JokoJokes

Repeat Jokes

160 repeat jokes and hilarious repeat puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about repeat that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Do you have a joke that you've heard time and time again, but can't help but laugh at? We explore why people repeat jokes and how it can help different types of comedians, lecturers, and more. Learn more about the relevance of jokes, when it's okay to repeat them, and how to make the experience even better with comparisons between "Pete and Repeat" and redoing a joke after rehearsal.

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Popular Repeat Short Jokes

Short repeat jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The repeat humour may include short loop jokes also.

  1. When I was in high school, my dad f*cked my teacher repeatedly for better grades in my math class. Thank god im homeschooled or that could have been wierd
  2. Poll: Have You Ever Watched Malcom in the Middle? [YES]
    [NO]
    [MAYBE, I DON'T KNOW]
    [CAN YOU REPEAT THE QUESTION?]
  3. A programmer got stuck in the shower because... The instructions on the shampoo bottle said-
    "Lather, Rinse, Repeat."
  4. A joke my 10yr old sister has been repeating five times a day: where do cows live? Moo York.
  5. Man: Judge, 60% of my traffic tickets are bogus! Judge: Repeat infractions?
    Man: Ok. 3/5 of my traffic tickets are bogus!
  6. Judge, 60% of my parking tickets are bogus!! Judge: Repeat infractions?
    Man: Fine. 3/5 of my parking tickets are bogus!!
  7. Tips to reduce weight…
    First turn your head to the right and then to the left.
    Repeat this exercise whenever your offered something to eat!
  8. Want to know what the definition of insanity is? The definition of insanity is mindlessly repeating a quote that Einstein never said.
  9. What does the white supremacist pirate say? Well I'm not gonna repeat it but it ends with a hard Arrrr!
  10. I keep reading about all these patriots, draped in bright colors and repeating exactly what is said to them, though without any real understanding. Did they maybe mean to write "parrots?"

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Repeat One Liners

Which repeat one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with repeat? I can suggest the ones about resume and practice.

  1. Greta Thunberg would be proud of this sub The content is very repeatedly recycled.
  2. Aristotle said we are what we repeatedly do. Therefore, I am your mother.
  3. I spent the last hour repeatedly pressing F5 It's pretty refreshing.
  4. Do you want to hear a joke about a ghost? That's the spirit.
  5. A programmer got stuck in the shower... because the bottle said rinse and repeat.
  6. Why do Ivan Pavlov's dogs have the shiniest and softest fur? Repeated conditioning.
  7. I don't make mistakes twice I repeat them five or six times just to make sure.
  8. What did Saint Peter name his first born son? Saint Repeater
  9. Have you ever been hit repeatedly by a wave? It hertz a lot
  10. Why do English kids repeat the alphabet only to the letter S? After S is tea time.
  11. I could tell you a joke about TCP.... But I'd have to keep repeating it until you got it.
  12. I heard a joke about an echo. It won't stop repeating itself.
  13. How do you kill a clown? Stab it repeatedly
  14. Why was the repeating offender upset with his lawyer? He was on his case, again.
  15. Did you hear how the deaf electrician asked his friend to repeat what he said? Watt?

Repeat Day Jokes

Here is a list of funny repeat day jokes and even better repeat day puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • Why did the kangaroo cross the road? It was hopping mad!
    *My 5 year old niece made this up. I don't get it. She's been repeating it and giggling the whole day. I have to pretend to understand it.*
  • Breaking News: Study finds that the average man says 10,000 words a day, while women say 20,000. Woman: That's because we have to repeat everything we say!
    Man: What?
  • I once read the directions on the back of my shampoo bottle. It said to wash, rinse, and repeat. They found me passed out in the shower four days later.
  • Somebody asked if I could explain what pi day was again. I told him I didn't want to repeat myself.
  • If you do not say it, they can't repeat it.
  • Was talking to a friend about taking many baths a day. "There's no harm in taking baths repeatedly unless you are soap."
  • I heard a joke about the swiss the other day But the punch line was too cheesy to repeat.
  • What time does Sean Connery turn up at Wimbledon? Ten-ish
    Thought it was an appropriate day to repeat it.
  • I heard a rude joke about Grizzlies the other day... ...but it doesn't bear repeating.
  • Although I have to repeat myself several times for my children to listen, I take great comfort knowing that one day nothing will annoy them more than me repeating myself.

