Ribbon Jokes
40 ribbon jokes and hilarious ribbon puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about ribbon that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Are you in the mood for a laugh? Get ready to cut the ribbon on some of the funniest ribbon jokes around! From Pabst Blue Ribbon to Red Ribbon, Streamer, Necktie, and Wreath, these jokes are sure to entertain.
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Funniest Ribbon Short Jokes
Short ribbon jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The ribbon humour may include short ring jokes also.
- My dad said people shouldn't get ribbons just for participating because it rewards them for losing. So I took down his confederate flag.
- What do you call Batman and Robin after they've been run over by a steamroller? Flatman and Ribbon!
My father told me this joke the same day he taught me how to whistle.
R.I.P. Dad - Breast cancer awareness has pink ribbons, but what does alcoholism awareness have? Bruises.
- What do you call Batman and Robin after they got run over by a steamroller? Flatman and Ribbon
- In honor of the Bowling Green Massacre, wear a green ribbon . . . . . . or, perhaps more appropriately, some color you made up in your head.
- Someone sent the Buddha a gift box tied with a ribbon. Buddha opened it to find it empty. Aha! , he said, Just what I wanted. Nothing!
- What happened to Batman and Robin when a herd of elephants trampled over them ? They became Flatman and Ribbon...
- What happened to Batman and Robin when they got run over by a steamroller? They became Flatman and Ribbon.
- What do you call Batman and... What do you call Batman and Robin after the Joker ran them over with a steamroller?
Flatman and Ribbon!!!
--Apparently this was my 5yo self's fav joke. - What do you call an outlaw who steals gift wrapping from the rich to give to the poor? Ribbon Hood.
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Ribbon One Liners
Which ribbon one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with ribbon? I can suggest the ones about cord and wrapper.
- What do you call The Dynamic Duo after they got hit by a steamroller? Flatman and Ribbon
- What do you get when a herd of elephants tramples Batman and Robin? Flatman and Ribbon.
- What do you get when an Elephant runs over Batman and Robin? Flatman and Ribbon.
- I like people who have ink ribbon. They're just my type.
- What do you get after an Elephant runs over Batman and Robin????????? Flatman and Ribbon.
- What do you call a superhero-duo run over by a steam roller? Flatman and Ribbon.
- How is a nurse like a ribbon cutter? One ropes the cuts, the other cuts the ropes.
- If I had a Pabst Blue Ribbon, and cream cheese would i have a Pabst schmear?
- As a millennial snowflake, if I can't win, I at least expect a ribbon for precipitation.
- What's dad's favorite beer? Pap's Blue Ribbon.
- I don't understand why Pabst gets such a bad wrap. It won a blue ribbon Once.
- Wondering why Google has a black ribbon today... I think I forgot something.
- What's a chronically m**... hipster's favorite beer? Fapst blue ribbon.
Pabst Blue Ribbon Jokes
Here is a list of funny pabst blue ribbon jokes and even better pabst blue ribbon puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Sometimes it gets so hot outside that I like to rub a cold can of Pabst Blue Ribbon across myself to cool down... I call it a Pabst Smear.
Ribbon Cutting Jokes
Here is a list of funny ribbon cutting jokes and even better ribbon cutting puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Whatvdid the inaugural ribbon say before the opening of the new hotel? "Cut my life into pieces, this is my last resort"
Laughable Ribbon Jokes for Instant Grins & Giggles
What funny jokes about ribbon you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean sheet jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make ribbon pranks.
Walking home after a girls' night out, two women pass a graveyard and stop to pee...
The first woman has nothing to wipe with, so she uses her underwear and tosses it.
Her friend, however, finds a ribbon on a wreath, so she uses that.
The next day, the first woman's husband phones the second woman's husband, furious: "My wife came home last night without her p**...!"
"That's nothing," says the other. "Mine came back with a card stuck between her b**... cheeks that said, 'From all of us at the fire station, we'll never forget you.'"
Two tipsy women sneak into a graveyard to pee one night.
Once done, one uses her p**... to wipe with and throws them away, the other uses a ribbon from a nearby wreath.
The next day one husband called the other: "My wife came home last night without any p**...!"
"That's nothing!" The other replied, "My wife had a card stuck between her b**... cheeks that said, 'From all of us at the fire station, we'll never forget you.'"
Walking home after a girls' night out, two rather drunk women pass a graveyard and stop to pee.
The first woman has nothing to wipe with, so she uses her underwear and tosses it. Her friend, however, finds a ribbon on a wreath, so she uses that.
The next day, the first woman's husband phones the second woman's husband, furious: "My wife came home last night without her p**...!"
"That's nothing," says the other. "Mine came back with a card stuck between her b**... cheeks that said, 'From all of us at the fire station, we'll never forget you.'"
A pig that can speak French
A circus advertises a new act: a pig that can speak French. A trainer walks onto the stage carrying a small pig with a blue ribbon and a wooden mallet. The trainer asks, "Parlez-vous français?" and hits the pig with the mallet. The pig: "Ouiiii..."
For his 70th birthday, one of his students gave the zen master a big box with a ribbon around it.
When the master opened the box, he found that there was nothing inside.
"Aha," he exclaimed, "just what I wanted!"
Cocktail
A guy walks into a bar, sits down, and asks, "bartender, got any specials today?" Bartender answers, "yes, as a matter of fact we have a new drink invented by a gynecologist patron of ours. It's a mix of Pabst Blue Ribbon Beer and Smirnoff v**...." The guy asks, "Good grief, what do you call that?" The bartender replied, "It's a "Pabst Smir.
A man dies in the widow orders a wreath for the f**...
She opts for simple "Rest in Peace" writing on the ribbon but then after a while she starts thinking that it's too short. So she calls the wreath maker and orders "Please add "I'll see you in Heaven" if there is space left." Happy with herself she hangs up. Then at the f**... she sees the wreath with "Rest in Peace" on one ribbon and "I'll see you in Heaven, if there is any space left" on the other.
What to you call Batman and Robin after they've been run over by a car?
Flatman and Ribbon
