Repost Jokes
106 repost jokes and hilarious repost puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about repost that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Repost Short Jokes
Short repost jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The repost humour may include short post jokes also.
- Where do little jokes come from? Well, a dad joke meets yo momma joke and then they knock knock.
- My annual cake day joke repost - how can you tell the difference between a plumber and a chemist? Ask them to pronounce unionized
- Is this the right sub? Need help repairing my fence. It seems everyone knows how to repost here.
- What is matthew mcconaughey' least favorite part of interstellar? "The girls get older, but he stays the same age"
-first attempt at a original joke (apologies if its a repost that I'm unaware of) - Yesterday I accidentally sent a n**... picture of myself to everyone in my address book. Not only was it embarrassing but it cost a fortune in stamp.
- How can you tell someone hates vegans, cross fitters, and atheists? Don't worry, they'll repost a joke about it.
- I'm having some real trouble mending my broken fence. Can anyone here give me some tips?
I was told you guys are the best at reposting. - If I had a dollar for every time I saw that rabbit typo joke reposted here I'd be a millionhare
- Today I was helping a friend install his fence, but I put in one of the stakes upside down so we had to do it over. Sorry for the repost.
- The new Call of Duty just got released in Iraq They call it the Sims
Note: this technically a repost
Share These Repost Jokes With Friends
Repost One Liners
Which repost one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with repost? I can suggest the ones about unoriginal and disclaimer.
- Reposting this one because it didn't get enough upvotes last time. 1
- Roses are red, reposting is lame, [this post was removed due to a copyright claim.]
- What do you get when you eat 3.14 slice of cake? Diabetes.
- What do you call when you cross a detective with an electrician Sherlock Ohms
- Why are there two "d"s in Reddit? The second one's a repost.
- What's the difference between a joke and a repost??? ...about two hours.
- What does Vlad the Impaler do when he runs out of victims? Repost.
- What's the difference between an octopus and a squid? A squid has TEN-TICKLES!
- Okay guys, that's enough Russian reposts today. I'm sick of Putin up with it.
- Roses are red, reposting is lame, But not every joke here is always the same.
- The F in orphans stands for family If ykyk (I'll remove if it's a repost)
- I have a spreadsheet of all the Abe Lincoln reposts. I call them my Lincoln logs.
- Scrolling this sub is like fixing a fence that's fallen. Repost. Repost. Repost.
- Why do environmentalists love this sub? Reword, Repost, Recycle!
- Yo mama so old, She remembers the first repost.
Witty Repost Jokes for Laughter-Filled Fun with Friends
What funny jokes about repost you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean edit jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make repost pranks.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
So there's a little guy sitting at a bar....(heard this years ago, hope it isn't a repost)
...when a much larger, muscular guy walks in who seems to have a chip on his shoulder. The big guy sits down next to the little guy and orders a beer, after a bit the big guy jumps up and completely out of nowhere punches the little guy, knocking him to the floor. "That's boxing, from Las Vegas."
The little guy picks himself up off the floor, dusts himself off, gets back on his stool and just quietly goes back to his drink. The big guy also sits back down, but after a few minutes he gets back up and kicks the little guy who slides all the way to the end of the bar. "That's karate, from Japan."
Again, the little fellow just quietly gets up, goes back to his seat, and resumes drinking. A few more minutes go by and the big fella gets up a third time, grabs the little dude, and throws him right into the door of the bar. "That's kung fu, from China."
This time, however, the little guy gets up and just walks out. After some time he walks back in, right up behind the big guy, and cracks him over the head, laying him unconscious in the floor. The little guy looks at the bartender and says "You tell that s**... when he wakes up that that was crowbar, from Sears and Roebuck."
Tiger Woods playing golf.
Sorry if this is a repost, but I found this one quite funny.
Tiger Woods is practicing golf one day, surrounded by fans and media. While he's practicing, an amateur
golfer confidently walks up to him and challenges him to a match. Tiger knew he'd win, so he agrees thinking that it would be a fun break from serious practice. "OK," the amateur says, "Since I'm an amateur and you're a pro, you'll have to allow me two gotchas". Tiger didn't know what a gotchas is, but he didn't ask because he thought he'd win regardless of what handicap is placed on him. The fans and media leave the two alone so they can play in peace.