Pete And Repeat Jokes

Here is a list of funny pete and repeat jokes and even better pete and repeat puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • Pete and Repeat were on a boat in the middle of a lake. Pete fell off. Who's left?
  • Pete and Repeat are in a boat. Pete falls out. Who is left? Repeat.
    Pete and Repeat are in a boat. Pete falls out. Who is left?
  • Pete and Repeat were sitting on a fence. Pete fell off, who was left?
  • Pete and repeat went down to the lake. Repeat fell in.
  • Pete and Repeat were in a boat. If Pete fell off, who would be left? Actually that depends. What if it's nobody cause Pete was on the left side?
  • Pete and Repeat went into a bar, Pete came out who was left?
Repeat joke, Pete and Repeat

Repeat 10 Times Jokes

Here is a list of funny repeat 10 times jokes and even better repeat 10 times puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • Ice Bank Mice Elf (repeat this 10 times fast)

Repeat After Me Jokes

Here is a list of funny repeat after me jokes and even better repeat after me puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • I named my first dog "What". Only now did I just realize why the guy on tech support was getting so angry when he repeatedly asked "What is the name of your first pet?" and I kept answering "Yes."
  • Do you know how to make Notre Dame style eggs? You put them in a bowl way too big for it...and then beat repeatedly for 3 hours
  • For you internet nerds! I would tell you a UDP joke, but you might not get it.... I would tell you a TCP joke but I don't want to keep repeating it.
  • Johnny repeatedly said he was gonna win the defamation case Which proves that Amber Heard, but didn't listen
  • Those who fail to learn history are doomed to repeat it. Those who fail to clear their history are doomed to explain it.
  • My friend died when he couldn't remember his blood type ... He kept repeating "Be Positive" as he was in my arms, but it's really hard to stay positive without him.
  • I needed some white noise yesterday to go to sleep. So i recorded myself saying "All lives matter" and played it on repeat until i fell asleep.
  • After watching me sign up for a Greek philosophy course, my dad said, Did you know Aristotle said that we are what we repeatedly do? Therefore, I'm your mother.
  • I've heard the only 15 letter word that can be spelled without repeating a letter is uncopyrightable. Which is a shame, because I was hoping to use it as a book title.
  • You know what I hate about some of the jokes submitted to this sub? You know what I hate about some of the jokes submitted to this sub?
    When people repeat the title in the description.
Repeat joke, You know what I hate about some of the jokes submitted to this sub?

Make fun with this list of one liners, jokes and riddles. Each joke is crafted with thought and creativity, delivering punchlines that are unexpected and witty. The humor about repeat can easily lighten the mood and bring smiles to people's faces. This compilation of repeat puns is not just entertaining but also a testament to the art of joke-telling. The jokes in this list are designed to display different humor styles, ensuring that every reader at any age finds something entertaining. Constantly updated, they offer a source of fun that ensures one is always smiling !

Amusing & Witty Repeat Jokes for Laughter-Filled Fun

What funny jokes about repeat you can tell and make people laugh? One example I can give are clean sequence jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help make repeat prank.

Which song does the s**... donor play in repeat?

Dire Straits - Money for Nutting

Skip a Day

During an annual physical, a doctor tells his overweight patient, "You need to lose some weight, so try this diet. I want you to eat regularly for two days, then skip a day, and repeat this procedure for two weeks. The next time I see you, I expect you will have lost five to ten pounds."
When the man returns, he's lost over 20 pounds. The doctor says. "Great job, did you follow my instructions?"
The man nods "I did, but I thought was going to drop dead every third day."
"From hunger?" asked the doctor.
"No, from skipping."

I was at the dentist yesterday

As he was inspecting my teeth, he poked and prodded and scraped one of my back molars that was particularly sore. He leaned closer for a better look, and said to me, "That's the biggest cavity I've ever seen! That's the biggest cavity I've ever seen!"
I was kind of offended. "Doc, I'm not s**... or deaf, you didn't have to repeat yourself."
"I wasn't repeating myself, that was the echo!"

So a Lecturer tells a joke in the class. . .

. . .and then one of the students raises his hand and says "but sir you told that joke last year" the lecturer replies "if you can repeat things then so can I"

Police Lineup

Police in Los Angeles had good luck with a robbery suspect, who just couldn't control himself during a lineup. Detectives asked each man in the lineup to repeat the words, "Give me all your money or I'll shoot."
One of them, when it was his turn, shouted, "That's not what I said!"

Why do computer programmers spend so much time in the shower?

The directions clearly state: "Rinse, lather, repeat"

What do you call a blind deer?

No Idea.
(Hopefully you will get it, repeat twice if you have to)

What happens when a duck flies upside down?


It quacks up!

Two ornithologists were listening to a bird call...

...they heard it sing "fourtimesthreetimestwotimesone". It took a pause and then sung "equalstwentyfour". They looked at each other slightly confused, when they heard it repeat the call:"fourtimesthreetimestwotimesone"..."equalstwentyfour". One ornithologist looked at the other and said "I don't think I've ever heard that bird before"; the other one answered, "me either, but I'm pretty sure it's a Fact Oriole".

