Rock And Roll Jokes
72 rock and roll jokes and hilarious rock and roll puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about rock and roll that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Rock And Roll Short Jokes
Short rock and roll jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The rock and roll humour may include short rock roll jokes also.
- Rock, paper and scissors have entered a race. Rock has begun to roll, but paper and scissors remain stationery.
- I'm in a band. We do covers of Stone Sour, Stone Temple Pilots, and The Rolling Stones. We're a rock band.
- The Rock and Roll Hierarchy has fallen The King has left the building, Queen has bit the dust, and now the doves cry for their Prince.
- I spend the mornings in my rocking chair, and in the afternoon I go out in my wheelchair. I've got a real rock 'n' roll lifestyle.
- I wish my parents ran when they heard The Rolling Stones. Now they're stuck under a pile of rocks.
- I don't go on and on about how I can't roller skate But apparently the whole world needs to know about how this w**... in the river can't swim.
- Brazil have started playing 'Rock & Roll football' They play with a rock solid defence, midfield and attack, and have Neymar rolling around on the ground.
- What does Indiana Jones drink to reinforce his courage? A snakebite shot chased by a rolling rock.
- Why is the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame induction ceremony in New York City, when the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame is located in Cleveland? Because the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame is located in Cleveland
- Let's say you use recycled Van Halen CDs as part of the infrastructure of a large town... ...does that mean you built the city on rock and roll?
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Rock And Roll One Liners
Which rock and roll one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with rock and roll? I can suggest the ones about rock music and classic rock.
- What's Indiana Jones's least favorite beer? Rolling Rock
- What beer do you drink on Easter Sunday? Rolling Rock
- What was Sisyphus's favourite type of music? Rock 'n' Roll
- What beer does Sisyphus hate the most? Rolling Rock.
- What do you call a man falling down the stairs with a hard on? Rock and roll
- What do you call a cat that's been listening to too much rock and roll? Def Leppard.
- Did you hear about Dwayne Johnson and the cinnamon bun? They say it's rock and roll.
- Have you heard of the nuttiest band in rock n roll? The almond brothers...
I'll go now - What kind of music does a boulder like? Rock and roll.
Cr - How does Dwayne Johnson sign up for a music contest? Rock enrolls
\[Rock 'n' rolls\] - What does a rolling stone grow into ? A punk rock
- How do you bid farewell to your pet rock? You let it roll.
- I hear Sisyphus was a musical genius The original master of rock and roll!
- What do rock stars do when their clothes catch fire? They stop, rock and roll
- What is the preferred rock and roll band in Greece ? Megadebt !
Experience Instant Grins & Giggles with Playful Rock And Roll Jokes
What funny jokes about rock and roll you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean rock star jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make rock and roll pranks.
A man goes to the confessional.
"Forgive me father, for I have sinned."
"What is your sin, my child?" The priest asks back.
"Well," the man starts, "I used some horrible language this week and feel absolutely terrible."
"When did you do use this awful language?" said the priest.
"I was golfing and hit an incredible drive that looked like it was going to go over 250 yards, but it struck a phone line that was hanging over the fairway and fell straight down to the ground after going only about 100 yards."
"Is that when you swore?"
"No, Father." Said the man.
"After that, a squirrel ran out of the bushes and grabbed my ball in his mouth and began to run away."
Is THAT when you swore?" asked the Father again.
"Well, no." said the man, "You see, as the squirrel was running, an eagle came down out of the sky, grabbed the squirrel in his talons and began to fly away!"
"Is THAT when you swore?" asked the amazed Priest.
"No, not yet." The man replied. "As the eagle carried the squirrel away in his claws, it flew towards the green. And as it passed over a bit of forest near the green, the squirrel dropped my ball."
"Did you swear THEN?" asked the now impatient Priest.
"No, because as the ball fell it struck a tree, bounced through some bushes, careened off a big rock, and rolled through a sand trap onto the green and stopped within six inches of the hole."
"You missed the f**king putt, didn't you?" sighed the Priest.
What sound does a cow rolling a rock up a hill make?
CAMOO
What is a rock's favorite band?
The Rolling Stones.
How does it feel to be a famous rock-and-roll musician?
Fan-f**...-tastic!
I've found a new genre of music. It's a combination of heavy rock n' roll, hip hop, and folk music.
I call it Scrap Metal.
Rock'n'Roll Heaven
Stevie Ray Vaughan dies in his helicopter c**... and goes to heaven. He is escorted by Saint Peter to a special area reserved for famous dead rock musicians. He is very honoured as he sees that he is in the company of Elvis, Jimi Hendrix, Janis Joplin, John Lennon, Buddy Holly and dozens of other famous faces from the history of rock.
Then he spies Bono preening in front of a mirror.
"Hey wait a second," he says, "Bono's not dead!"
Saint Peter replies, "Actually, that's God. He just thinks he's Bono"
I was at a rock and roll concert...
...and the lead singer came up and said: "how many of you feel human being tonight?"
Then he said: "how many of you feel like animals?"
And everyone cheered after the animals part.
But I cheered after the human beings part because I did not know there was a second part to the question. - Mitch Hedberg
did you hear about the rock and roll fishmonger?
they sell skate, mackerel and roe.
What did the stone say to the hill?
Let's Rock and Roll.
What is Jesus's favorite beer?
