Rodney Dangerfield Jokes

Funniest Rodney Dangerfield Short Jokes

Short rodney dangerfield jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The rodney dangerfield humour may include short rodney wife jokes also.

1. My doctor he dont help either, he told me to run 5 Miles a Day for two weeks I called him up I said "Doc im 70 miles from my house"
   -Rodney Dangerfield
2. I asked my wife if shed like me to be in the room with her when she delivered our child She said "Why? It's not like you were in the room when she was concieved.
   RIP Rodney Dangerfield
3. My psychiatrist told me I was crazy and I told him I wanted another opinion.. He said fine, you're ugly too
   -Rodney Dangerfield
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4. I come from a small town. I come from a town where the population never changes. Everytime a kid is born, some guy leaves town.
5. I Don't Get No Respect I went into a bar and asked for a double. The bartender went into the back and came out with a guy who looked like me.
   -Rodney Dangerfield
6. bad day today I put on my shirt, a button fell off. I picked up my briefcase, the handle fell off. I'm afraid to go to the bathroom!!
   Credit Rodney Dangerfield
7. My girlfriend called me up. She said, "Come over there's nobody home... I went over. There was nobody home.
8. Is there someone else? I was making love with my wife, and she had a faraway look in her eyes.
   I said, 'Darling, is there someone else?' and she said, 'There must be.' 
9. My childhood was tough. I'm so ugly, that when I was a baby my mother refused to breastfeed me.
   She told me she just liked me as a friend.
10. Well I finally solved my drinking problem, I joined Alcoholics Anonymous Yeah I still drink, I just use a different name, that's all

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Rodney Dangerfield One Liners

Which rodney dangerfield one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with rodney dangerfield? I can suggest the ones about robin williams and jerry seinfeld.

1. My wife has to be the worst cook ever. In my house we pray after we eat.
2. My parents moved a lot when I was a kid But I always found them. - Rodney Dangerfield
3. When I was born I was so ugly... the doctor slapped my mother.
4. I Was So Poor in my neighborhood the rainbow was in black and white!
5. I went window shopping yesterday with my wife.... We bought three windows.
6. My wife is such a bad cook, the flies chipped in to fix the screens.
7. You ever hear about that time Rodney Dangerfield played World of Warcraft No respec
8. What do Rodney Dangerfield and Aretha Franklin have in common? They're both dead
9. My wife likes to talk after s**..... So she called me from a hotel room.
10. I only get laid because of who I am... A r**...!

Rodney Dangerfield No Respect Jokes

Here is a list of funny rodney dangerfield no respect jokes and even better rodney dangerfield no respect puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• What do you get when you are the daughter of Rodney Dangerfield and Aretha Franklin? No R-E-S-P-E-C-T.
• I don't get no respect. I was an ugly kid. I was so ugly when I was born the doctor slapped my mother.

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What funny jokes about rodney dangerfield you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean ray charles jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make rodney dangerfield pranks.