So Jesus walks into a hotel

he throws a bunch of nails on the counter and asks:" hey, can you put me up for the night?"
(sorry, if repeat)

Why did the blond not come out of the shower?

Because the bottle said to lather, rinse, and repeat.

Not a joke, just a story with a reminder to be careful when telling jokes...

I heard a joke a few weeks ago that went, "What do you do when an epileptic is having a fit in the bath? Throw your washing in."
I decided to repeat the joke in work today to a few of my customers (I work in a pub) and when I finished, o**... got really mad at me. He screamed that I shouldn't tell jokes like that because his brother died in the bath as a kid while having an epileptic fit.
I asked, "Did he drown?"
The guy was furious and said, "No, he choked on a sock!"

The German Coast Guard receives a distress signal from an American ship...

The American captain says "Mayday! Mayday! We're sinking! I repeat, we are sinking!"
The German Coast Guard replies "Oh that's nice, what are you sinking about?"

I repeatedly slapped my girlfriend as hard as I could at the concert last night.

I was clapping for the band.

Kiss

Never Kiss A Police Woman,
She Will Say Stop-Hands Up,
Never Kiss A Nurse She Will Say Next Please,
Kiss A Teacher She Will Say Repeat It 5 Times

Why did the computer programmer get stuck in the shower forever?

Because the instructions on the shampoo bottle said to "1. Lather 2. Rinse 3. Repeat"

Why do 19th century dancers repeat the last word in their sentences?

Because they cancan.

NASA decides to send up an all-female crew for their next shuttle mission...

"Houston, we have a problem."
"What's the problem?"
"Nothing. Nevermind."
"Repeat, what is the nature of the problem?"
"It's fine, whatever."

Double talking women

A husband shows his wife a study which indicates that on the average men use 15,000 words a day, whereas women use 30,000.
The wife thinks about this and then tells her husband that women use twice as many words as men because they have to repeat everything they say.
The husband turns from the paper and says, "What?"

Why didn't the drummer repeat his set?

Because there were no repercussions

Why did the computer scientist die in the shower?

The bottle of shampoo said, "Lather, Rinse, Repeat."

Ever since I became asexual

I've found I have to repeat myself a lot.
...
You're not getting it?
Neither am I.
...
Let me reiterate.

How to lose weight easy

Fantastic exercise that really helps you to lose weight: Turn your head to the left. Good. Turn your head to the right. Very good. Repeat this exercise whenever you are offered any food.

An english boat is sinking near the German coast

The english operator contacts the German control. "This is UK120, We are sinking, I repeat, We are sinking".
The germans respond: "What are you sinking about?"

A blonde hears a guy telling blond jokes...

She says "i'm blond, and that's very insulting." Guy says, "alright, I'll repeat it slowly."

In order to stop all the black lives matter protests

Just play the national anthem on repeat, they will all sit down or kneel.

Most women say...

Most women say their period...hertz, but I say that's just an...o**...-action!
Came up with this on my own today, hope it's not a repeat.

3 Steps to being a good Programmer

1. Avoid recursion
2. Repeat steps 1 and 2.
3. Always have an exit condition.
4. Beware of being off by one.

Even after repeated search attempts, the atom couldn't find its lost electron...

Yet, on the brighter side, it remained positive.

I have two major flaws:

1. I'm very redundant
2. I tend to repeat myself

Pete and Repeat were sitting on a bridge, Pete fell off, who was left?

Repeat
Pete and Repeat were sitting on a bridge, Pete fell off, who was left?
Repeat
Pete and Repeat were sitting on a bridge, Pete fell off, who was left?

I don't repeat gossip

So listen carefully the first time

h**... time.

Hold your right ear with your lett hand and your nose with your right hand, then hold your left ear with your right hand and your nose with your left hand, and repeat and repeat.

I don't like to repeat gossip.

So listen carefully.

Did you hear about the 8-year old dairy farmer?

He had to repeat 3rd grade because he was a slow churner.

Please bring me a glass of water.

Boy: mum, could you please bring me a glass of water.
Mum: get up and get it your self.
Boy: mum, please.
Mum: repeat and I will slap you.
Boy: when you come to slap could you bring a glass of water as well?

i heard you can determine the gender of an ant by throwing it into a pool.

if it sinks; girl ant.
if it floats; boy ant.
(if you repeat it enough times you'll eventually get it)

It's been said that those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it...

But I believe that those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it!

Suppose you are an idiot and suppose you are a Member of Congress ?

But... I repeat myself

Two guys were sitting in a bar, when o**... said to the other:

Two guys were sitting in a bar, when o**... said to the other: "Don't you hate it when they repeat the title in the post?"

Husband: Scientists have found that men say about 10,000 words a day, while women say about 20,000...

