Revolution Jokes
117 revolution jokes and hilarious revolution puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about revolution that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
This article looks at revolution jokes, examining the humor of different types of revolution, such as the American, French, Industrial, Neolithic, Market, Dance Dance and Agricultural Revolutions. It also covers the comedy of rebellion and revolt, from ancient mutinies to modern communist uprisings. Discover the light-hearted jokes and puns of revolutionary history.
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Funniest Revolution Short Jokes
Short revolution jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The revolution humour may include short changer jokes also.
- My boyfriend keeps talking about overthrowing capitalism in a violent revolution Could this be a red flag?
- What do South American governments and internal combustion engines have in common? Both are measured in revolutions per minute.
- How many communists does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, we just sit in the dark complaining about capitalism.
But come the light-bulb revolution everything will be brighter. - From the time it was discovered to the time it was declassified as a planet, pluto did not make a full revolution around the sun. It was a tough year.
- "It's a revolution!" I yelled at the top of my lungs. Scared the rest of the people on the Ferris wheel.
- How many Bolsheviks does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None - the lightbulb has the capacity for its own revolution
- I've been feeling really dizzy since yesterday I think I need to stop these New Year revolutions.
- Q: How many communists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: None. Each lightbulb contains the means of its own revolution.
- What did the Aristocrat say when he heard the French Revolution happening in the streets? Oh! What a peasant surprise!!
- Do you know why the communist takeover of russia lasted more than a year? It took more than one revolution.
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Revolution One Liners
Which revolution one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with revolution? I can suggest the ones about rotation and impact.
- Anyone can use my French Revolution joke It's royalty free.
- What happened after the wheel was invented a revolution
- Why don't revolutions work? Because after one revolution you're back where you started.
- I achieved my New Year's revolution from last year. I made it all the way around the sun.
- They say revolution breeds revolution. Resistance is fertile.
- What is the most important part of jokes about the French revolution? The execution
- Did you hear about the invention of the wheel? They say it started a revolution.
- It's almost 2018! My New Year's revolution is to proofread more.
- What do you call it when everyone spins round once? A communist revolution.
- Why did the dyslexic, Russian astronomer hate the revolution? He was following the Tsar.
- What is the favorite scientific unit of the French? RPM ( Revolutions Per Minute )
- I just changed my car engine to France. Gonna have tons of revolutions now!
- A communist revolution seems a bit suspicious I mean, they always raise a few red flags.
- Why did the Russian Revolution go so well? They aimed for the tsars!
- What do you call a cowardly revolution? A chicken coup.
French Revolution Jokes
Here is a list of funny french revolution jokes and even better french revolution puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- To think, Louis and Marie-Antoinette almost won the French Revolution. They were neck and neck.
- Ever seen the play about the French Revolution? The scene with Marie Antoinette was perfectly executed.
- What was the primary role of the aristocrats during the French revolution? They put their head into it.
- Why is the French Revolution just like Prohibition? They both got rid of Bourbon!
- I was telling a great joke about the importance of the guillotine in the French Revolution... But it didn't really land.
I guess execution really is key - Did you hear the one about the French Revolution? It's a riot
- During the French Revolution, what was the executioner's catch phrase? First come, first severed!
- Why were nobles decapitated during the French Revolution? The peasants thought they were getting just too far a head.
- The three most historically important revolutions The Russian
The French
And the dance dance - There was a printing error on my textbook about the French revolution All the headings got cut off.
American Revolution Jokes
Here is a list of funny american revolution jokes and even better american revolution puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- On the subject of American independence, did you know that the Revolution was initially viewed as a breach of contract? They heard that the Americans violated the teas and seas.
- Did you know George III never even bothered to leave his couch during the American Revolution? He was sofa king comfortable.
- Why were the first soliders ready to enter a battle in the American Revolution so bad in bed? They were all minutemen.
- What type of colonists were the funniest in the American Revolution? Punsylvanians!
- After the American Revolution, Thomas Paine celebrates by purchasing a new pair of shoes. He declares that these are the times to try men's soles.
- What did they cal the museums they put Loyalists in after the American Revolution? Observe-a-Torys.
Industrial Revolution Jokes
Here is a list of funny industrial revolution jokes and even better industrial revolution puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Why did workers in the industrial revolution have better sense of smell? It's because of all that time they spent in the ol-factory.
- What did children used to celebrate on thei r date of birth when Industrial Revolution took place? Labor day.
- Why did everyone in the Industrial Revolution have such good confidence. Everything ran off Self-Esteem-Engines.
- What was the Industrial Revolution's motto? Resistance is Fuedal!
Amusing Revolution Jokes to Make You Laugh with Friends
What funny jokes about revolution you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean progress jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make revolution pranks.
A priest, a drunkard, and an engineer are taken to the guillotine...
On a beautiful Sunday afternoon in the midst of the French Revolution the revolting citizens led a priest, a drunkard and an engineer to the guillotine. They ask the priest if he wants to face up or down when he meets his fate. The priest says he would like to face up so he will be looking towards heaven when he dies. They raise the blade of the guillotine and release it. It comes speeding down and suddenly stops just inches from his neck. The authorities take this as divine intervention and release the priest.
