Roasted Jokes

What are some Roasted jokes?

why dont jewish people like getting made fun of?

Because millions of them already got roasted

I like my women like i like my coffee...

...Always there to brighten my morning


...Black and strong




...With sauce

...Twice before I leave the house

...Right before I smoke

...Bitter and cold

...At the end of the day, scraped off the bottom of a pot

...Slow roasted

...Ground up in my freezer

...With boiling water poured over them

...Light and sweet

...A day old

My Nephew's pet chicken died.

I couldn't help asking if the funeral will be fried or roasted.

A Cannibal Joke

Two cannibals meet one day. The first cannibal says, You know, I just can't seem to get a tender missionary, I've baked them, I have roasted them, I've stewed them, I've barbecued them, I've tried every sort of marinade. I just can't seem to get them tender.

The second cannibal asks, What kind of missionary do you use?

The other replies, You know, the ones that hang out at the place at the bend of the lake. They have those brown cloaks with a funny ring of hair on their heads.

Aha! the second cannibal replies. No wonder ā€“ those are friars!

Poaching defenseless, innocent wild animals is just plain wrong

They're much better roasted.

Why can't Vin Diesel differentiate Thanksgiving Turkey from his best friend?

Because they're both roasted

A couple went out to eat ...

A couple went out to eat at a nice restaurant. The waiter came over to give them the specials of the night, "For our main courses, we have a nice roasted Salmon with a Cranberry-Mustard sauce or a tender Chicken fried steak." The lady replied that she'd have the salmon.

The waiter said, "Very good, madam. What about the vegetable?"

She said, "Oh, I'm sure he'll just order the Chicken Fried Steak."

A man is sitting on a barstool...

and eating from a bowl of peanuts. But instead of just eating them, he takes one peanut at a time, mutters "You suck!", and then crams it into his mouth. He continues to do this for a while.

Finally, the woman next to him can't contain her curiosity. "Why are you saying that?" she asks.

"I like them roasted."

Why can't you insult Jewish people?

Because they've already been roasted.

I ordered a steak prepared Ć  la Robert Kraft at a steakhouse outside Gilette Stadium.

It was well-aged meat, massaged with an Asian rub, publicly grilled and roasted.

My nephew was driving me crazy with his juvenile comebacks to everything I said, so I pushed him into the campfire.


Chinese restaurant

A man goes to a restaurant and without letting the waitress give him the menu says "I want a Medium Rare Ribeye steak with Roasted Potatoes in Marinara sauce." The waitress timidly responds "Sir. This is a Chinese restaurant." To which the man replies "Oh! I'm sorry. I want a Medium Lale Libeye steak with Loasted Potatoes in Malinala Sauce."

Did you hear about the nut down the street whose house was burned down?

He was a salted, but his honey roasted.

Elon Musk just sent some roasted cows on to the moon.

The steaks have never been higher.

I was outside in my garden when a guy walked to me and started insulting me, so I roasted him in front of everyone.

He tasted really good with fries.

Andy Cornell called, they said you suck!

And you're gayer than Oscar.

Boom, Roasted.

What do people being roasted and condoms being manufactured have in common?

Both are getting ribbed for your pleasure.

How did the marshmallow feel when he heard that his brother had been roasted alive and crushed between two biscuits?

He was S'moretified

Why was the man upset?

A man spends the whole day fishing but comes back home holding a duck. When he opens the door he says this is the pig I've been telling you about all day. Wife says, but that's a duck. The man says I wasn't talking to you.

Now the man is upset, because he can't eat the duck anymore after he just roasted his pig. But then after dinner the man gets even more upset, but not because his dinner tasted like fish, but because it was the worst fish he had all day!

What do you call a mental hospital on fire?

Roasted Nuts

What did the turkey say before it was roasted?

Boy! Iā€™m stuffed!

How to make Roasted jokes?

We have collected gags and puns about Roasted to have fun with. Do you want to stand out in a crowd with a good sense of humour joking about Roasted? If Yes here are a lot more hilarious lines and funny Roasted pick up lines to share with friends.

Joko Jokes