A few hours later, the two come out of the golf course and it turns out that Tiger Woods lost. The fans and media surrounded him wanting to know what happened. Tiger says, "I was starting the first hole, concentrating to tee off, you know, deep in thought. Right when I was about to drive the ball, he ran up from behind, grabbed my nuts and squeezed them tight while loudly screaming 'GOTCHA!!' can you imagine me trying to play eighteen holes waiting for the next gotcha?"
This is not a joke, just wanted to say this.
A repost means nothing other than a Joke worth re-telling.
Re-post but one of my all time favorites (somewhat altered)
One day a father and his two daughters, Petal and Fridge, were having a picnic. Petal curiously asks her father; "Daddy, why is my name Petal?" to which he replies; "Well honey on the day you were born a petal from a beautiful flower slowly fell through the air and landed right on your forehead. Your mother and I thought the name fit you perfectly." Then Fridge asks; "BRAW WAW AAWWW OOWWW AHH AAWA?"
Did you guys hear about the award winning farmer?
Apparently he was outstanding in his field. [modified repost]
4 gay guys walk into a bar...
They find that there is only one barstool, the ponder for a second, until one says, "why don't we just flip it over?"
(Sorry if its a repost)
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A New Study Conducted on Asians (A joke I came up with,but still not sure if a repost)
A new study conducted on Asians shows that the long held to be true stereotype is partially false. In fact, only 50% of Asians have small p**....
The other 50% are women.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A young couple is out carousing one evening...(could be repost)
While driving down the highway the guy says to the girl, "If I go 100 miles an hour, will you t**... clothes?" She agrees and he begins to speed up.
When the spedometer hits 100 she starts to s**.... When she gets all her clothes off he is so busy staring at her that he drives off the road and flips the car. The girl is thrown clear without a scratch but her clothes and her boyfriend are trapped in the car. "Go get help," he pleads.
She replies, "I can't, I'm n**...."
He points to his shoe that was thrown clear and says "Cover yourself with that and go get help." She takes the shoe, covers herself, and runs to the gas station down the road.
When she arrives she is frantic and yells to the attendant, "Help! Help! My boyfriend's stuck!"
The attendant looks down at the shoe covering her c**... and replies, "I'm sorry Miss. He's too far in."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Jimmy and Joey (never seen this here so sorry if repost)
One day Jimmy and Joey were walking through their neighborhood looking for something to do.
Jimmy then shouted, " JOEY LOOK A n**... LADY"
Joey looked and sure enough there was a woman sunbathing by her pool n**....
Joey then screamed very loudly and ran away in a panic.
Jimmy was very puzzled at why Joey ran, so he chased down Joey to see what happened.
He catches Joey and asks him, "Why are you running away? We finally got to see a n**... lady."
Joey responded, "My mamma always told me that if I ever saw a person n**... I would turn to stone, and back there I felt something get hard.
What's the opposite of Christopher Reeves?
Christopher Walken.
(Not sure if it's a repost, but I don't think I've seen it posted here.)
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
You know your life s**......
when your job s**..., your car s**..., your house s**..., but your wife doesn't.
- Sorry if it's a repost.
My car started making this whining noise...
So I took it to the shop and had the mechanic look over it. Turns out all he had to do was take the Taylor Swift album out.
Sorry if this was a repost, I took a quick browse and didn't see it anywhere.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Three guys are talking about their families (likely a re-post)
Three men - Bob, Joe, and David - are bragging about their families. Bob and Joe are Catholic, and David is m**....
Joe says "I've got four athletic daughters. One more and I'll have a championship basketball team."
Bob responds "I've got eight athletic sons. One more and I'll have an all-Anerican baseball team."
David answers "I've got five beautiful wives. One more and I'll have a golf course."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Hope it's not a repost, heard this on the radio today...
Cheech and Chong are partying down in Tijuana, when they spot a dog up the road a ways.
Looking closer, they see the dog is frolicking about in the intersection, having a great time l**... himself.
Cheech exclaims, "Man! I wish I could do that!"
Chong replies, "well... maybe you should try to pet him first, man."
A Buddhist walks up to a hot dog vendor...
A Buddhist walks up to a hot dog vendor and says "make me one with everything".
Sorry if this is a repost. Saw it on an IMDb movie discussion thread a while back, thought it was pretty good
What did the Pirate say on his 80th Birthday?