Wife (Shouting from the kitchen): "It's because we have to repeat everything twice to you blockheads!"
Husband: "What?"

Recording on an Australian tax help line....

Repeat That, Mate?
If you understand English, press 1. If you do not understand English, press 2.

How to climb stairs in two simple steps.

Step 1
Step 2: Repeat step 1

You know why washing machines are so good at what they do?

Because all they do is rinse and repeat.

You should never say the same thing twice.

I repeat, never.

What do you call a group of zombies in a f**... parlour?

Repeat customers.

Math is just like relationships

It's only functional if the X's don't repeat.

It bothers me more than it should when people put the first line of the joke in the title

It bothers me more than it should when people put the first line of the joke in the title then repeat it in the body of the post.

What did the German say to his friend when he sneezed?

Can you repeat that?

In memory of my father, who died of blood loss because sadly no one could figure out his blood type.

As I stood beside him it was incredibly moving to hear him repeat, over and over, these inspirational last words: "Be positive, son! Be positive!"
Father, I don't know if you can hear me, but if you do, just know I will always remember to be positive.

I walked in last night to find a paramedic crouching over my wife. Get your lips off my wife,

I snapped pulling him off her. But sir, I'm not kissing her! He pleaded. She's stopped breathing.
Do I need to repeat myself?

My Daughter told me this adorkable meta joke today (she's 5).

Her: Daddy, knock knock.
Me: Who's there?
Her: Pete and Repeat are in a boat, Pete jumps out, Who's left?
Me: (sigh) Pete and Repeat are in a boat, Pete jumps out, who's left, who?
Her: Repeat.

"Hello? Zis is ze German Costgärd."

"WE'RE SINKING WE'RE SINKING!!! I REPEAT, WE ARE SINKING!!!"
"Ah, yes! Vat are yu zinking about?

I asked my wife what three things she finds most irritating.

She said, "well, I really dislike Sunday drivers. I'm not particularly keen on loud, abnoixious children. But mostly, I really hate it when I have to repeat myself!"
"Oh, yeah, absolutely!" I replied, "You can say that again."

My waitress today had a black eye..

So I made sure to speak slowly and repeat myself since apparently she doesn't listen

A husband read an article to his wife

about how many words women use a day...30,000 to a man's 15,000.
The wife replied, "The reason has to be because we have to repeat everything to men!"
The husband then turned to his wife and asked, "What?"

We must remember the past, or history will always repeat itself.

We must remember the past, or history will always repeat itself.

A man is resting on his death bed...

As he waits to pass on, he sees the reaper approach his bedside.
"I am the angel of deaf!" Says the reaper.
The man, confused, asks "Don't you mean the angel of death?"
"...Could you repeat that?"

If you don't want to repeat history, you should study it.

If you want to do nothing but repeat history, you should major in it.

The people that believe in infinite lives

Have just taken the philosophy of eat, sleep and repeat way too seriously.

I saw a bumper sticker from a NY Mets fan that said Eat, Mets, Sleep Repeat ...

..I'm not sure as a Yanks fan I could put that on bumpers sticker on my car.

A British ship was sinking.

It was the first day of an employee of the German boat central. After a while he received a emergency call from a British ship.
"We are sinking, i repeat, we are sinking!"
The German replied:
"What are you thinking about?"

German Coast Guard

An English ship was approaching the coast when suddenly they started taking on a lot of water. The captain decided to contact the coast guard for help.

**Captain**: Mayday Mayday, This is the English Pearl, we are sinking.

**German Coast Guard**: Sorry, may you please repeat?

**Captain**: This is the English Pearl and we are sinking.

After a few moments of silence...

**German Coast Guard**: What are you sinking about?

"This cannot be repeated," he said sternly.

"This this this this this," I replied.

Is it okay to repeatedly tap the gas pedal instead of hold it down?

I ask because I didn't want to leave it depressed.

repeat the following to become more than you are now:

I am sofa king we Todd Ed

Repeat after me ..... SAPIOSEXUAL ARE LIARS.

Repeat joke, Repeat after me ..... SAPIOSEXUAL ARE LIARS.

jokes about repeat

Jokes are a form of humor that often involves clever wordplay, puns or unexpected twists in a story. These are usually short narratives or anecdotes crafted with the intent of amusing its audience by ending in an unexpected or humorous punchline. Jokes are a universal form of entertainment that people of all ages like adults, teens, kids and toddlers can enjoy. JokoJokes' FAQ section has answers to questions you may have!

The impact of these repeat jokes can be both social and psychological. They can help to ease tensions, create bonds between people, and even improve overall mental health. The success of a joke often relies on the delivery, timing, and audience. Jokes can be used in various settings, from social gatherings to professional presentations, and are often employed to lighten the mood or enhance a story.