Rolling Rock.
A frog walks into a bank...
...and proceeds to ask the Asian teller, Ms. Patricia Wok, for a $5,000 loan. Absolutely gobsmacked at a talking frog she mechanically goes through the procedure, asking him if he has any references. As a matter of fact, he replies, my dad's m**... Jagger, he's a musician. Okay, she says hesitantly. I mean if a talking frog, what's not allowed? Do you have any collateral, she continues. Yeah, he says, this ruby, while pulling a crimson rock from his overalls. Composing herself she decides to ask the bank manager for assistance. Quickly bringing him up to speed, she says, can we continue with the transaction and is the ruby even real? At which point the bank manager examines the gemstone, sizes up the situation and says, it's just a nicknack Patty Wok but give the frog a loan, his old man is a rolling stone.
I'm no troll
I know how how to rock and ROLL!
What does a rock and a person on fire have in common?
They both rock and roll.
How did Jim Morrison get into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame?
The Doors
I lead a pretty rock n roll lifestyle
I wake up s**... and roll out of bed
If we were making our joints with rocks instead of w**....
We would be Rolling Stones.
The Rolling Stones are so old.....
that nowadays only their chairs are rocking.
Well the war was finally over, and...
A train full of soldiers was headed back from the front. In one carriage, a Colonel and a Corporal sat across from each other, and as the train rolled past a former battlefield, the Colonel sighed and told the Corporal that he'd once led a charge riding a great white stallion in that very spot...at least until the cowardly enemy shot the horse from under him and he had to go on by foot. Time passed and the train rolled on. Eventually the Corporal gestured out the window, saying, "Sir, if you look out you can see a large rock, and one time I made love to a farm girl there...at least until the cowardly enemy shot her out from under me and I had to go on by hand."
Do you remember the good times? We have Game-boy, Rock N' Roll, Discoteque....
Bitcoins...
Where did the king of rock and roll die?
On the porcelain throne.
This is a joke i made up when i was 4 years old
Why did the dinosaur fall in the paint?
Because it was listening to rock and roll music.
A man walks into a bar and asks for a surprise. The bartender pulls out some ice and a roll of tape.
The man asks: what are you making?
The bartender replies: Scotch on the rocks, bud
What kind of music listen gay people in the middle east to?
Rock and roll!
Jon Bon Jovi was inducted into the Rock hall of fame
I asked him, "aren't you disappointed and ashamed you aren't in the more prestigious Rock & ***Roll*** hall of fame?"
He said "Woah, we're halfway there".
Why where the cave people mad about their children playing with rocks all the time.
They wouldn't stop getting s**..., staring at tablets, and playing rock and roll all day.
Every Friday Mrs. Jones ask the class a question.
The kid that answers correctly gets to leave class early.
Timmy has never been that kid. But this Friday he decided it was his turn. Friday comes around and Timmy is ready. The class sits down and is listening for the question. Timmy pulls some marbles out and rolls them across the floor. The teacher turns around and says to the class.
"Alright kids, who's the comedian with the black b**...?"
Timmy yells, "Chris Rock, See ya Monday Teach!"
Your typical rock band
In my history of Rock and Roll class, chapter 13 focused on the early rock artists post punk era. At the very beginning of the chapter the band King Crimson is briefly mentioned, they seemed to have qualities that later artist would adopt and were quite popular, with songs such as 21 century schizoid boy, I talk to the wind, and In the court of King Crimson (my favorite by the band). However they didn't blow up as much as later rock artists such as Jimi Hendrix, Eric Clapton, and AC/DC. They're more so seen as a footnote of that era because of this. I suppose King Crimson was ahead of their time in that regards, but only by like 10 seconds.
My 7 year old just came up with these Avatar: The Last Airbender jokes. We were quite surprised.
What kind of music does Toph like?
- Rock-and-Roll
What kind of instrument does Aang play?
- Air guitar
I know it's not much, but I got a kick out of his reasoning and decided to share.
A guy walks into a liquor store and ask for a case of Heineken.
The gal behind the counter replies, "Sorry. We're out of Heineken."
The guy shrugs his shoulders and says, "Fine. Make it Rolling Rock."
The woman replies, "Sorry, but the only cold beer we have in stock is Budweiser."
The man says, "Nope. No way. Last time I drank a case of Bud, I ended up getting sick and blowing chunks."
The cashier replies, "You drink a case of any beer you're gonna get sick!"
The man retorts, "No, you don't understand. My dog's name is Chunks."
A Native American goes to court
and says: - "I want to change my name"
the clerk asks him: "What is your name?"
\-"The big round rock that rolled down the hill and fell into the creek"
\-"And what will your new name be?"
\-"Splash"
Classic Rock and Roll Trivia
I learned today that 3 of the guys who performed on "Rosanna" and "Africa" also played on "Dust in the Wind". Music journalist asked them why they joined the new band and they said
"Toto? We aren't in Kansas anymore".
A golfer is playing a par 4 hole.
His first shot is right down the middle, but the second shot lands in a sand trap. He swings hard. The ball clears the trap but hooks badly. A famous rock group is walking by. The ball ricochets off the side of the head of m**... Jagger, killing him instantly. It bounces off the head of Keith Richards, killing him too, but then lands on the green and rolls into the cup.
Yep, you got it, he killed two Stones with one birdie.
