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Redhead Jokes

130 redhead jokes and hilarious redhead puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about redhead that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Check out this collection of hilarious jokes about redheads, including sunburn jokes, birthday jokes, girl jokes, ginger jokes, woman jokes, brunette jokes, pictures jokes, man jokes, reddish jokes, and Blondie and blond jokes.

Funniest Redhead Short Jokes

Short redhead jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The redhead humour may include short red head jokes also.

  1. A blonde, brunette, and a redhead are all in the 9th Grade. Which one is the sexiest? The blonde, because she's the only one who's 18.
  2. If two redheads have a child, it's ginger-bred. Yeah I reposted this for the 6th time in six years on this sub
  3. A blonde was talking to her redhead friend about her boyfriends dandruff problem... The redhead says "why don't you give him head and shoulders."
    The blonde replies "how do you give shoulders?"
  4. Why don't foot fetishists like redheads? Because they don't have soles.


    ^(My bf told me to put this here.)
  5. 2 blondes, 2 brunettes, and 2 redheads walk into a bar. The 2 blondes say "hello" to the bartender... The 4 Non Blondes say "WHAT'S GOING ON!"
  6. If a woman likes you, you can tell her real hair colour from how it feels. Blondes touch you hard, brunettes touch you fast, redheads touch you... Gingerly
  7. I need help. Whenever I call my redheaded wife "my little mermaid" she always lights up How else can I politely say "your bottom half smells like fish"?
  8. There's a brunette, red-head, and a blonde in the same Kindergarten class. Who has the biggest rack? The blonde. She's 19.
  9. How do you know you've satisfied a redhead? She unlocks the handcuffs.
  10. If a redhead works in a bakery... ...does that make him a gingerbread man?

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Redhead One Liners

Which redhead one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with redhead? I can suggest the ones about red haired and red hair.

  1. What do you call a redheaded gentleman from a long line of redheads? A ginger bred man.
  2. What is it called when two redheads have a kid? Ginger bred
  3. I'm never going to find a soul mate. I really only find redheads attractive.
  4. What do you call a child with redheaded parents? Ginger-bred
  5. What happens when you provoke an angry redhead? Ginger snaps.
  6. How do you make love to a redhead? Gingerly.
  7. What do you call it when a redhead goes nuts? A ginger snap.
  8. North Korea reminds me of a redhead Because they both have no Seoul
  9. Why i love redheads? Because if roof is rusty it's always wet in basement.
  10. What do you call a redhead who works at a bakery? A ginger bread man!
  11. What do you call a bakery owned by a redhead? A Ginger Bread-House
  12. What do you call a redhead with a yeast infection? Gingerbread
  13. What do you call a family of redheads? Gingerbread.
  14. What did the Redhead get diagnosed with at the Dentist? Gingervitus
  15. A Brunette and a Redhead walk into a bar . . . The Blonde, ironically, ducked.

Blonde And Redhead Jokes

Here is a list of funny blonde and redhead jokes and even better blonde and redhead puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • in a kindergarten class, there is a blonde, a brunette and a redhead. which one do you date? the blonde. she's 18.
  • A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are each in their own rooms, who is the hottest? Whoever forgot to turn on the air conditioner.
  • A blonde, brunette, and redhead are all on a building about to jump off. They all jump at the same time. Which one landed last? The blonde because she asked for directions.
  • blonde joke Why are there so many dumb blonde jokes? it gives brunnettes and redheads something to do on friday and saturday nights!
  • Blonde: "What is the second to last letter of the alphabet?"
    Redhead: "Y."
    Blonde: "Because I want to know. Why do you have to question everything?!"
  • [Walks into a bar] A blonde, a brunette and a redhead walk into a bar Bartender looks at them and says : Is this a joke ?
  • A blonde, redhead and a brunette are stuck in a game the game has 100 stairs with jokes written on them. If you laugh, you die
  • Blonde joke Blonde and redhead jumped off the building together. Who landed first on ground first?
    The redhead as the blonde ask for direction half way down.
  • A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette were all lost in the desert.
  • I eat blondes for breakfast, redheads for lunch... and actual food for dinner cause I skipped two meals already.