The drunkard comes to the guillotine next. He also decides to die face up, hoping that he will be as fortunate as the priest. They raise the blade of the guillotine and release it. It comes speeding down and suddenly stops just inches from his neck. Again, the authorities take this as a sign of divine intervention, and they release the drunkard as well.
Next is the engineer. He, too, decides to die facing up. As they slowly raise the blade of the guillotine, the engineer suddenly says, "Hey, I see what your problem is ..."
A few disenfranchised primates got together to start a revolution..
..they called it 'Gorilla Radio'..
What bird is most likely to inspire a revolution?
A pigeon... "Coup, coup"
How many Marxists' does it take to change a lightbulb?
None; within the lightbulb are the seeds of it's own revolution.
When our solar system was formed, the Sun was in charge...
So the planets started a revolution.
A Mexican immigrant was asked what he does for a living.
"I am a professional boxer."
"A professional boxer?"
"Yes, yes. Everyone in my family is a professional boxer.
We box onions, linens, tomatoes..."
Giving credit where credit's due: This joke was taken from a bit done by Gabriel Iglesias on his show "Stand-Up Revolution".
My thoughts on the French Revolution
Great concept, terrible execution.
Grammatical error
My friend was peer-reviewing my essay on the Russian Revolution in class today, when he pointed out that I had written lenin instead of Lenin. I looked him dead in the eye and said, "You never capitalize lenin."
What do you call the act of turning over in bed to switch from the m**... to d**...?
A s**... revolution.
With the recent events in the news...
My Facebook friends list is starting to look like the French revolution.
My wife asked me, "Do you think it's because of a potential revolution or school shootings that the government keeps trying to take our guns?"
I said, "A little of column A, a little of Columbine."
In calculus class we just finished revolutions of solids
It made my head spin.
iPhone 7 is revolutionary!
•no headphones jack
•no wireless charging
•no curved screen
•no 4K resolution (or even full HD) screen
•no VR headset support
•no 360 camera support
•no expansion storage slot
It is true revolution in scamming people to upgrade from old iPhones!
How many liberals does it take to change a lightbulb
None, because change can only come from a revolution of the working classes.
How many Socialists does it take to change a light bulb?
None comrade, the bulb holds the seeds to its own revolution!
What do you call an epic space opera set during the Russian Revolution?
Tsar Wars
The invention of the wheel created a...
revolution
I thought I could never be a good dancer until I discovered Dance Dance Revolution. Though I've only really mastered one move,
it's a step in the right direction.
How to start a revolution with change?
Just take a coin and give it a spin.
During the French Revolution a doctor, a lawyer, and an engineer were facing execution on the guillotine.
The doctor was first, but the blade jammed and the doctor was set free due to Divine Intervention.
The lawyer was next, again the blade jammed, and was also set free.
As the engineer was being led to his doom, he glanced up at the blade and said Wait a minute! I think I see the problem…
Why has the earth always failed to maintain a strong government?
Because it is constantly in revolution
What do the French monarchs before the French Revolution and frustums have in common?
They're both missing their top portions.
What do you say to your friend who's just birthed a revolution?
Molotov!
What do you call a cat that participated in the Chinese Cultural Revolution?
a Meowist
What do you call a communist revolution that failed due to poor word choice?
A miss-commune-ication
A soapbox orator addresses a crowd on the glories of communism
Come the revolution, everyone will eat strawberries and cream! A man at the front whimpers, But I don't like strawberries and cream. The speaker thunders, Come the revolution, you will like strawberries and cream!
Did I tell you about my new Soviet bike?
For some reason it can only do one revolution and then it stops working.
I'm going to start a revolution, who's with me?
Ok, now just roll this wheel with me.
What's the fastest spinning country?
France, because it has the most revolutions per minute.
I was sat on a merry-go-round thinking...
I need to start a revolution
A little son asks his father what a communism is...
...and the father starts explaining:
"Well, son, once upon a time there was this man named Lenin, except his real name was Uljanov. He had a friend named Stalin, except he wasn't his friend and his name was Dzugashvili. They started the October revolution, except it wasn't a revolution, it was a coup, and it wasn't in october, it was in november..."
"Jesus, dad, what a mess!" proclaims the son.
"Son, now you understand communism!"
What did the Soviets say during the 1956 hungarian Revolution?
Soviets:You're not you when you're Hungary. Have a tank.
Three men are talking in a Soviet gulag.
One of them asks the two others: "So what did you do?"
The first one answers: "Well, I arrived late at the factory, and so they accused me of slowing down the Revolution and the victory of the Proletariat."
The second one answers: "Well, I arrived early at the factory, and so they accused me of wanting to be favored and promoted over my fellow workers."
Then they turn to the one who asked the question: "How about you, then?"
"Well, I arrived at the factory right on time, and so they accused me of having a watch from the West."
Why can't engines remain government leaders?
Once the first revolution begins there's always thousands more.
Here is how we will know when the self-driving car revolution has truly arrived:
When you hear a country song about someone's truck leaving them
In 7th grade we had a quiz where we were asked "what did France set up during the French Revolution." They marked me wrong and I'm still a little upset about it.
I still maintain "tons and tons of guillotines" is a correct answer
How many Communists does it take to screw in a capitalist lightbulb?
Zero. The lightbulb contains the seeds of its own revolution.