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Rowing Jokes

41 rowing jokes and hilarious rowing puns to laugh out loud. Read sport jokes about rowing that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Check out these hilarious rowing jokes to make coxswains, crew members, and even landlubbers laugh. Filled with puns and gags about rowing, swims, oars, and dinghies, these jokes will entertain and amuse anyone interested in the sport of rowing.

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Funniest Rowing Short Jokes

Short rowing jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The rowing humour may include short rolling jokes also.

  1. I just got kicked out of karaoke night for singing "Danger Zone" six times in a row… They said I exceeded my maximum number of Loggins attempts…
  2. Do you know how to confuse a coal miner? Show him a row of shovels and tell him to take his pick.
  3. A guard asks a woman on death row what she'd like for her final meal. idk, what do you want?
  4. I'll have you know, I've been sober for just over 100 days. Not like, in a row or anything...just in general.
  5. At the hearings, Kavanaugh was asked how he would prefer to cross a waist deep river, in a rowboat or simply walk across it He said he doesn't want to give an opinion on Row Vs. Wade
  6. Girls say I'm an animal in bed. More specifically a koala. I can sleep for 22 hours in a row.
  7. My dad taught me to swim by rowing me to the middle of a lake and tossing me overboard... It was pretty easy once I got out of the bag!
  8. A woman on death row is asked what she would like for her last meal. I dunno, what do you want?
  9. I'm happy to announce that I've been sober for 40 days! Not in a row or anything. Just total.
  10. A male prison guard asks a woman on death row what she would like for her last meal. She replies, "I don't know, what do you want to eat?"

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Rowing One Liners

Which rowing one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with rowing? I can suggest the ones about rolls and riding.

  1. What has 80 feet, 137 teeth and $72 in cash? The front row of a Trump rally
  2. What has 132 legs and 8 teeth? The front row of a Toby Keith concert.
  3. What has 72 legs and 26 teeth? The first row of a country concert.
  4. I can't believe I forgot to go to the gym today That's 7 years in a row now
  5. Amish men can't motorboat their wives. They can only row boat them.
  6. When rowing a boat, do you use the left paddle or the right paddle? Either oar.
  7. Could Jennifer or Courtney Row? No, but Lisa Kudrow.
  8. If your rowing boat turns upside down, you can wear it as a hat.. It's capsized.
  9. Here I am: 100 days sober Not in a row or anything, just total.
  10. If my wife was on Death Row her last meal would be I don't know. What do you feel like?
  11. What do you call a row of bunnies going backwards? A receding hare line.
  12. Apparently the British hated rows, which was why they columnised so many places
  13. What's the cuban national anthem? "Row, Row, Row Your Boat..."
  14. Why did the producer of Dirty Jobs get fired? He was a Mike Rowe manager.
  15. What has 108 legs and 10 teeth? The front row at any country concert.

Crew Rowing Jokes

Here is a list of funny crew rowing jokes and even better crew rowing puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • Why did the rowing coach give his crew an asteroid? To make them meteor.
  • Do you know why they don't allow prostitutes on crew teams? Because h**... are hard to row.
Rowing joke, Do you know why they don't allow prostitutes on crew teams?

Howlingly Hilarious Rowing Jokes for an Unforgettable Evening

What funny jokes about rowing you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean spin jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make rowing pranks.

U.S. navy destroyer stops four Mexicans rowing towards Texas. The Captain gets on the loud-hailer and shouts:

Ahoy, small craft. Where are you headed?"

One of the Mexicans puts down his oar, stands up, and shouts, "g**..., we are invading the United States of
America to reclaim the territory taken by the USA during the 1800's."

The entire crew on the destroyer doubles over in laughter.

When the Captain finally catches his breath, he gets back on the loud-hailer and asks, "Just the four of you?"

The same Mexican stands up again and shouts, "No, we're the last 4. The other 20 million are already there.

Tommy comes back off his holiday with his mum and his step dad and the teacher asks him...

"Hello Tommy, did you enjoy your holiday?"
"I did Teacher"
"And did your stepdad take you out, show you things, go exploring?"
"Yes he did teacher, he took me out rowing 1/2 a mile into the lake every day, and then I'd swim back."
"Oh, well, um, it's an awful long way to swim isn't, 1/2 a mile?"
"Oh no teacher, no, it was easy once I'd got out of the bag!"

A U. S. Navy destroyer stops four Mexicans in a row boat rowing towards California...

The captain gets on the loud-hailer and shouts, "Ahoy, small craft. Where are you headed?"

One of the Mexicans puts down his oar, stands up, and replies, "We are invading the United States of America to reclaim the territory taken by the USA during the 1800s."
The entire crew of the destroyer doubled-over in laughter. When the captain was finally able to catch his breath, he gets back on the loud-hailer and asks, "Just the four of you?"