Redhead And Brunette Jokes

Here is a list of funny redhead and brunette jokes and even better redhead and brunette puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • Three brunettes and a redhead walk in to a bar. A guy at the bar says "Hey, what's going on?"
  • What is the mating call of a blond? I'm so drunk. What is the mating call of a brunette? Is that blonde gone yet? What is ther mating call of a redhead? NEXT!
  • I made six figures last year! A blonde, a brunette, a redhead, a Cherokee, a Latina, and a Spaniard!
  • A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead walk into my bedroom... See ya suckers!
  • A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette walk into a bar... the redhead and brunette duck
Redhead joke, A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette walk into a bar...

Redhead Sunburn Jokes

Here is a list of funny redhead sunburn jokes and even better redhead sunburn puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • A watched p**... never boils but a redhead will sunburn regardless of witnesses
Redhead joke, A watched p**... never boils

Fun-Filled Redhead Jokes to Make You and Your Friends Chuckle & Giggle

What funny jokes about redhead you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean hot blonde jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make redhead pranks.

A blonde, a brunette and a redhead...

Were sitting in the waiting room at the OB-GYN. Each of them were pregnant and having a chat.
"I'm going to have a boy cause I was on top" the brunette said. "Ah well then I'm going to have a girl cause I was on bottom" the redhead replied. The blonde thought for a moment, then started to cry. The other two looked at her concerned and the brunette asked "What's wrong honey?" Then the blonde replied through her sobs "I'm going to have puppies!"

Three women (redhead, blondie and an asian) have just escaped a prison, and the cops are looking for them...

The girls were running trough the city and went into one of those fruit/ vegetables' market to hide, and find 3 bag of potatoes big enough for them to hide inside.
After a while, one cop that is looking for them finds the bags, and realize that they're kind of weird... So he approaches and kicks the first potatoe's bag, with the asian girl inside...
The asian girl, quickly respond the kick with barking noises: ruff ruff
"Oh... These are just a few dogs!", says the cop.
He then approaches to the second potatoe's bag, with the redhead inside, and kicks it as well.
"Meow... Meow", the redhead answers.
"Oh... These are just a few cats!", says the cop.
Finally, he gets close to the third potatoe's bag, with the blondie inside, and kicks it too.
The voice inside the bags respond:
"Potatoes".

What does a redhead with a tooth infection have?

Gingervitis!

A blonde buys a gun.

A young blonde is distraught because she fears her husband is having an affair, so she goes to a gun shop and buys a handgun. The next day she comes home early to find her husband in bed with a beautiful redhead. She pulls the gun from her purse and holds it to her own head. The husband jumps out of bed, begging and pleading with her not to shoot herself. Hysterically the blonde responds to the husband, ''Shut up...you're next!''

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are lost in the wilderness...

...and they become very excited when they come across tracks. As they are following the tracks, the three of them take a guess on what animal could have possibly left them.
"Obviously, it must have been a horse," said the Blonde.
"No no no, we're in the forest, it must have been a deer," said the Brunette.
"You're both idiots. Obviously it's a dog!" said the Redhead.
They debated until the train came and hit them.

Blonde vs. Space

A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette were taking a tour inside of NASA space center. The tour-guide asked them "What planet or other object in our universe would you go to?"
The red head said. "I'd go to Saturn!"
The brunette said, "I'd go to the Moon!"
The blonde said "I'd go to the Sun!"
The tour-guide looked at the blonde. "But if you go the Sun, you'll burn up and die."
The blonde rolled her eyes and replied calmly. "What, do you think I'm s**...? I'd go at night!"

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are stranded on an island

they can see land in the distance, and decide to swim for it.
The redhead goes first, gets 1/4 of the way there, gets tired and swims back.
The brunette manages to swim 1/3 of the way there, but gets tired and swims back.
The blonde is able to swim halfway, but gets tired and returns to the island.

A blonde, a brunette and a redhead spy get caught behind enemy lines...

The enemy puts each of them against a fence to be shot.
The general orders his squad, "Ready. Aim."
The brunette spy is quick on her feet and yells, "TORNADO! TORNADO! TORNADO!"
The entire firing squad goes to the bunker to hide and waits for the tornado to pass. The brunette then unties her b**... and escapes. The redhead spy sees this and comes up with her own plan. The firing squad returns to kill the remaining two spies.
The general orders again, "Ready. Aim."
The redhead spy then shouts, "EARTHQUAKE! EARTHQUAKE! EARTHQUAKE!"
The enemy takes cover from the earthquake. The redhead spy then unties her b**... and escapes. The blonde spy is no dumby she gets an idea of her own. The firing squad returns to kill the last remaining spy.
The general orders once more, "Ready. Aim."
The blonde spy ready to run yells, "FIRE! FIRE! FIRE!"