I don't know, but I'm sure someone is gonna repost this
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Did you hear about the paperboy who m**... on the job?
It was all over the news!
(Can't remember where I heard this, so sorry if its a repost)
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Met a h**... who said she'd do anything for $5
So I had her repost a joke for me that's been posted 5,000 times in the past week
I know this is probably a repost and I'm sorry, but I had to write this joke again.
This joke again.
What's the difference between a repost and a bullet?
I don't want to put a repost in my mouth
If Hillary wins I'm leaving the country if trump wins I'm leaving the country.
Not a political repost I'm just getting deported
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What's the difference between Isaac Newton and the baby I just stabbed to death?
Isaac Newton died a v**....
Repost.
Scientists have deciphered hieroglyphics thought to be 5,500 years old. The first full sentence says
"This is a repost."
I was going to repost this really condescending joke I read, but...
you guys didn't get it last time, and probably wont get it this time either.
I bought my son a trampoline
But all he wanted to do was sit and cry in his wheelchair
- This was a repost but I thought it was too funny not to share
A woman gives birth to a bouncing baby boy...
(Sorry if repost, I did a search)
A woman gives birth to a bouncing baby boy and the doctor hands him to her, remarking, "That's a cute baby!"
Mom says, "Oh I bet you say that about every baby you deliver."
Doctor says, "No no, only when they're really cute."
"What do you say when they're ugly?"
"He looks just like his mother!"
I told my wife she drew her eyebrows too high
She told me she's tired of my repost BS and divorced me. It was definitely a surprise.
It seems highly unlikely that the Romans would have built a new cross for every execution, which means...
Jesus was a repost.
I was gonna tell you all a joke about how I had to replace the wood holding up my fence...
But I was afraid it is only a repost.
Did you hear about the retired soldier that got mustard gassed and pepper sprayed by the police?
He's now a seasoned veteran.
Not sure if this is a repost, one of my friends told me this
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
How many vegans does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Three.
One to screw in the lightbulb. The second to tell you they are vegans.
The third because I don't want this to be a repost.
Lawyer: My client is trapped inside a penny
Judge: What?
Lawyer: He's in a cent
Judge: You're going to jail with him
^^^^Totally ^^^^my ^^^^own ^^^^work ^^^^and ^^^^not ^^^^a ^^^^repost ^^^^by ^^^^any ^^^^mean
If I got a dollar every time a joke was reposted
Somebody would repost this joke and be richer than me
What happens when you put nutella on Salmon?
You get salmonella
Sorry if it's a repost. My friends just told me it:)
Amy Schumer is so unpopular now
No one has even bothered to repost the two cannibals joke in months.
A priest, a doctor and an engineer walk into a bar..
.. The bartender glances at them as they enter the door and starts pouring drinks. Before they reach the counter their preferred drinks are ready for them. The engineer asks the bartender "How did you know what drinks we wanted?". The bartender mumbles "Repost from yesterday"
How do you call a bouncy airplane?
A Boing.
P.S. I came up with this on my own, yet have a feeling it mist've been here already, so please tell me if it's a repost. Thanks!
Its not a repost
My friend and I came up with a joke and raced to see who could post it first. I just lost by 2 months.
During the prostate exam I asked the doctor, "where should I put my pants?"
"Over there by mine", was not the answer I was expecting.
This is a repost from two years ago, all credits to u/-stillborn-
A Bee on a Fly
(Disclaimer) this is a repost from something I saw a long time ago, so if someone could get a source that'd be very cool
A bee is riding on the back of a fly. The fly turns around, and asks, hey, are you a bee?
In which the bee replies, I might bee.
The fly then says, dude, that's the worst pun I have ever heard.
The bee responds, I know man, I made it up on the fly.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
My wife makes me feel like a s**... object.
Every time I offer s**...... she objects!
I'm sure this is a re-post from somewhere.
While airplanes may not be my favorite thing,
They're up there.
Repost, haven't seen it in a while.
A farmer's wire fence was broken, so he put new wood into the ground and ran wire across it.
This is a repost.
Reposting a joke is like buying a piece of clothing...
you use other people's material to make yourself look good.
What do you call a green bat that walks across a yellow bridge?
I don't know, but at least it isn't a repost
Teach a man to joke and he'll be funny for a lifetime,
tell a man a joke and he'll repost it every day.
