Roused Jokes
5 roused jokes and hilarious roused puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about roused that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Uproarious Roused Jokes to Share with Friends
What is a good roused joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.
Quaker home defense
one night john had come home for the day, exhausted from being plain and keeping thoughts to himself and went straight to bed. During the night someone broke in and this roused him from his sleep. leaping into action john grabbed his musket and charged downstairs. upon meeting the robber he leveled his musket and yelled
"friend I don't mean to alarm you but you're standing between me and where I want to shoot"
Becky was on her deathbed...
Becky was on her deathbed.
Her husband, Jake, was maintaining a vigil by her side. He held her fragile hand, tears ran down his face. His praying roused her from her slumber.
She looked up and her pale lips began to move slightly.
My darling Jake," she whispered.
"Hush, my love," he said. "Rest. Shhh.Don't talk."
She was insistent. "Jake," she said in her tired voice. " I have something I must confess to you."
"There's nothing to confess," replied the weeping Jake. Everything's all right, go to sleep ."
"No, no. I must die in peace, Jake. I slept with your brother, your best friend and your father." "I know," he replied. "That's why I poisoned you"
A man is bragging to his coworkers
"I may be old but I've still got it! Last night, my wife and I went six-rounds! This morning we woke up and she said to me, 'honey you were amazing!'"
Another, roused by competition, said:
"Well last night my wife and I had fifteen-rounds! This morning she said to me, 'honey, I'm never leaving you'".
The last man didn't really speak all this time, so they looked at him asked "well, how many rounds did you go for last night?"
"Just one"
They smirked and sneered, "well, what did she say to you this morning?"
"Don't stop"
Sam was dying.
His wife, Carol, was maintaining a candlelight vigil by his side. She held
his fragile hand, with tears running down her face. Her praying roused him
from his slumber.
He looked up and his pale lips began to move slightly.
"My darling Carol," he whispered.
"Hush, my love," she said. "Rest. Shhh, don't talk."
In his tired voice, "I have something I must confess to you."
"There's nothing to confess," replied the weeping Carol.
"Everything's all right, just go to sleep."
No, no. I must die in peace, Carol I...I cheated on you!"
"I know," Carol whispered as she softly stroked his forehead.
"Just let the poison work".
Racist joke. If you're going to get offended just don't read it.
A young black kid observed that there seemed to be some advantages in being white, so he went off and painted himself white all over. He went and showed his mother who roused on him, and told him to go and show his father. This he did, and his father not only roared at him for being so silly, but cuffed him over the ears and sent him on his way. The boy went on and sat on his favorite log pondering his position and feeling very glum. His mate came along and asked him what was wrong. "I've only been a white kid for half and hour," he replied, "and I hate those
black b**... already!"
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