Renderings Jokes
47 renderings jokes and hilarious renderings puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about renderings that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Renderings Short Jokes
Short renderings jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The renderings humour may include short jokes also.
- I don't go on and on about how I can't roller skate But apparently the whole world needs to know about how this w**... in the river can't swim.
- Scientists planned to verify if Schroedingers thought experiment prevails on Mars but sadly Curiosity killed the cat, rendering the experiment futile.
- Why can't siamese twins be trusted to render fair judgments? Because they're always partial.
I'm so sorry. - Was playing with a new animation software but forgot to add any dialogue. It rendered me speechless.
- How would a giant robot that's controlled by multiple people be rendered useless? Make operating it a school group project!
- I was going to make a joke about the render distance of the fog... But you won't be able to process it due to the lack of GiggleBites.
- When your car breaks down, it's rendered inoperable. But when you hit a reindeer, it's reindeered inoperable.
- [For Programmers] Why wouldn't the web site render correctly? Because it was an Edge case.
- Did you hear about the really forgiving guy who was rendered impotent in an accident? There were no hard feelings.
- Why are console players bad at hunting games? Their consoles can't render the models at far away
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Renderings One Liners
Which renderings one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with renderings? I can suggest the ones about and .
- Why did the console player cross the road? To render the buildings on the other side.
- Which knight never won a battle? Sir Render
- What do you call a knight who is afraid to fight Sir Render
- Have you seen PUBG on the Xbox One? Oh, wait... ...It hasn't rendered yet.
- Why did the GeForce G210 cross the road? To render the other side.
- Why was the tallow worker a great judge? He could always render a verdict.
- I couldn't see land at sea... I adjusted my render distance.
- What does the GPU get paid for? Services Rendered.
- I wonder if meat-packing plants charge for services rendered.
- Why can the Tesla cybertruck go faster than a Porsche 911? It renders faster
- So a console gamer walks into a bar... Then it renders
- Why did the console peasant cross the street? To render the building on the other side!
Renderings Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.
What funny jokes about renderings you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make renderings pranks.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Fed up with failure in preventing coyotes from killing his sheep, a rancher brought out his rifle to eliminate the pack. Suddenly, a federal bureaucrat rushed up and breathlessly screamed, "Wait, there's no need to do that. We've developed a new drug that renders them impotent." "I don't know what y`all do in Washington," drawled the rancher taking aim again, "but out here the coyotes eat the sheep."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
MOOMFA!!!
So two male explorers are wandering on a foreign island and are suddenly both rendered unconscious. When they wake up, they find themselves t**... and sitting on the ground in front of some native people of the island.
One of the natives, which appears to be the chieftain, says something in foreign tongue, which the explorers do not understand. A translator appears and asks the explorers a question.
"Death? Or Moomfa?"
To this one of the explorers replied, "Well, I'm pretty sure anything is better than death... Ill take Moomfa!"
Chatter erupts from the entire village with the word, "Moomfa" sprouting everywhere. The explorer is taken over to a log, and is stripped of clothing. To which the ENTIRE village has their way with him. Once done, the natives untie him, and let him walk away shuddering and puking.
The chief then says the same native words, which is then translated again.
"Death? Or Moomfa?!"
"Oh... nononononono! I'll take death!!!"
Chief mutters some new words. Translator says, "Okay, DEATH BY MOOMFA!!!!"
If World War One were a bar fight.
Germany, Austria and Italy are standing together in the middle of a pub when Serbia bumps into Austria and spills Austria's pint. Austria demands Serbia buy it a complete new suit because there are splashes on its trouser leg. Germany expresses its support for Austria's point of view. Britain recommends that everyone calm down a bit. Serbia points out that it can't afford a whole suit, but offers to pay for the cleaning of Austria's trousers. Russia and Serbia look at Austria. Austria asks Serbia who it's looking at. Russia suggests that Austria should leave its little brother alone. Austria inquires as to whose army will assist Russia in compelling it to do so.
Germany appeals to Britain that France has been looking at it, and that this is sufficiently out of order that Britain should not intervene. Britain replies that France can look at who it wants to, that Britain is looking at Germany too, and what is Germany going to do about it? Germany tells Russia to stop looking at Austria, or Germany will render Russia incapable of such action. Britain and France ask Germany whether it's looking at Belgium. Turkey and Germany go off into a corner and whisper. When they come back, Turkey makes a show of not looking at anyone.
