republicans Jokes

funny jokes and hilarious republicans stories

What are the best Republicans puns and pranks?

Did you ever wanted to prank someone about Republicans? Well here is a complete list of Republicans dad jokes:

Why will the congress never impeach Trump?

Because the republicans always insist on carrying a baby to full term.

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Why will congress never impeach Trump?

Republicans always insist on carrying a baby to full term.

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Why won't the Republicans impeach Trump?

Because they insist on carrying a baby to full term

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The problem with Trump jokes:

Republicans don't think they're funny, and Democrats don't think they're jokes.

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How many Republicans does it take to change a lightbulb?

None. They're afraid of change- even if it makes the world a brighter place.

(

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Republicans are the true snowflakes...

they're white, they're cold, and if you put enough of em together they'll shut down public schools

EDIT* Thanks for the gold! You popped my gold cherry!

its a joke folks. just a joke.

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How many republicans does it take to change a lightbulb?

"Wait... What??! CHANGE???!!!"

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So I've got some buddies...

They just so happen to be a high-ranking officials in Denver,Colorado. They're currently trying to get Republicans and Democrats to both agree to legalize medical marijuana to ease arthritis symptoms. I guess you could say I have friends in high places in high places in high places for joint support for joint support for joint support.

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What do condoms and taxes have in common?

Republicans are against them and democrats want more for schools.

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How many Republicans does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. They only screw the poor.

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political joke

Republicans are Red
Democrats are Blue
and neither one
gives a fuck about you

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None of my relatives are members of any organized political party.

They're all republicans.

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Election One-Liner

Looks like the Democrats were holding strong in the Midwest until the republicans got off work..

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How many Republicans does it take to change a lightbulb?

None, he goes and gets his own flashlight.

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What color are your panties, babe?

Boy: What color are your panties, babe?

Girl: Why do you keep asking me stupid questions, don't you ever think about anything else?

Boy: Ok, do you think the republicans should support the congress with their decision to raise the debt ceiling ?

Girl:You know i am wearing your favourite purple lace panties..You want a pic?

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Someone should tell trump and his fellow Republicans that the constitution isn't a bible

You can't pick and choose which parts you want to obey.

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Why does America have so many boasting Republicans?

Because it needs some bragging rights.

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Why do Republicans use rulers?

They want everything to be straight.

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Why did the redneck's wife keep her pussy trimmed instead of clean shaven ?

Because all Republicans love a Little Bush

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How many Republicans does it take to change a lightbulb?

Just one really, but be prepared to spend about $8 million USD in "Campaign Donations" if you ever want one to care about somebody else's problem

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Republicans hate communism

Republicans hate communism, except when they want to seize the means of reproduction.

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I asked my grandma what people use to think of democrats and republicans over 70 years ago

*Watching the news with my grandma*

Me: Grammy, when you were really young, did they talk about democrats and republicans, like they do today?

Grandma: What do you mean?

Me: Were they always hostile towards one another, like this lady on the news.

Grandma: Oh yeah, that's one thing that has never changed over the years.

Me: Well, what do you remember people saying about democrats and republicans when you were young.

Me: What is the first thing you remember about it?

Grandma: Well, I always heard the older people say the same thing

Grandma: "Republicans are for the rich, and democrats are for the poor."

Me: What did they say about everyone in the middle?

Grandma: I don't know, they always just talked about getting screwed.

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Senate Republicans cancelled the vote on abortion restrictions. Does this mean they're going to try Plan B?

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Why do republicans hate math?

They were never comfortable with integration.

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Republicans and elections

The republicans wanted to have Jesus run for president. The plan had to be aborted though: he had a hole in his hand.

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It's strange that most republicans are homophobic...

especially when they're obsessed with screwing all the gay guys in the country.

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Why do Republicans oppose Gay Marriage AND Obamacare?

Because they hate mandates.

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Republicans want to reduce the size of government...

... so it can fit inside a vagina.

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How many Republicans does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Three. One to screw it in, one to call the media and publicize and one to blame the Democrats on the electric bill.

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[American Politics] Why do Republicans favor small government?

To bitter fit in my uterus.

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What does the fox say?

Go republicans!

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There are two things you never talk about in public: religion and politics. Or in the case of republicans...

...there is only one thing you never talk about in public.

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The republicans represent minority's too...

Such as the extremely wealthy.

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How many republicans does it take to change a lightbulb?

Change? What change? Nothing is changing, everything is fine. Anyone who thinks it's changing is a god-damn commie!

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Republicans are 100 times more likely to pass immigration reform if Obama doesn't take unilateral action...

...there's a 0.0000001% chance the GOP will pass reform if Obama acts, versus a 0.00001% chance they will if he doesn't.

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Mitt Romney

The Republicans tried to show Romney's softer side at last week's Republican Convention. Speaking of the matter, Mrs. Romney commented that the Presidential hopeful has no problem going soft. In fact, he's been going soft ever since the conception of their last son in 1981.

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CONCLUSION

You've red some of the best republicans jokes of all time. We hope you had fun with this collection of 36 puns about republicans. Most of the stories are suitable for kids with good sense of humor, children or teens boys and girls, of course dads. You must supervise your chidlren not to read pranks for adults. Note that some jokes are disgusting, filled with black humor so don't tell dirty republicans gags to your kids. So please respect and be a good joking daddy !

How do I make my girlfriend or boyfriend laugh? How do you make someone laugh? Well, this list of funny stories will make you cry in laughter just like dad jokes. Some of these republicans jokes are funny and some are hilarious. With this collection it's easy to be a joker. Have fun and dig deeper into our archive.

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