The Best 73 Rooster Jokes
Following is our collection of funniest Rooster jokes. There are some rooster coop jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud. Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these rooster bird puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.
Funny Rooster Jokes and Puns
A blonde calls her husband at work one day and asks him, "Can you help me when you get home?"
"Sure," he replies. "What's the problem?"
"Well, I started a really hard puzzle and I can't even find the edge pieces."
"Look on the box," he said. "There's always a picture of what the puzzle is."
"It's a big rooster," she said.
The husband arrives home and tells his blonde wife, "Okay, put the corn flakes back in the box."
Why did the rooster get 20 years in prison?
He got caught on the internet, looking up chicks.
Coloured Eggs
A rooster was strutting around the hen house one Easter morning and came across a nest of eggs dyed every color of the rainbow.
The rooster took one look at the colorful display, ran outside and beat the heck out of the resident peacock.
What came first, the chicken or the egg?
Neither, it was the selfish Rooster that came first and the Hen never even finished.
A farmer goes to the market to buy a rooster
He sees one he likes, so he asks the seller:"Is he any good for mating?"
"Oh, no problem there, he screwed every single chicken I had. He even tries to screw ducks, turkeys, even pigs!"
"Then why" asks the puzzled farmer "are you even selling him?"
"You see" answers the seller "lately he's been looking at me kinda funny."
What's the difference between a lawyer and an angry rooster?
The rooster clucks defiance. ^Let ^it ^sink ^in.
Legs in the Air
Little Johnny came home from school to see the family's pet rooster dead in the front yard. Rigor Mortis had set in and it was flat on its back with its legs in the air. When his Dad came home Johnny said, "Dad our rooster is dead and his legs are sticking in the air. Why are his legs sticking in the air?"
His father thinking quickly said, "Son, that's so God can reach down from the clouds and lift the rooster straight up to heaven."
"Gee Dad that's great," said Little Johnny. A few days later, when Dad came home from work, Johnny rushed out to meet him yelling, "Dad, Dad we almost lost Mom today!"
"What do you mean?" said Dad.
"Well Dad, I got home from school early today and went up to your bedroom and there was Mom flat on her back with her legs in the air screaming,"Jesus I'm coming, I'm coming" If it hadn't of been for Uncle George holding her down we'd have lost her for sure!"
Gave a homeless guy a dollar and got this joke...
What came first - the chicken, or the egg?
Neither. The rooster always comes first.
What do you call a coin featuring the image of a spaceship and a rooster?
Badmintin'
(P.s. I'm sorry, this is terrible)
A boy asks his father what a female chicken is called.
His dad answers "A hen, son."
"And a male chicken?" asks the boy. "They're called a rooster."
"How about a baby chicken?" to which his dad answers "A chick."
"So dad, what's a chicken?"
If a rooster lays an egg on a triangular roof, which side does it roll down?
Neither! Roosters don't lay eggs!
You can explore rooster pullet reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean rooster crow dad jokes. There are also rooster puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
It's Easter Sunday morning...
... and chubby Chuck has been chomping on Easter eggs all night. He decides that he simply can't eat one more Easter egg. So he plays a prank. He goes into the chicken coop and replaces every single egg the hens have laid with a brightly colored one. A few minutes later, the rooster walks in, sees all the colored eggs, then storms outside and kills the peacock.
Blonde woman calls her boyfriend....
"Sweetie, I'm doing this jigsaw puzzle and can't figure it out, would you come and help me?" she says.
Boyfriend comes over, and asks "What is the puzzle of?"
"A rooster", she replies miserably, gesturing towards the table, "But I can't even figure out where to start."
Boyfriend looks at the table, takes his girlfriend by the hand and says "OK, let's sit down and have a cup of tea, and then we can start putting the cornflakes back in the box."
What do you call a rooster from China?
Caucasian
Why doesn't a rooster wear underwear?
becuase his peckers on his head
How did the rooster get a lot of chicks?
A lot of good yolks!
The three different types of rooster
What does a rooster say?
Cock-a-doodle-doo
What does a crazy rooster say?
Doodle-doodle-cock
What does a Gay rooster say?
Any-cockle-do
What came first, the chicken or the egg?
The Rooster. ( อกยฐ อส อกยฐ)
How is a glory hole like a rooster crowing?
They're both a cock-a-dude'll-do.
What does a gay rooster say?
"Anycockledoooooo!"
What's the difference between a rooster and a nymphomaniac?
One says a-cock-a-doodle-do and the other says a-cock-or-two-will-do.
Why did the rooster buy mittens?
So his chicken fingers wouldn't get cold.
I'll leave now
What do you call a story about a rooster?
A cocktale.
Two roosters go to a strip club...
... The first says to the second: "Are you a leg or a breast man?"
This year's the year of the rooster, so I ate chicken.
Next year's the year of the dog.
What came first, the hen or the egg?
The rooster. ;)
All Chinese born this year are white...
...because being born in the year of the Rooster makes them cock-Asians.
What do you get when you come across a Rooster, a poodle, and a ghost?
Cock-a-Poodle-Boo!!!
The Easter massacre
After the egg hunt on Easter Sunday, the young farm boy decided to play a prank. He went to the chicken coop and replaced every single egg with a brightly colored one. A few minutes later the rooster walked in saw all the colored eggs, then stormed outside and killed the peacock
Roosters have the right idea.
