Resource Management Jokes
6 resource management jokes and hilarious resource management puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about resource management that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Hilarious Resource Management Jokes to Make Your Friends Roar with Laughter
What is a good resource management joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.
A group of dwarves get jobs as coal miners
After a week or so, one of the workers really stood out and was getting special treatment from the supervisor, Moe. The other dwarves complained to HR and threatened to go on strike.
The supervisor was called into the office and reprimanded. He explained that he was only trying to keep the hardest worker motivated and asked exactly what he supposed to do, to which the Human Resources manager replied, Treat him like any mini miner, Moe.
I keep getting fired...
...and every time it happens, I walk into the Human Resources manager's office to find an alien sitting there coring apples with its pharyngeal jaws. Starting to see a pattern, I've come up with a device that will let me know *before* I enter the office, so I can merely pack up my things and go. I call it the HR Giger Counter.
I've always preferred management over human resources
I guess that's just a personnel preference
I've made a fortune through international human resource management!
Or 'human trafficking', as some call it.
Recently, a large corporation hired several cannibals
to increase their diversity...
... "You are all part of our team now," said the Human Resources rep during the welcoming briefing. "You get all the usual benefits and you can go to the cafeteria for something to eat, but please don't eat any employees."
The cannibals promised they would not.
Four weeks later their boss remarked, "You're all working very hard and I'm satisfied with your work. We have noticed a marked increase in the whole company's performance. However, one of our secretaries has disappeared. Do any of you know what happened to her?"
The cannibals all shook their heads, "No."
After the boss had left, the leader of the cannibals said to the others, "Which one of you idiots ate the secretary?" A hand rose hesitantly. "You fool!" the leader continued. "For four weeks we've been eating managers and no one noticed anything. But now, you had to go and eat someone who actually does something."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
h**... is speaking to his advisers...
He was surrounded by all of the lead managers and advisers of his entire r**.... His main adviser told him how amazing and efficient Germany was.
"All of ze industries are over performing and creating enough resources for ze new world. Except perhaps ze mining industry, sir. Zey are performing so vell, ve have TOO much ore! Should ve cut ze number of ores ve mine?"
h**... thinks for a bit and agrees with "Yes, then ve shall mine less ore,"
Just then, another adviser barged into the room and yelled: "MINE FEWER!"
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