A solid 10, but also imaginary.

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Now I just have beer.

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..is 25.8069758 the root of all evil?

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She's a perfect ten but imaginary

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does that mean that 25.8069758011 is the root of all evil?

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Perfect 10, but imaginary

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A perfect ten... but completely imaginary.

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when I told them I have a girlfriend. They said she was like the square root of -100, a solid 10 but imaginary.

Well, joke is on them. They are also imaginary.

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Sorry, did that not make any sense?

How about -

>"A dozen, a gross, and a score,

>

>plus three times the square root of four,

>

>divided by seven,

>

>plus five times eleven,

>

>is nine squared and not a bit more."

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A 10, but imaginary

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The teacher begged, "Please, let's be rational here."

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Two scoops ice cream, one scoop human corpse, and half a liter of root beer.

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Because 7 ate 9.

Why did 7 eat 9?

Because you need 3 squared meals a day.

The police arrested 3 as well as 7, why?

Because 3 was the root of the problem.

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A solid 10, but also imaginary.

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Then 25.806975... is the root of all evil.

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... and the beast is pure evil wouldn't 25.8069758011278803 technically be the root of all evil?

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A mathematician walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a beer.

The bartender says, "Sorry but we've run out of beer. We have only root beer for today."

"No problem", replies the mathematician. "Just serve me in a square glass."

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(Saw this about 10 years ago)

If you have a girlfriend, then you know they cost time and money. Therefore:

Girls = time × money

But:

time = money

So:

Girls = money x money

Which means:

Girls = money^2

Now we all know that money is the root of all evil. So:

Money = sq.root(evil)

And now:

Girls = (sq.root (evil))^2

Which means:

Girls = Evil

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Because they always get root access.

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"Doctor, I have an ear ache."

2000 B.C. - "Here, eat this root."

1000 B.C. - "That root is heathen, say this prayer."

1850 A.D. - "That prayer is superstition, drink this potion."

1940 A.D. - "That potion is snake oil, swallow this pill."

1985 A.D. - "That pill is ineffective, take this antibiotic."

2017 A.D. - "That antibiotic is artificial. Here, eat this root!"

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Radical Islam.

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...but he didn't have root access.

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then 25.806975801127 is the root of all evil

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A perfect ten, but imaginary

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She's very real, but completely irrational.

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..for them for $500 a month for 36 months."

I said, "Wow, those sound like car payments."

"They are."

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But he has no money so he says to her "if I can give you the best orgasm of your life, will you give me a root free of charge?"

The hooker thinks for a moment and assumes that a midget of such small size surely couldn't give her an orgasm, so she agrees.

She lays down on the bed and the midget goes to work. Within minutes the hooker is crying in ecstasy, "OMFG you are amazing!"

The midget, surprised says, "really? They don't usually say that until I get the second leg in!"

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So the speed of light, *e*, and (-1)^1/2 walk into a bar. The speed of light heads over to the bartender and gets his drink pretty quickly, as he's wont to do. Then (-1)^1/2 goes and orders his drink, and *e* just flips out on him. The square root of -1 asks *e* what's wrong, and he says, "I came in here first, and you just went in front of me!" (-1)^1/2 just says, "Hey, man, I'm just following the rules here!"

Finally, the bartender gets fed up and says, "No, no, no, you idiot, it's *i* before *e* **except** after c!

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A blonde walks into the police department looking for a job. The officer wants to ask her a few questions....

Officer: What's 2+2?

Blonde: Ummmmm... 4!

Officer: What's the square root of 100?

Blonde: Ummmm... 10!

Officer: Good! Now, who killed Abraham Lincoln?

Blonde: Ummmm... I dunno.

Officer: Well, you can go home and think about it. Come back tomorrow.

The blonde goes home and calls up one of her friends, who asks her if she got the job. The blonde says, excitedly, "Not only did I get the job, I'm already working on a murder case!"

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Just Beer.

If you don't get it, think mathematically.

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It's just one of my irrational fears

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Square Root.

Anything it is applied to becomes radicalized.

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A dozen, a gross, and a score

Plus three times the square root of four

Divided by seven

Plus five times eleven

Is nine squared and not a bit more.

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**Patient:** "I have an ear ache."

**Doctor:**

2000 B.C. - "Eat this root."

1000 A.D. - "That root is heathen, say this prayer."

1750 A.D. - "That prayer is superstition, drink this potion."

1920 A.D. - "That potion is snake oil, swallow this pill."

1960 A.D. - "That pill is ineffective, take this antibiotic."

2010 A.D. - "That antibiotic is artificial, eat this root."

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Eight somethin'

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Did you ever wanted to stand out with a good sense of humour **joking with someone about Root**? Well, here are the best Root dad jokes to laugh out loud. Crazy funny puns and Root pick up lines to share with friends.