They wake up screaming.
Why did the Hen make her Rooster cross the road?
Because he was using fowl language.
What time is it when your fighting rooster wins its first match?
1-0'cock
What did the gay rooster say?
Any cock'll do.
I'm pretty sure I was a rooster in my past life...
Cause any Cock-or-Dude-ill-dooooooo!
What do you call an overconfident rooster?
**Cocky**
Thank you I will unfortunately be here all week.
Why did the gay rooster cross the road?
COOOOOOOOOOOOCK
What do you call a rooster drawing a doodle?
Cock-a-doodle-do!
What do you get when you cross a rooster and a turkey?
A cockgobbler.
My roommate told me a rooster pecked him in the eye when he was a kid...
I always thought he looked a little cockeyed.
Hey girl, are you looking for a stud?
I've got the STD, all I need is U.
Credit goes to Rooster from the Netflix series *The Ranch*
What does a rooster say?
Cock-a-doodle-do
What does a dyslexic rooster say?
Doodle-doodle-cock
What does a gay rooster say?
.
.
.
.
.
.
Any-cockle-do
My grandpa told me this one today
There was a boy who lived on a farm. He decided that he wanted to pull an Easter prank. So the next morning he went into the hen house and swapped out all the eggs for colorful Easter eggs. When the rooster came in he took one look at the eggs and then immediate ran and killed the peacock.
Not the best joke but it made me chuckle
What do you get if you cross a cocker-spaniel with a poodle and a rooster?
A Cockerpoodledoo!
I dressed up like a giant rooster and scared my wife.
Apparently she doesn't like boo cocky.
I was sick of my alarm clock so I bought a rooster...
But now I'm starting to think I got a gay rooster. Instead of saying "cock-a-doodle-doo" in the morning, he says "any-cockle-doo"
Did you hear about the fighting rooster who never lost a fight?
His record was impeccable.
What would be the offspring of a vixen and a rooster?
A foxy chick.
What does an angry narcissist and a rooster have in common?
When a rooster crows, their hearing closes off so they don't damage their hearing. The narcissist does the same when yelling.
From my 8 year old daughter. How do you make a rooster fly?
Chicken wings
What does a sick rooster say?
Cock-a-doodle-choo!!!
How did the rooster meet the hen?
Chicken tinder....
A farmer trained his rooster to peel the husks off of corn
What a cock-shucker
What's the difference between a rooster and a nymphomaniac?
The rooster crows : **"Cock-a-doodle-doo"**
The nymphomaniac goes :**"Any-Cock-will-dooo"**
What do you call a rooster staring at a pile of lettuce?
A chicken sees a salad.
Which came first, the chicken or the egg?
It was actually the rooster.
After all exhaustive, unsuccessful search for a mate, what did the gay rooster say?
"At this point, any cock'll doodle do."
What do you call a rooster who's abusive to his kids?
An egg beater
Why did the rooster cross the road?
He heard there were some pretty hot chicks at KFC.
On my way to climb Mt. Everest, I came upon a local villager who said he had a rooster that laid eggs.
"How is that possible?" I asked.
"Himalayan rooster," he replied.
Which came first; the chicken or the egg?
Trick question! It was the rooster.
What came first, the chicken or the egg?
A: The Rooster
Which came first, the chicken or the egg
Well since there is an egg, the rooster did
A Rooster With No Feathers on His Rump Walks into a Bar.....
Bartender: Can I help you?
Bird: I understand you have cocktails
What did the contrarian rooster say?
Cockle-Doodle-Don't.
What did the the desperate gay rooster say?
Any-cock'll do!
A woman bought a rooster, wanting to hear it crow.
However, it turns out the rooster was mute, so she was out of cluck.
I once went to climb Mount Everest...
... came across a local village farmer who said he had a rooster that could lay eggs.
I said, How is that possible?
He said, Himalayan Rooster
P.S I told that joke to a farm girl today and to all the other ag folk who clapped it made my day. Even if there's only two of you with enough cell service to have read it and laughed.
Why are firetrucks red?
Why are firetrucks red?
Well because firetrucks have six wheels, six is half a dozen. Usually when someone is using half a dozen and a dozen, they are referring to eggs. Eggs come from chickens, a male chicken is a rooster, roosters are often on steeples, steeples are are tall, like a mast on a ship, ships go on the sea, in the sea there are fish and fish have fins and the Fins fought the Soviets and the soviet flag is red.
TIL there is a rooster that lays eggs.
The breed is Himalayan.
How many roosters does it take to fertilize an egg?
A cock-er-two'll-do!
Just heard this for the first time. And while on acid I laughed for two hours at this joke so I had to post it here
What came first, the chicken or the egg?
Neither, it was the rooster.
Why did the rooster hide the menu from his wife?
He was looking at Chicken breast.
President Calvin Coolidge and his wife were being shown separately around an experimental farm
When Mrs. Coolidge came to the chicken yard she noticed that a rooster was mating very frequently. She asked the attendant how often that happened and was told, "Dozens of times each day."
Mrs. Coolidge said, "Tell that to the President when he comes by."
When the President came by the henhouse, the guide dutifully told him what his wife had said.
"Same hen every time?" the President asked.
"Oh, no, Mr. President, a different hen every time."
The President nodded his head. "Tell that to Mrs. Coolidge."
Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the rooster doodle jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.
We suggest to use only working rooster horny rooster piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.