Rugby Jokes

Need a laugh? Look no further than our collection of funny rugby jokes! From flirty rugby puns to jokes about Welsh rugby, FIFA, ESPN and lacrosse, we've got something for everyone. Laugh away!

Comedy Rugby Jokes to Make Your Friends Giggle

What rugby position does Stevie Wonder play?

Blindside flanker.

Rugby vs hockey

Soccer is running around for 90 minutes faking an injurie while rugby is running around for 90 minutes ignoring an injury

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Do you play rugby?

Because you look like a h**...

the rugby players without a referee weren't keeping up with the news

they kept asking "whose put-in?"

An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman are drinking in a bar...

-You know - says the Englishman - I have 10 sons. That is almost a soccer team.

-That's nothing. - says the Irishman - I have 14 sons. That is almost a rugby team.

-Well - says the Scotsman - I have 17 daughters. That is almost a golf course.

Why can't ever ever win when I play Rugby 08?

Rugby joke, Why can't ever ever win when I play Rugby 08?

England at the Rugby World Cup

Just found a carrier bag with an England rugby shirt in the rubbish bin,

can't believe someone would throw that away! Worth 5p that!

Australia beat England in their matchup in the Rugby World Cup.

I guess you could say the prisoners beat the guards.

So the English rugby team...

Don't you hate it when the punchline is in the title?!

You can explore rugby lacrosse reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean rugby quarterback dad jokes. There are also rugby puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.

An Englishman walks into a bar...

There's usually a Scotsman, Irishman and Welshman too, but they're still at the Rugby World Cup.

[rugby] Looks like Australia was in trouble there for a while...

But in the end they got off Scot-free.

How can you tell a gamer from a rugby player?

Ask them if they play league.

My girlfriend is the best h**... in the country

All her fellow rugby players agree.

Why are Jedi terrible at Rugby?

Because "There is no Try."

Rugby joke, Why are Jedi terrible at Rugby?

Everything England has accomplished has been bettered by other nations - rugby, cricket and now at football...

Even the Russians have better hooligans than us.

Just heard 80's singer Enya has bought hew own Rugby Union team.

Their next 3 fixtures are now:
Sale (A)
Sale (A)
Sale (A)

Britons vs. Americans

It's Mom not Mum
It's Chips not Crisps
It's Fries not Chips
It's Color not Colour
It's Soccer not Football
It's Football not Rugby

It's School not Shooting Range.

Why can't Jesus play rugby?

He won't support the h**...

Considering the names of other similar sports...

somebody really dropped the ball when naming rugby.

Jedi s**... at rugby. . .

Because with them, there is no try.

Why are Jedi so bad at rugby?

Because there is no try.

People think I have ADHD and I really don't..

To prove it I'll give you 10 reasons why Football is better than rugby

"Dad, I'm going to play rugby with my friends ... you know where the ball inflator is?"

Dad: "Go to look for it ... it must be cooking."

An Englishman, a Welshman and an Arab met over coffee.. a convention.

''I am happily married,'' said the Englishman, ''and have 10 children. One more and I shall have my own football team."

''I am happily married,'' said the Welshman ''and have 14 children. One more and I shall have my own Rugby team."

''I am also happily married,'' said the Arab ''and have 17 wives. One more and I shall have my own Golf course.''

Rugby joke, An Englishman, a Welshman and an Arab met over coffee..


It's Mum not Mom
It's crisps not chips
It's chips not fries
It's football not soccer
It's rugby not football
It's school not shooting range!

What happens when you win a raffle twice that gave you five for the price of three on rugby tickets?

You won two, three for five six nations tickets

I broke my collarbone the other day playing rugby.

It was worth a try.

My girlfriend said she's leaving me because I say she's not very good at rugby.

I'd like to see her try.

I've always thought : this is weird that Prince Harry loves rugby that much

I mean, his own mother was killed by a pillar

I was a little mad today. My flight went all the way across the Andes and all i got was a bag of peanuts to eat...

I heard another flight went only halfway over and they got a whole rugby player

TIL that Sir Paul McCartney once turned down nearly $64 million to appear on an American talk show because he wanted to stay home and watch his favorite sport on TV.

It was *Ellen* or rugby.

As a Brit, I can't get into American football

They rugby the wrong way

Bar Joke

A blind guy on a bar stool shouts to the bartender, "Wanna hear a blonde joke?"

In a hushed voice, the guy next to him says, "Before you tell that joke, you should know something.

Our bartender is blonde, the bouncer is blonde. I'm a 6' tall, 200 lb black belt. The guy sitting next to me is 6'2, weighs 225 and he's a rugby player. The fella to your right is 6'5" pushing 300 and he's a wrestler. Each one of US is blonde. Think about it, Mister. Do you still wanna tell that joke?"

The blind guy says, "Nah, not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times."

An Aussie and a Kiwi are sitting at a pub, downing a few beers, after a game of rugby.

The Kiwi turns to the Aussie and says, "Bro, if I shagged your wife over a railing and got her pregnant, would it make us related?"

To which the Aussie replies, "Dunno, mate, but I do know it'll make us even."

Remember that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes that make girls laugh. Many of the rugby football vs rugby puns are supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When a joke goes too far, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke becomes inappropriate.

We suggest you to use only working rugby rugby union piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and make them laugh.

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