Germany rolls up its sleeves, looks at France, and punches Belgium. France and Britain punch Germany. Austria punches Russia. Germany punches Britain and France with one hand and Russia with the other. Russia throws a punch at Germany, but misses and nearly falls over. Japan calls over from the other side of the room that it's on Britain's side, but stays there. Italy surprises everyone by punching Austria. Australia punches Turkey, and gets punched back. There are no hard feelings because Britain made Australia do it. France gets thrown through a plate glass window, but gets back up and carries on fighting. Russia gets thrown through another one, gets knocked out, suffers brain damage, and wakes up with a complete personality change.
Italy throws a punch at Austria and misses, but Austria falls over anyway. Italy raises both fists in the air and runs round the room chanting. America waits till Germany is about to fall over from sustained punching from Britain and France, then walks over and smashes it with a bar stool, then pretends it won the fight all by itself. By now all the chairs are broken and the big mirror over the bar is shattered. Britain, France and America agree that Germany threw the first punch, so the whole thing is Germany's fault . While Germany is still unconscious, they go through its pockets, steal its wallet, and buy drinks for all their friends.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A TV repair man goes on a call to fix a TV.
When he arrives, he notes the make and model of the TV. He walks off to the side and smacks the TV. Instantly the TV starts to work again, the picture is better than ever. He then walks back to the dumbfound customer and hands him a bill for $200. The customer balks at the bill. "$200?! There's no way I'm paying you unless you can justify a $200 bill just for smacking the TV." The the repairman takes back the bill and re-writes it.
Services Rendered:
* Smacking the TV - $0.00
* Knowing where to s**... - $200.00
A Defendant in a Lawsuit . . .
A defendant in a lawsuit involving large sums of money was talking to his lawyer. "If I lose this case, I'll be ruined!"
"It's in the judge's hands now," said the lawyer.
"Would it help if I sent the judge a box of cigars?"
"No! The judge is a stickler on ethical behavior. A stunt like that would prejudice him against you. He might even hold you in contempt of court."
Within the course of time, the judge rendered a decision in favor of the defendant. As the defendant left the courthouse, he said to his lawyer, "Thanks for the tip about the cigars. It really worked!"
Confidently the lawyer responded, "I'm sure we would have lost the case if you'd sent them."
"But I did send them.", replied the man.
"What?" shouted the lawyer.
"I sure did, that's how we won the case... good thing I remembered to enclose the plaintiff's business card."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Microsoft has developed a special version of the Halo 3 rendering engine which can run within LibreOffice Calc spreadsheets...
It's called Halo3.**ods**t
From how high can you drop an egg onto a concrete floor without breaking it?
Higher than you would think, the structural integrity of a well laid concrete floor renders it virtually indestructible towards an incoming egg, even at terminal velocity.
bad IT humor: This new browser I'm using makes all my fonts impossible to read, and my images won't show up....
It renders all my pages useless!
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
The suffix "ize" means to transform, render, or make into...
So doesn't that mean that s**... change doctors are womanizers?
Astrology joke
I've got a cousin who was born with a rare condition that renders him speechless, deaf, blind, immobile, and unable to talk. He mostly lies in bed in a hospital, and we feed him through tubes. But underneath all that, you can totally tell he's got that typical wacky Capricorn sense of humor.
There once was a famous fighter, anointed by the king in ancient france. After his death, all other knights swore to carry on his battle tactics, named after him in his honor, for all wars to come.
His name was Sir Render.
Lesser known Knights of the Round Table
I was the knight no one expected to see on the battlefield. - Sir Prize
I shall see you around. - Sir Cumference
We shall fight on land or sea. - Sir Fenturf
I was the knight who was afraid to fight. - Sir Render
I was the unbelievable knight. - Sir Real
I was the knight that drank too much. - Sir Rhosis
A New Strain Spreading Faster Than COVID
Scientists have discovered a powerful new strain of fact-resistant humans who are threatening the ability of Earth to sustain life, a sobering new study reports.
Scientists warn that a virulent strain of humans are virtually immune to any form of verifiable knowledge, leaving researchers at a loss as to how to combat them.
These humans appear to have all the faculties necessary to receive and process information, and yet, somehow, they have developed defenses that, for all intents and purposes, have rendered those faculties totally inactive."