A Blonde A Brunette and A Redhead trespassed onto a farm

later a farmer came to chase them out so they all went hiding in the barnyard. The redhead hid with the pigs and said "oink" "oink", the brunette hid with the cows and said "moo" moo", and the blonde hid under a potato sack and said "potato" potato"

What do you call a redhead who identifies as the opposite s**...?

Transginger.

A redhead, an brunette, and a blonde are about to be executed by a firing squad.

The redhead is first, so they push her against the wall. The captain says "ready, aim..." and the redhead screams "tornado!" so everyone runs away and she escapes.
The brunette is next, so they push her against the wall. The captain says "ready, aim..." and the brunette screams "earthquake!" so everyone runs away and she escapes.
The blonde is last, so they push her against the wall. The captain says "ready, aim..." and the blonde screams "fire!"

Blonde, Brunette, Redhead

A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are trapped on an island 1000 kilometers from shore, and the only way to get back is to swim.
The brunette goes 200 kilometers, gets tired, and drowns.
The redhead goes 650 kilometers, gets tired, and also drowns.
Then the blonde gets to 999 kilometers, gets tired, turns around and swims back.

Still the best blonde joke to date..

A brunette, a redhead, and a blond escape a burning building by
climbing to the roof. The firemen are on the street below,
holding a blanket for them to jump into.
The firemen yell to the brunette, "Jump! Jump! It's your only
chance to survive!"
The brunette jumps and SWISH! The firemen y**... the blanket
away. The brunette slams into the sidewalk like a tomato.
"C'mon! Jump! You gotta jump!' say the firemen to the redhead.
"Oh no! You're gonna pull the blanket away!" says the redhead.
"No! It's brunettes we can't stand! We're OK with redheads!"
"OK" says the redhead, and she jumps. SWISH! The firemen y**... the
blanket away, and the lady is flattened on the pavement like a pancake.
Only the blonde remains on top of the building. Again, the
firemen yell "Jump! You have to jump!"
"No way! You're just gonna pull the blanket away!" yelled the blonde.
"No! Really! You have to jump! We won't pull the blanket away!"
"Look," the blonde says, "nothing you say is gonna convince me
that you're not gonna pull the blanket away! So what I want you
to do is put the blanket down, and back away from it..."

Buying drinks at a bar

A blonde, a brunette and a redhead went into a bar and ordered their drinks from the bartender.
Brunette: "I'll have a B and C."
Bartender:"What is a B and C?".
Brunette: "Bourbon and Coke."
Redhead: "And, I'll have a G and T."
Bartender: "What's a G and T?"
Redhead: "Gin and tonic."
Blonde: "I'll have a 15."
Bartender: "What's a 15?"
Blonde: "7 and 7"

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are driving through the desert...

When their car breaks down. Stranded in the middle of nowhere, they have no choice but to walk the road to safety. They each agree to carry something. The brunette brings a jug of water in case they get thirsty.
The redhead brings a blanket in case they need to camp for the night. The blonde brings the car door. The others ask why.
She says, "If we get hot, we can just roll the window down!"

A brunette and redhead and a blonde are at the OBGYN

The brunette says she knows she is going to have a boy because her husband was on top. The redhead says she is is going to have a girl, because she was on top. The blonde says: "Oh my God. I'm going to have puppies!"

A blonde, a brunette, and a red head are running from the police....

.... they run into a barn to hide. The brunette hides behind a stall of cows, the redhead hides in the goat pen, and the blonde hides behind bags full of potatoes. The police come in and shine their flashlights on the cows. The brunette says "MOO!" and the police shine their lights on the goats. The redhead says "BAHH!", so the police move on to the potatoes. They shine their lights on them and the blonde says "POTATOES!!!"

How does a redhead shave his p**...?

Gingerly

The brunette, the redhead, and the blonde.

One day a brunette, a redhead, and a blonde were set to be executed. They lined the three woman up in front of a firing squad. First, they brought the brunette up. Ready, aim. But just before they shoot she shouts "Earthquake!" and in the commotion she escapes. Once the chaos dies down they bring up the redhead. Ready, aim."Tornado!" and she escapes. Then they bring the blonde up. By that time the blonde has caught on. Ready aim, and she shouts "Fire"!

