The Best 70 Resistance Jokes
Following is our collection of funny Resistance jokes. There are some resistance resist jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.
Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these resistance tactical puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.
Top 10 of the Funniest Resistance Jokes and Puns
Whenever I write a letter to someone, I add a footnote briefly explaining Ohm's law.
It's my P.S. de resistance.
If electricity always follows the path of least resistance
Why doesn't lightning only strike in France?
Resistance is not futile...
It's voltage divided by current.
When it comes to getting things done, my work ethic is like lightning.
I take the path of least resistance.
The Irish have announced they've sent a peace keeping force to Ukraine.
They've managed to secure the city of Chernobyl without any resistance!
Masked man robs a sperm bank...
... He approaches the safe with a gun and yells at the nurse,
"Open up this safe!"
Nurse replied in fear, "But sir this is a sperm bank, we don't have any money here."
I said open up this safe now!" he yelled again and the nurse opened it up.
"Now drink this viel!"
"But sir this is sperm!"
"I said drink!" and the nurse drank with disgust.
"Drink another!" and she emptied another viel with less resistance.
The robber reveals his face and nurse found out that the robber was actually her husband.
"Now Sharon, was it really that hard?"
What do you call a love story between resistance and energy?
Omhmeo and Jouleiet
Everything can be reduced to a fart joke ...
Even physics:
We know that everything on earth falls at the same rate of acceleration, 32 feet per second per second. The difference comes down to mass and wind resistance, as shown by a flat piece of paper and one balled up. This means that the determining factor in your total decent is how much wind you break!
Why does lightning always strike trees?
They are the path of leaf resistance.
Why Do Bill Cosby's Lights Always Go Out?
He requested that the circuitry have no resistance.
Why did Blitzkrieg work so well in France?
Because lightning always follows the path of least resistance
You can explore resistance ohmless reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean resistance revolt dad jokes. There are also resistance puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
Why do Electricians make terrible revolutionaries?
They know resistance is a waste of energy.
If lightning always takes the path of least resistance...
why doesn't it always strike France?
What do you get when you put resistance on a stove?
Ohm on the range
Why does lightning strike in France so often?
Because it follows the path of least resistance.
Why do gyms produce the best Rebels?
Because of all the resistance training
Why should you always rent, rather than buy, a multimeter that measures ohms?
Because it's easier to follow the path of leased resistance.
The moist finger
As I slipped my finger slowly inside her hole, at first encountering resistance but then plunging in, I could immediately feel it getting wetter and wetter.
I took my finger back out and within seconds, before I knew it, she was going down on me.
And I thought to myself..... "I really need a new freakin' boat."
A Chemist, An Engineer, and A Statistician
A Chemist, an engineer, and a statistician are out in the woods hunting. The chemist says" Watch this" and fires his rifle. His shot lands five yards short of the deer. The engineer laughs and says "Watch this" and calculates for wind resistance. His shot lands five yards over the dear. The statistician suddenly stands up and screams "WE GOT HIM"
Monks teach peace and harmony, but they sure do seem to like resistance..
Ohmmmmmm.
"Would you like to partake in resistance training?"
"No."
"That's what I like to hear."
Which religion faces the most Resistance? Hinduism...
Om......
Why was Georg Ohm such a badass rockstar?
Because he knew a squared amp and resistance gave you power
I measured your Mother's resistance to being accelerated by a force.
The answer was massive.
They say revolution breeds revolution.
Resistance is fertile.
A falling Borg has no terminal velocity...
...Air resistance is futile.
Three high school students are standing outside the school...
When they notice thunder and lighting in the distance. The French exchange student throws his hands in the air, screams, and runs away. One student asks the other, "Why did he run away like that?" To which the other replies "He knows lightning always strikes the point of least resistance."
True story, changed setting for simplicity.
What did the borg say to the medieval peasant?
Resistance if feudal
Why is their always lightning in France?
Obviously, since lightning takes the path of least resistance.
