Mabel, from the adjoining cattle ranch.

One evening, as they sat on Bill's porch watching the sun go down over the western hills, Bill spied his prized stallion humping one of his mares.

He sighed in contentment at this idyllic rural scene and figured the omens were right for him to put the move on Mabel.

He leaned over and whispered in her ear, "Mabel, I'd sure like to do what that stallion is doing."

Mabel whispered back, "Go ahead. She's your mare!"

Why are there so many unreported crimes in rural Alabama?

Because they're one big, happy family.

A buck wearing a robe and clutching a bible was found dead near a rural highway...

The person who found the animal exclaimed "Deer Lord" upon its discovery.

How do rural bankers speak?

Withdrawl

A guy is driving through a rural area

when he sees a farmer holding a pig up to a tree so the pig can eat apples.
He stops his car and shouts to the farmer, 'Isn't that a waste of time?'
'Shoot'. says the farmer, 'what's time to a pig?'

Mark and his wife were driving along a country road.

They weren't speaking to each other due to an earlier argument. As they passed a particularly rural stretch, they spotted a couple of monkeys in the treetops. "Relatives of yours?", asked Mark sarcastically.

"Yes," she replied. "My in-laws."

Tried translating a joke from Latvian.

John, a rural farmer, decided to visit the zoo in the capital with his family. He has a lot of fun, and comes back ecstatic. His neighbor
Tolya asks him what he saw there.

"Well, I saw a giraffe."

"What's a giraffe?"

"Well, you know horses?"

"Yeah."

"It's like a horse, but really tall and with a long neck."

"Okay, what else?"

"Zebra."

"Zebra?"

"Well, you know horses?"

"Yeah."

"It's like a horse, but with stripes."

"Okay, what else then?"

"I saw a hippo. "

"What's that?"

"You know horses?"

"Yeah?"

"Like a horse, but big and fat."

"Hm. Okay. Anything else?"

"Yes... a crocodile."

"What's a crocodile?"

"You know horses?"

"Yeah?"

"Nothing like one."

A politician visited a small remote rural town and asked the inhabitants what the government could do for them.

"We have two big needs," said the Town Mayor. "First, we have a clinic but no doctors."

The politician whipped out his cellphone, spoke for a while and then said, "I have sorted it out. A doctor will arrive here tomorrow. What is your other need?"

"We have no cell phone reception at all in our town.

A wake for my mother-in-law

Two rural gentlemen were chatting. One says, "Say, I noticed a lot of cars at your house on Saturday night. Were you having a party or something?"

"No," responds the second man. "Tragically last week one of my mules kicked my mother in law in the head, and she died suddenly"

"Oh, No!" says the first man. "So were the people there to pay their final respects?"

"No," says the second man. "Once news started to spread about the incident, men from all over the county started coming over asking if they could borrow my mule."

Politicians these days.

A politician visited a remote little rural village and asked the inhabitants what the government could do for them.

We have two big needs, said the village headman. First, we have a hospital but no doctor.

The politician whipped out his cellphone, spoke for a while and then said: I have sorted it out. A doctor will arrive here tomorrow. What is your other need?

We have no cellphone reception at all in our village.

Dating in rural towns is strange.

When a girl says daddy it's hard to tell if it's a fetish thing or if she's thinking about her ex.

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the rural countryside jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working rural arizona piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

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