Magical Mirror

In a fancy Paris restaurant, there is a magical wish-granting mirror. But it only grants wishes if you tell the truth — if you lie, you disappear.
One day, a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead enter the restaurant and decide to try out the mirror. The brunette goes first. I think I'm the smartest woman on earth. p**...! She disappears.
The redhead goes up to try. I think I'm the prettiest woman on earth. p**...! She disappears.
The blonde goes up. I think– p**...!"

so many poor jokes, where to begin?

A brunette, a blonde and a redhead, all heavily pregnant, are waiting for a scan; the brunette says 'I was on top, so I'm going to have a bay', the redhead responds with 'I was on the bottom, so I'm going to have a girl', at which point the blonde bursts into tears. The other two manage to calm her down, and ask what is wrong? 'I'm going to have puppies!'

A blonde, a redhead and a brunette stranded on an island...

There was a blonde, a redhead, and a brunette. They were all trapped on an island and the nearest shore was 50 miles away. The redhead swam trying to make it to the other shore she swam 15 miles, drowned, and died. The brunette swam 25 miles, drowned, and died. The blonde swam 25 miles, got tired, and swam back.

A blonde, a brunette and a redhead lost in the desert...

A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette were all lost in the desert. They found a lamp and rubbed it. A genie popped out and granted them each one wish. The redhead wished to be back home. p**...! She was back home. The brunette wished to be at home with her family. p**...! She was back home with her family. The blonde said, "Awwww, I wish my friends were here."

A blonde, brunette, and redhead go to the doctor...

A blonde, brunette, and redhead go to the doctor and find out that they are pregnant so they want to find out the s**... of the baby. The brunette says, well I was on the bottom so I'm having a boy. The redhead says I was on top so I'm having a girl.
The Blonde starts crying and says, well I guess I'm having puppies?!

After robbing a bank, a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead

duck into an alley where they hide in potato sacks. The cops first go to the sack with the brunette in it and kick it. The brunette says, "Meow." They go to the sack with the redhead and kick it. She says, "Woof, woof." Last, they kick the sack with the blonde, and she says, "Po-ta-to."

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead, all pregnant, are in the waiting room for the OB/GYN....

The brunette says "I was on top, so I'm gonna have a boy."
The redhead says "I was on the bottom, so I'm gonna have a girl."
The blonde bursts into tears and says, "I'm gonna have puppies!"

Three ladies.

Three ladies went out to the flee market. A blonde, a redhead and a brunette. They found a magic mirror that told them this "each of you has to say something about herself, if it's true I'll grant you a wish but if it's false I'll kill you ". The ladies agreed, and the redhead said "i have the cutest boyfriend" and the mirror killed her. The brunette said "i have the prettiest car " and the mirror killed her. And the blonde said "wait I'm thinking " and the mirror killed her.
Fin.

So a redhead, brunette, and blonde walk into a bar...

This bar has a magic mirror that consumes anyone who lies
The redhead comes in and says "I think I'm the most beautiful girl in the world" and she gets s**... in
The brunette comes in and says "I think I'm the most beautiful girl in the world" and she gets s**... in
The blonde comes in and says "I think-" and she gets s**... in

Three girls are stuck on an island

They find a lamp and a genie comes out of it. He grants them each one wish. The brunette girl wishes to go home and see her family. *p**...* shes gone. The redhead wishes also go go home to see her family. *p**...* shes gone. The genie comes to the blonde girl and sees that shes crying. He asks "why are you crying?". She responds "I wish my friends were back".

A blond, a brunette, and a redhead are stranded on an island...

To get back to the mainland, they must swim 100 miles.
The redhead swims 70 miles, and drowns.
The brunette swims 90 miles, and drowns.
The blond swims 50 miles, but gets tired, and swims back to the island to rest.

Three women went to see the OB/GYN

The Brunette came out and said, "We had s**... in the m**..., and we're going to have a boy!"
The Redhead came out and said, "We had s**... in the c**... position, and we're having a girl!"
The Blonde started sobbing as she stood to go in. Between sobs, she said, "Oh no! We're having puppies!"

3 blonde girls is at the side of a river

And they're trying to get to the village on the other side
1 blond girl ask god to make her smart,so god turn her into a brunette and she swims across the river
the other girl ask god to make her smarter than the girl that just swam,so god make her into a redhead and she built a raft and paddle across
The last girl ask god to make her smarter than the other two girls,so god make her a man and he uses the bridge

A redhead, a brunette, and a blonde were cruising around in a pickup truck

As they were crossing a bridge, they lost control of the truck and it plunged into the river below. The redhead quickly opened her door and swam to the surface. The brunette's door was stuck, but she was able to roll down the window and also swam to the surface. The blonde unfortunately drowned - she couldn't get the tailgate down.

