ricky gervais Jokes

funny jokes and hilarious ricky gervais puns

Why is Ricky Gervais uncircumcised?

Because's there's no end to that prick.

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Ricky Gervais Tim Allen joke.

“What can I say about our next two presenters?” Ricky Gervais asked.

“The first is an actor, producer and director whose movies have grossed over $3.5bn at the box office. He’s won two Academy Awards and three Golden Globes for his powerful and varied performances, starring in such films as Philadelphia, Forrest Gump, Castaway, Apollo 13 and Saving Private Ryan. The other... is Tim Allen.”

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Ricky Gervais has sold the rights to do an 'adult' adaptation of 'The Office' to Vivid Picture.

It will be called 'The Orifice'.

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I came here in a limo tonight, and the license plate was made by Felicity Huffman.

It’s her daughter I feel sorry for. That must be the most embarrassing thing that’s ever happened to her, and her dad was in Wild Hogs.

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Nobody cares about movies anymore.

No one goes to the cinema, no one really watches network TV. Everyone’s watching Netflix. This show should just be me coming out going “Well done, Netflix. You win—everything.” But no, we’ve got to drag it out for three hours. You could binge watch the entire first season of After Life instead of watching this show. That’s a show about a man who wants to kill himself because his wife dies of cancer, and it’s still more fun than this. Spoiler alert: Season 2 is on the way, so in the end, he obviously didn’t kill himself. Just like Jeffrey Epstein.

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Ricky Gervais on the new Godzilla movie...

Goddoesnotexistzilla

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Martin Scorsese, the greatest living director, made the news for his comments about Marvel movies.

He said they’re not real cinema and they remind him of theme parks. I agree, although I don’t know what he’s doing hanging around theme parks. He’s not big enough to go on the rides.

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All the best actors have jumped to Netflix and HBO.

And the actors who just do Hollywood movies do fantasy adventure nonsense. They wear masks and capes, and really tight costumes. Their job isn’t acting anymore. It’s going to the gym twice a day and taking steroids. Have we got an award for most ripped junkie?

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The Irishman was amazing.

Long, but amazing. It wasn’t the only epic movie. Once Upon a Time in Hollywood, nearly three hours long. Leonardo DiCaprio attended the premiere, and by the end, his date was too old for him. Even Prince Andrew’s like, “Come on, Leo, mate. You’re nearly 50, son.”

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This is the last time I’m hosting these awards.

I don’t care anymore. I’m joking: I never did. NBC clearly don’t care either. Kevin Hart was fired from the Oscars because of some offensive tweets. Lucky for me, the Hollywood Foreign Press can barely speak English, and they’ve no idea what Twitter is. I got offered this gig by fax.

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So if you do win an award tonight don’t use it as a platform to make a political speech.

You’re in no position to lecture the public, about anything. You know nothing about the real world. Most of you spent less time in school than Greta Thunberg. So, if you win, come up, accept your little award, thank your agent and your god, and fuck off.

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Apple roared into the TV game with The Morning Show, a super drama about the importance of dignity and doing the right thing, made by a company that runs sweatshops in China. You say you’re woke, but the companies you work for, it’s unbelievable—Apple, Amazon, Disney. If ISIS started a streaming service, you’d call your agent.

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How do you make a gay guy have sex with a woman?

Simple. You shit in her cunt.

-Ricky Gervais

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The world got to see James Corden as a fat pussy.

He was also in the movie Cats.

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Lots of famous people here tonight.

I mean, legends, iconic. This table alone. Al Pacino, Robert De Niro. Baby Yoda—oh, that’s Joe Pesci, sorry.

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It was a big year for pedophile movies.

Surviving R Kelly. Leaving Neverland. The Two Popes.

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What are the best Ricky Gervais puns and pranks?

Did you ever wanted to prank someone about Ricky Gervais? Well, here are the best jokes about Ricky Gervais to have fun with.

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