To the guy that's bad at building fences...
Oops, wrong place for this post.
Figured i'd put it in the right place and re-post it for you.
If I had $1 for every repost in this sub...
I'd have the same dollar given to me over and over again.
A lot of people complain about reposts, but I ran the numbers and only about 0.2% of people actually repost jokes here
Earth has ~7 and a half billion people; this sub only has ~14 million
A man was walking through town when he noticed a guy working on a fence by their house. "Making a new fence?" the man asked. The guy responded "Nah."
"Just a repost."
What's better? Original content or a repost?
A repost.
Why?
Because nothing is better than original content but a repost is better than nothing.
What does the Freudian monk chant while meditating?
MOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMM!
(Sorry if repost, I just thought of this, but I can't be the first)
I've just searched for half an hour to see if the joke I was going to post was a repost
It wasn't, so I'm going to have to think of another one.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A big m**... and a little m**... were standing on a bridge, the big m**... fell off
The other was a little more on.
(Sorry if this is a repost, I just remembered my dad telling it forever ago and thought I'd share because it made me chuckle)
A man wins big...
*pardon if this is a repost*
A gig worker hits a convenience store on the way home, and buys some juice, a sausage croissant, and a scratcher. Once outside he scratches the card, and wins $400 dollars. The guy collects his winnings and heads home.
When he arrives, he asks his wife "What would you do if I won the lottery?"
She replies "I'd take half the money and leave you."
"Great! I just won $200 tonight, here's $100 -- enjoy your half."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A Russian dude enters a bar wearing a tshirt saying, "Turks got 3 problems."
Obvious repost
As soon as he enters the bar a bunch of Turks stop him.
Turks: you come in our country and have the b**... to insult us.
Russian : that's your first problem. you guys gets offended so easily.
Turks: Let's get him outside.
Russian: that's your second problem. you wanna solve everything with violence.
*They gets outside of the bar and Turks starts taking their knives out*
Russian: that's your third problem. you bring knives to a gunfight.
What do you call cold Mexican food?
A Brrrr-rito.
Guess what I had for breakfast. Apologies if repost.
For my first cake day I was just going to do a repost of someone else's cake joke.
But then I thought....
Nah, I could do batter.
Teach a man how to joke and he'll get 6 upvotes
Teach a man how to repost, and watch him get loads of awards
My friend told this to me the other day, so I apologize if this is a repost or anything like that.
A man is pulled over for speeding.
Police Officer: Sir, were you aware you were going 68 MPH on a 45?
Man: No sir.
Officer: Well, you were, and that's far too high. You'll have to be in court.
Man: Well, can you at least raise the number a bit so we can get the judge to say it?
Officer: I guess I can.
\*In the courtroom
Judge: How were you going 420 on a 45?!?
Reposting my favorite joke for cakeday!
So a string walks into a bar, bartender says "we don't serve your kind here." The string walks out, parts and ruffles his hair and walks back in. The bartender asks "Aren't you the same guy from earlier?". The string replies "I'm a FRAYED KNOT".
Teach a man a joke, and he will laugh for a day.
Teach a redditor a joke, and they will repost it for a lifetime.
It's cake and y'all know the rules!
I got bullied by a bunch of redditors after fixing my fence
Apparently, I'm not supposed to repost things
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
It was a sad and disappointing day when I discovered my Universal Remote Control did not, in fact, control the Universe.
Not even remotely.
(I stole this joke from fb and it made my drunk a**... laugh out loud so I wanted to share but I'm sorry if it's a repost)
Bad eye sight (Possibly a repost but I didn't want to keep scrolling past page 30276 to confirm)
Patient: doctor i think my eye sight is deteriorating. I cant see very far
Doctor: really? come over to the window. Now what is that big round yellow thing in the sky?
Patient: well that's the sun
Doctor: yep! so how much further do you want to see
Pierre Curie walks into his lab and says to his wife: "Marie, everyday you look more radiant."
[could be a repost]
Why are reposts always upvoted more than original jokes?
You need to tell it to a redditor multiple times for them to get it.
What's the difference between a new AAA and a violent offender?
One's a battery with charge and the other's charged with battery
*I came up with this myself but in case someone beat me to this one, not meant to be a repost*
First five days
First five days after the weekend are the worst...
Ps. hope it's not a repost, couldnt find it with search function
