The Best 76 Republicans Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Republicans jokes. There are some republicans votes jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these republicans democratic puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Republicans Jokes and Puns

Why will the congress never impeach Trump?

Because the republicans always insist on carrying a baby to full term.

The problem with Trump jokes:

Republicans don't think they're funny, and Democrats don't think they're jokes.

How many Republicans does it take to change a lightbulb?

None. They're afraid of change- even if it makes the world a brighter place.


Republicans joke, How many Republicans does it take to change a lightbulb?

Republicans are the true snowflakes...

they're white, they're cold, and if you put enough of em together they'll shut down public schools

EDIT* Thanks for the gold! You popped my gold cherry!

its a joke folks. just a joke.

Someone should tell trump and his fellow Republicans that the constitution isn't a bible

You can't pick and choose which parts you want to obey.

How many Republicans does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. They only screw the poor.

What do condoms and taxes have in common?

Republicans are against them and democrats want more for schools.

Republicans joke, What do condoms and taxes have in common?

What color are your panties, babe?

Boy: What color are your panties, babe?

Girl: Why do you keep asking me stupid questions, don't you ever think about anything else?

Boy: Ok, do you think the republicans should support the congress with their decision to raise the debt ceiling ?

Girl:You know i am wearing your favourite purple lace panties..You want a pic?

So I've got some buddies...

They just so happen to be a high-ranking officials in Denver,Colorado. They're currently trying to get Republicans and Democrats to both agree to legalize medical marijuana to ease arthritis symptoms. I guess you could say I have friends in high places in high places in high places for joint support for joint support for joint support.

Looks like the Democrats were holding strong in the Midwest until the republicans got off work.

Why do Republicans make good DJs?

Because they know how to shut the House down.

You can explore republicans rnc reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean republicans moderate dad jokes. There are also republicans puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.

Why do Republicans hate lotion?

Because the directions say to apply it liberally.

Why are Republicans so easy to point out?

They're usually the elephant in the room

Republicans run for office by saying the government doesn't work...

Then they get elected and prove it.

What is the one thing that Democrats and Republicans can agree on?

They should allow guns at the Republican convention

What's the biggest difference between Republicans and Democrats?

Republicans sign their checks on the front, and democrats sign on the back.

Republicans joke, What's the biggest difference between Republicans and Democrats?

Why are there insulting names for liberals like libtard but none for Republicans?

Because calling someone a Republican is insulting enough

Its not surprising that Republicans lost two presidental races to Obama

In long races usually the guy from Kenya wins.

How are the homeless like votes?

Republicans have them thrown out.

I don't understand why people think Donald Trump is making republicans look bad...

Every time he speaks I appreciate Mitt Romney more and more.

Q: Why are Republicans always so strung up about 9/11?

A: Elephants never forget.

The problem with politics today...

Republicans treat people like dogs
Democrats treat dogs like people

Those "Run Hillary, Run!" bumper stickers are selling incredibly well

Democrats put them on the back of their cars, Republicans put them on the front!

There was a Political Drum-Off last week, sponsored by the mathletes...

Democrats and Republicans took turns showing off their best drum licks, while answering math problems in between.

Turns out the Republicans lost. They couldn't handle Al Gore rhythms.

I haven't seen the democrats this mad at republicans...

... Since they freed the slaves

Democrats have been really angry over the 2016 election results

The last time Democrats were THIS angry is when the Republicans took their slaves away

What do Republicans use for birth control?

Their personality.

If muslims want to get into the US, they can just pretend they're Christians.

You know, just like Republicans.

I thought Republicans were the stupidest people in the world for calling Obama "Hussein"

Then I saw the Democrats call Trump "Drumpf"

How can we get Republicans to care about climate change?

Blame it on the poor.

House republicans couldn't agree on contraceptive coverage...

... so they just pulled out instead.

Republicans might be worried that the "repeal and replace" failed...

But it's okay; burns are covered by the Affordable Care Act.

Survey finds that 1 in 3 Republicans are of below average IQ

The other two are Russian Hackers.

Concerning Michael Flynn

The real question on republicans minds right now: what happens to the validity of Flynn's testimony when he gets autism after receiving immunity?

How much in royalties did 50 Cent get paid by Republicans?

It's obviously a cover of Get Rich or Die Tryin'

Why do Republicans hate sick eagles?

Because they're illegals

How do you solve climate change?

Convince Republicans that rising temperatures are turning people gay.