Wheelchair tax
The new tax on wheelchairs has been met with major resistance, with some users refusing to stand for it.
I do resistance training every day
It's called refusing to go to the gym
The Force Awakens could have been much shorter.
All the First Order had to do to get rid of the Resistance was to use a superconductor.
A group of lingerie models were protesting
They were met with stiff resistance
Physicist, Engineer and Statistician are out bow-hunting.
They see a stag about a hundred feet away. The Physicist takes a shot, but he forgets to allow for wind resistance and the arrow falls five feet short. The Engineer takes his shot, but he adds too much of a fudge factor and the arrow's five feet too far.
The statistician goes "Nice job guys, we got him!"
Why'd the air resistance committed suicide?
Because he's always being neglected
Engineering students are always confused by women...
....why do the ones with the most streamlined bodies put up the most resistance?
What insulator has the greatest electrical resistance?
your mohm
How much resistance can a Buddhist monk endure?
Ohmmmmmm............?
I finally had sex with my crush, like a borg
Her resistance was futile.
What do you call a group of electrons staging a coup?
The Resistance
A superconductor walks into a bar. The bartender says, Get out! We don't serve your kind here.
The superconductor left without resistance.
What is the French Resistance to the Nazis?
An occupational hazard.
The personal trainer at the gym advised me to try some resistance training. So far it's going really well.
I've resisted going to the gym for six days now.
Have you heard about Dr. Ohm?
Last I heard he was leading the resistance.
Why did the ambassador have extra resistance to harmful foreign bacteria?
He had diplomatic immunity.
Yttrium-barium-copper oxide walks into a bar
The bartender tells him, "We don't serve superconductors here."
He leaves without resistance.
Why do french people never go to space.
Because in space there is no resistance !
Lightning follows the path of least resistance
No wonder blitzkrieg worked so well against the French
Why does France have so many rivers?
Water follows the path of least resistance.
With great power...
Comes great Current squared Resistance.
Yeah, I need these mnemonics to pass tomorrow's electronics exam.
Why is the French military always shocked when they lose a battle?
Because electricity flows in the path of *least resistance*
What was the favourite dish of the french resistance?
An Ohm-lette
(du fromage)
Why are there so many rivers in France?
Water takes the path of least resistance
Don't understand why people offer up so much resistance?
You're not the ohmly one
Girls are like resistors...
The more resistance they have, the hotter they are.
Why are the Eiffel Tower lights so bright ?
French resistance is low.
I robbed an ohmless man last night.
There was no resistance
What does a resistance fighter eat for breakfast?
His Nom de guerre
When a storm trooper wants to avoid conflict, he travels like electric current...
Down the path of least resistance.
Why did the German cross the French road?
The road had the least resistance when crossing.
There is always resistance,
but it is futile.
You know what the scientists always say to build up resistance to distractions and channel nature
Ohmmmmmmmmmmmm
I used to be in the Resistance.
But I got so good at it that I started resisting them.
Bad punz 1
Got electrocuted at work today.
Didn't think That would happen to me.
I was shocked.
I know you're trying not to laugh,
But give up.
Resistance is futile.
This post isn't going anywhere.
One could say it appears to be static.
It Has taken all my will power to type these.
I hate my current self.
*facepalm*
Pls comment "NO PART 2 PLS GOD NO" so i can die a happy man.
Whats Tom Hanks Without Resistance?
Tanks
If you think you wrote a great letter, add a footnote at the end which explains Ohm's Law.
Then it'll be your P.S. de resistance.
Did you hear about the cockney hobo who offered no resistance to electrical current?
He was ohm-less.
Glad to see my Buddhist friends join and chant in the protests
Everyone knows the more Ohms- the greater the resistance.
If geologists like rock music and mortuary scientists like death metal, what kind of music do physicists like?
Physicists enjoy dubstep, mainly because you don't have to account for wind resistance in the drop
Water, Electricity and College students all have one thing in common...
They all follow the path of least resistance
Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the resistance accelerate jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.
We suggest to use only working resistance protest piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.