The same Mexican stands up again and shouts, "No, we're the last four. The rest are already there!"

A blonde saved enough money to buy a convertible.

So she goes out for a drive into the country. Top down, music blaring, what people stereotypically do in convertibles.
She gets to the middle of a field, and sees her friend, who is also blonde, rowing in a boat. In the middle of a field.
She puts her car in park and steps out.
What are you doing?! She yells.
Can't you see I'm boating? Her friend replies.
You're in the middle of a field! You can't row a boat in the middle of a field! It's blondes like you that make blondes like me look bad! I'd go out there and tell you off, but I don't know how to swim.

A blonde was driving down the highway and noticed another blonde rowing a boat in the middle of a dirt field

She pulled over to the side of the road and yelled,
It's blondes like you that give the rest of us a bad name!
And continued, you're lucky I can't swim, or I'd come over there and kick your a**...!

A highly successful blonde business woman was headed west

She was on her way to a work conference, driving through Arkansas.
As she's cruising along she comes across a farm and out in the middle of the field is a blonde in a rowboat, surrounded by cows, rowing like mad and going nowhere.
She's p**.... She pulls over and jumps out of her car, runs up to the fence, and begins shouting.
"I don't know who the h**... you are, but you're giving all of us blondes a bad name. If I could swim, I'd come over there and kick your a**...!"

Ah, blondes.

Two blondes are driving through farm country. As they are chatting and enjoying the scenery, they notice something unusual and pull over to investigate.
There they see, in the middle of a wheat field, a blonde sitting in a boat rowing furiously but obviously not going anywhere.
After watching for a few minutes, the first blonde says this really p**...me off. Dumb blondes like that one give the rest of us a bad name!
The second blonde says I agree. And if I could swim, I'd go out there and kick her a**...!

After 3 weeks at sea, the captain speaks to the oarmen. "I know its been rough seas, and tough rowing, but I've got some good news and bad news for you. The good news is you all get to change underwear....

...the bad news is, George you change with Bob. James, you change with Bill. John, you change with Ed, Rob you change.........."

Two blondes were driving in a car

They observed another blonde rowing a boat out in the middle of a grassy field. They first blonde turned to the second and said "it's blondes like that that give us a bad name". "Yeah" said the second blonde, "and if I could swim, I'd go out there and drown her"

Two men are in the desert and they see a third man fishing.

The first man says to the other: Look at that idiot fishing in the desert.
The second man replies: That's none of our business, just keep rowing.

2 Blondes drive past corn field

They see another blonde, in the middle of the field in a row boat, rowing away.
"It's blondes like that that give the rest of us a bad name!" one complains to the other. "Yeah! If I could swim, I'd teach her a lesson!" replied the other

I looked up the results of a french rowing race

Turns out my favorite boat got sank.

Why do New Zealanders always do well at rowing?

Because it combines the two things they are best at,
sitting down,
and going backward....

If the beavers are rowing their canoe down main st and the wheels fall off, how many pancakes will it take to shingle a dog house?

Seven because ice cream has no bones

An Egyptian man was sailing down a river

When his boat started to leak. He kept on rowing further down the river, whilst more and more water started to pour in. The man ignored the problem and just continued to sail down the river. Eventually his boat was nearly fully submerged and it quickly started to sink. The man refused to come to terms with his situation and just kept trying to row down the river.
He was in de Nile

Watching Olympic rowing with my wife.

Me: Oh, the announcer just said the Germans got in via the repechage.
Wife: What's that?
Me: I have no clue.
Wife: I think it means they went through Belgium.

Two penguins are in a rowboat

They are rowing across the Saharan desert in a rowboat, after about three days they have only made it about a mile. The one penguin looks at the other penguin and says "Wears the paddles" the other penguin replies "sure does"

They just opened a Gold's Gym in Havana, Cuba

I'd like to see the line for that rowing machine...

Two penguins are rowing a boat in a vast desert of sand.

Where's your oar? Asks one to the other. Sure do. The other reply's.

A fisherman is sitting on a river bank. Suddenly, he hears somebody shout 'F*c**... off!' in the distance.

Ten minutes later he hears the same shout 'F*c**... off!!!!!', but a bit closer. The fisherman shrugs his shoulders having no idea of what's going on.
Another ten minutes later when he has already forgotten about the strange shout, he sees a boat with a man rowing up the river… with spoons. So the fisherman asked:
- Hey! Why are you rowing with spoons? Take the oars!
- F*c**... off!!!!!!!!!!

Not to say I have trouble working out...

But I sat on the rowing machine and it sank.

Rowing joke, Not to say I have trouble working out...

jokes about rowing