Comey: He's guilty

Democrats: He's guilty

Trump: I'm guilty

Republicans: We may never get to the bottom of this

How to solve Global Warming:

Convince republicans that rising temperatures are turning people gay.

We should start calling the planet "unborn baby"

maybe then republicans would want to save it.

A plane full of republicans had been captured by al queda

They have posted a video online saying that unless the us government pays them ten million dollars, they will start returning them, one by one

How many Republicans does it take to change a light-bulb?


Trump lies, tells them it was changed and they sit in the dark.

It always shocks me when people say republicans are anti-communists

With trying to make abortions illegal, get rid of birth control, defund planned parenthood, those all are textbook examples of seizing the means of reproduction.

Why are republicans pro-life?

Can't molest what isn't born!

Republicans: "We couldn't possibly lose Alabama!"

Roy Moore: "hold my beer kids"

A train carrying republicans to a retreat crashed into a garbage truck.

It's all ok everybody. The trash was completely unharmed.

How many Republicans does it take to change a lightbulb?

The lightbulb just burned out; this is not the time to discuss it.

Why will Congress never impeach Trump?

Republicans insist on carrying a baby to full term, even if it was a drastic accident.

A blind answer poll was made to dads everywhere, whether they liked Republicans or Democrats.

The only answer they got back was "Yes."

They say that Republicans no longer embody the Christian values they preach...

That's a little unfair if you ask me. They follow the golden rule perfectly. Whoever has the gold, rules.

The Republicans keep saying we need more Jesus in our country.

So why they want to build a wall to keep them all out?

How many Republicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

None, they prefer to sit in the dark and blame liberals.

I can't believe all of those women voted yes to pass Kavanaugh out of the Judiciary committee.

Well, I mean they voted no, but to Republicans that means yes.

Every wonder why Republicans use two hands when they're drinking out of a water bottle?

It's to prevent it from trickling down.

Republicans and Democrats never agree on anything

Republicans said the temperature is -40° F
And democrats immediately said it was -40° C.

If liberals are libtards...

Doesn't that make republicans just plain ole retards?

Did you hear that Republicans finally found an appropriate movement to protest Coronavirus?

It's called The No Lives Matter Movement.

Why are Democrats considered more attractive than Republicans?

Never heard of a hot piece of elephant.

In a bid to entice republicans, Biden vows to pick up right where Reagan left off...

With rapidly detiorating mental health.

How many Republicans does it take to change a lightbulb?

None. Trump just says it's fixed and the rest of them sit in the dark and applaud

There's a new store where I live that only allows Republicans to shop there.

They say the customer is always right

Do you want to know why the republicans won't impeach Trump?

Because they believe in carrying a baby to full term.

How many Republicans does it take to change a lightbulb?


Change? That's socialism.

Why is Covid-19 such a problem for Republicans?

Because people that can't breathe turn blue.

What do Republicans and Democrats have in common?

Epsteins island.

How are republicans and democrats like divorced parents?

They care more about you hating the other person than they do about your well-being.

What do Joe Biden and trans people have in common?

Republicans want to block their transition

Breaking News: Supreme court has ruled that basic intelligence tests for Election voting is Discriminatory.

The judge said that it is unfair to block all Republicans from voting.

In the end, Trump cost Republicans the Presidency, the Senate, and the House

He actually did it.. he made America great again!

The republicans are right: It is a very dangerous precedent

I was shocked when the Republicans wouldn't vote to convict Trump on his second impeachment.

The first time sure, they always insist a baby is carried to full term.

The second one however, shocking as they actually took care of the baby afterwards.

I was trying to think of past Republicans similar to Marjorie Taylor Greene

But they just Palin comparison.

A Republican and a Democrat found a magic lamp

The genie said "I will grant one wish per person". The Republican immediately jumped forward and said "I wish all Republicans and conservatives had their own planet, separate from all these libs." The genie nodded and the Republican vanished. The Democrat then asked "Are they all on their own planet?" "Yes" said the genie. "Are you sure? All of them?" The genie said "Yes" one more time. Then the Democrat said "I guess I'll just have a glass of water then."

What did the Republicans do when Obama won the election 2 times in a row?

They pulled out their Trump card

Why can't republicans use hand sanitizer?

Because the directions say to apply liberally

A year after historic protests...

white, anti-vax Republicans are finally saying I can't breathe .

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the republicans dems jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working republicans centrist piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

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