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Rolling Pin Jokes

12 rolling pin jokes and hilarious rolling pin puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about rolling pin that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Funniest Rolling Pin Short Jokes

Short rolling pin jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The rolling pin humour may include short bowling pin jokes also.

  1. I ask my wife the same thing everytime I knock down 10 pins in one roll at a bowling alley. "How's that strike ya?"
  2. Got home from the pub at 3'o clock this morning.
    The wife was waiting at the door with a rolling pin.
    I said to her, "what are you doing..baking..at this time of the night" ?
  3. So a guy s**... lays on top n' stuff on many rolling pins and does a good job. He's on a roll!

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Rolling Pin One Liners

Which rolling pin one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with rolling pin? I can suggest the ones about steamroller and steam roller.

  1. If people had to pay rolling pins, They'd be rollin' in the dough.

Rolling Pin Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.

What funny jokes about rolling pin you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean bowling pins jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make rolling pin pranks.

A wife his her husband with a rolling pin

A wife hits her Husband with a rolling pin, the husband says ouch! What was that for?
The wife then tells him I found a piece of paper with the name Jenny on it
The husband then tells her that Jenny was the name of the horse he put a bet on last week.
The wife apologises to him.
The next the wife hits her husband with a rolling pin.
The husband says ouch! What was that for?
The wife then says your horse is on the phone

A group of men are out sailing when they decide to see what the chef is cooking for dinner.

They walk in and, being that he doesn't have a rolling pin, see him flattening biscuits with his armpit.
That's disgusting! o**... says to the other.
Yeah, well you should see how he makes donuts!

Saul, the Jewish Lottery Winner

So Saul, a 90-year-old Jew, wins the $300 million lottery. He's at the news conference to accept the check, and the reporters ask him if there's anyone he'd like to thank.
"Yes," he says solemnly. "I'd like to thank my brother Eli for lending me the $5 to buy the ticket, and my brother David for driving me to the Circle-K to buy the ticket.
"Lastly, I'd like to thank Adolph h**...."
The silence was sudden and complete; you could hear a pin drop.
Finally a reporter raises a shaky hand and asks, "D-did you j-just say you w-wanted to thank H-h**...?"
"Yes, of course," Saul replies.
"Whatever for?"
Rolling his sleeve up, Saul points to the inside of his forearm. "For the NUMBERS!"

3 men are riding in an airplane over their city

3 guys were in a Cessna Airplane flying over the city they lived in. The first man said "I love my city so much, I'm gonna drop this 50 cent coin out the window for someone to find. That will make their day!" So he threw it out.
The second man pulled out a roll of coins and said "I love my city so much that I'll throw this whole roll of coins out the window! And he threw it out.
The third man hated his city, so he pulled out an incendiary grenade and said "I hate my city so much I'm dropping this out the window!" So he pulled the pin and pitched it.
Later that day, the third man was walking through the streets when he saw a little girl crying, so he asked her what was wrong. She said "both my dad and grandpa were hit by coins that fell out of the sky! Now my dads in the hospital with a coma and my grandpa got startled and had a heart attack!"
After the man consoled the little girl, he kept walking until he saw a boy rolling around laughing on the sidewalk in front of a pile of charred wood. When the man asked him what was so funny, the kid said
"I f**... and my house burst into flames!"

skipping church

Father Norton woke up Sunday morning and realizing it was an exceptionally
beautiful and sunny early spring day, decided he just had to play golf. So... he
told the Associate Pastor that he was feeling sick and persuaded him to say Mass
for him that day.
As soon as the Associate Pastor left the room, Father Norton headed out of town
to a golf course about forty miles away. This way he knew he wouldn't
accidentally meet anyone he knew from his parish. Setting up on the first tee,
he was alone. After all, it was Sunday morning and everyone else was in church!
At about this time, Saint Peter leaned over to the Lord while looking down from
the heavens and exclaimed "You're not going to let him get away with this, are
you?"
The Lord sighed, and said, "No, I guess not."
Just then Father Norton hit the ball and it shot straight towards the pin,
dropping just short of it, rolled up and fell into the hole.
IT WAS A 420 YARD HOLE IN ONE!
St. Peter was astonished. He looked at the Lord and asked, "Why did you let him do that?" The Lord smiled and replied, "Who's he going to tell?"

Oasis

3 men are lost in the desert and dieing of dehydration. In the distance they see a small house with trees and gardens. As they near a morbidly obese woman approaches. They beg her for help. She looks at them and says,
"I will give you each something to eat or drink but first you must have s**... with me." The men look at her and are all disgusted by the rolls of fat, hair all over her body and skin lesions. They then look at each other and know what they have to do. One of them says,
"I'll go first." As he follows her into the hut he sees an ear of corn on the table. He grabs it and uses it to p**... her. After a few minutes he walks out with a glass of icy water and a large smile on his face. The other men look at each other and shrug their shoulders and the second volunteers. He follows the woman into the hut and sees a rolling pin. He uses that to p**... her. A few minutes later he walks out with a smile on his face and a large glass of milk.
Confused the third man walks into the hut and to his delight sees a cucumber to p**... her with.
Over an hour passes and the 2 men outside the hut are confused about what is taking so long. Finally the other man walks outside with nothing in his hands but a huge smile on his face. The first man asks,
"What are you smiling about?" which he replies,
"She made me a p**... of cream of corn soup."

One night, Murphy was walking home when, all of a sudden, a thief jumped on him.


Murphy and the thief began to wrestle.
They rolled about on the ground and Murphy put up a tremendous fight.
However, the thief managed to get the better of him and pinned him to the ground.
The thief then went through Murphy’s pockets and searched him. All the thief could find on Murphy was 25 cents.
The thief was so surprised at this that he asked Murphy why he had bothered to fight so hard for 25 cents.
"Was that all you wanted?" Murphy replied, "I thought you were after the five hundred dollars I’ve got in me shoe!"