Hilarious Fun Requirements Jokes to Bring Joy & Laughter with Friends
A Mexican kid meets Donald Trump and says to him, I want to be President one day.
Trump says, Are you s**...? Are you an idiot? Out of your mind? Are you r**...?
The kid replies, You know what, I've changed my mind. Those are too many requirements.
A woman placed an ad in a news paper. 'I am looking for a male partner who needs to meet these three requirements.
1. He shouldn't beat me.
2. He shouldn't leave me.
Third and most important.
3. He should be great in bed.
One week later, her door bell rang, and she opened the door to find a man.
The man said, "Hi, I'm Peter. I don't have hands, so I can't beat you. I don't have legs so I can't leave you. I think I'm the guy."
The lady in an angry voice asked him back, "How the h**... are you supposed to be great in bed then? Didn't you read the third requirement?"
I think You're mistaken my lady.
Peter replied, "I rang the doorbell. Didn't I?"
A mexican kid tells D. Trump:
I want to be President!
Trump says: are you s**...? Are you an idiot? Out of tour mind? Are you r**...?
Kid says: you know what, never mind those are too many requirements.
What's the difference between tinder and amusement parks?
Amusement parks have realistic height requirements.
I tried out for the Marines but fell just short of their requirements
So they put me in the Navy since I was a sub-marine.
An elderly woman decides she wants a husband...
An elderly woman decides its time she starts looking for husband, so she puts out and ad in the local news paper stating:
LOOKING FOR A HUSBAND HE MUST:
•not beat me
•not leave me
•be good in bed
So with these simple requirements she waits a few days with no response, but then one morning she hers her doorbell ring and goes to answer it. Standing at the door is a man with no arms and no legs. She asks him, "Are you here about the ad?" he replied, "Yes, I meet all the requirements see, I have no arms therefor I cannot beat you, and I have no legs therefor I cannot leave you." she asks, "well are you good in bed?" the man responds, "I rang the doorbell didn't I?"
I tried to join the Marines.
But I fell short of their physical requirements. So they put me in the Navy since I was a sub-marine.
A Mexican boy meets Donald Trump
The Mexican boy says "One day, I'm going to be President of the United States!"
Donald Trump replied "Are you crazy?" "Are you r**...?" "Are you out of your mind?"
The Mexican boy pauses for a second and says "That's too many requirements for being President."
My project manager posted in linkedin 'When I die,I want my developers to carry my coffin so that they can put me down one last time"
I commented on that post
"For the first time ,you have mentioned the requirements clearly".
A woman placed an ad in a news paper...
'I am looking for a male partner who needs to meet these three requirements. He shouldn't beat me. He shouldn't leave me. He should be great in bed.'
Three days later, her door bell rang, and she opened the door to find a man.
The man said, "Hi, I'm Tim. I don't have hands, so I can't beat you. I don't have legs so I can't leave you. I think I'm the guy."
The lady in an angry voice asked him back, "How the h**... are you supposed to be great in bed then. Didn't you read the third requirement?"
Tim replied, "I rang the doorbell. Didn't I?"
The Coast Guard recently changed their minimum height requirements to 6'.
That way if the boat sinks everyone can just walk to shore.
You can explore requirements conform reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean requirements eharmony dad jokes. There are also requirements puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
A mexican kid walks up to Donald Trump...
And says, "One day I want to be a president like you."
Donald Trump is disgusted and replies, "Are you s**...? Are you r**...? Have you lost your mind?"
The Mexican kid then says, "Actually, I don't want to be president. Those are too many requirements."
Getting a job right out of college...
ENTRY LEVEL JOB OPENING:
Hiring recent college grads.
REQUIREMENTS: 5 years of experience, 6 Olympic gold medals, and super powers.
I tried donating s**... the other day, but they refused me.
The requirements they have are really strict there at the salvation army
What does changing a password and my wife have in common?
They both keep saying "the input provided does not meet the minimum length requirements."
An old woman joins a gang.
A little old lady wanted to join a biker club.
She went to a bar where she new they hung out and a big, hairy, bearded biker with tattoos all over his arms was at the entrance.
She proclaims "I want to join your biker club."
The guy was amused and told her that she needed to meet certain biker requirements before she was allowed to join. So the biker asks her "You have a bike?"
The little old lady says "Yea, that's my Harley over there" and points to a Harley parked in the parking lot.
The biker asks her "Do you smoke?"
The little old lady says "Yea, I smoke. I smoke 4 packs of cigarettes a day and a couple of cigars while I'm shooting pool."
The biker is impressed and asks "Well, have you ever been picked up by the Fuzz?"
The little old lady says "No, never been picked up by the fuzz, but I've been swung around by my n**... a few times."
A vegan applied but was rejected for a job at Burger King...
She didn't meat the requirements.
What do you call a Koala who doesn't meet the requirements?
Un-Koalified
What are the educational requirements to be a trophy wife?
2 D's and a F
Best part about mask requirements
I can huff gasoline at work, and none would be the wiser!
Kid: Dad I want to be in politics when I grow up
Dad: Are you insane? Have you completely lost your mind? Are you r**...?
Kid: Never mind there seem to be too many requirements
The entry requirements of the Polish Club are strict...
You have to have an untarnished reputation.
What do you call the requirements to be sad?
Crytearia.