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are all stuck on an island.

The redhead tries to swim home and makes a quarter of the way there, then drowns. The brunette gets a third of the way there, then drowns. The blonde gets halfway there, then gets tired, turns around and swims back.

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are captured by a witch

The witch tells them, "If you say something about yourself that is true, I will let you go, if not, you will vanish into thin air"
The brunette says, "I think I'm the prettiest"
*p**...!* the brunette disappears.
The redhead says, "I think I'm the smartest"
*p**...!* the redhead disappears.
The blonde says, "I think..." *p**...!*

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are all on their way to heaven

One day, a blonde, brunette, and a redhead were on their way to heaven.
God told them that there were 1,000 stairs to reach heaven, and on every stair he would tell them a joke. If they laughed, or even just smiled, they would not make it into heaven.
The redhead managed to make it to the 45th step before laughing.
The brunette reached 200 and cracked a smile.
The blonde made it all the way to the 999th step and burst out in laughter before God had even told his joke.
"Why are you laughing when I haven't even told my joke yet?" God asked the Blonde.
"I just got the first one!" she answered.

A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are in a maternity ward, waiting to give birth.

The brunette says, "I think I'm having a boy because when we conceived, my husband was on top".
The redhead smiles and says, "in that case, I'm having a girl. I'm always on top!"
At this, the blonde starts crying hysterically. The other two calm her down and ask her what's wrong.
"I'm having puppies!" she sobs

3 women are sitting at a bar..

A brunette, a redhead and a blonde.
The brunette says, "I'm so tight, my husband can only fit 3 fingers in me."
The redhead says, "I'm so tight, *my* husband can only fit 1 finger in me!"
The blonde, meanwhile, slides down her stool.

A blonde, a brunette and a redhead.

A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are travelling in their car when they break down in the desert. They each take one thing from the car to walk back to the nearest town. "I'm taking the sandwich so if we get hungry we can eat it." says the redhead. "Okay, I'll bring some water so if we get thirsty we can drink it." says the brunette. "Awesome!" Exclaims the blonde. "I'll take the car door so if we get hot we can roll down the window!"

A blonde, brunette, and redhead are each pregnant and at the doctor's office...

While sitting in the waiting area, they begin chatting.
The brunette says "I was on the bottom so I'm having a girl!"
The redhead says "I was on top so I'm having a boy!"
The blonde starts crying hysterically.
The brunette and redhead ask her what's wrong.
The blonde says "I'm going to have a puppy!"

A redhead walks into the Dr. Office.....

She sits down on the examining table and tells the Doctor "I think I am going to die. I hurt all over. I touch my arm and it hurts, I my head and it hurts. I touch my abdomen and it hurts."
The doctor looks at her and says, "Let me guess that you are naturally blonde."
"Why yes, How did you guess?"
"Because you have a broken finger."

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are stuck on an island

The redhead tries to swim back to land, gets a quarter of the way there, gets tired, and swims back.
The brunette decides to try, swims a third of the way there, gets tired, and swims back.
Finally the blonde tries, swims half of the way there, gets tired, swims back.

Three Pregnant Ladies

Three Pregnant Ladies are discussing their unborn babies.
The Brunette says "I am having a girl because I was on the bottom when my partner and I conceived"
The Redhead says "I am having a boy as I was on top with my partner"
The Blonde starts crying and the other two ask what is wrong "I am going to be having ten puppies!"

A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette are on a road trip...

Their car stops running in the middle of nowhere and they can all take one thing to the nearby abandoned factory for survival. The redhead takes water in case they get thristy. The brunette takes food in case they get hungry. The blonde takes the car door, in case they get hot she can roll down the window.

A brunette, a redhead, and a blonde visit a magical bridge.

The sign reads "Magical bridge: Jump off the bridge and shout out what you want to land in and so it shall be."
The brunette goes first, she climbs on the rail, jumps off and yells "Pillows!" She lands safe and sound in a pile of pillows.
The redhead jumps next. " Hundred dollar bills!" She yells and lands in a huge pile of money.
The blonde goes last. She climbs up, jumps off and gets scared. She yells "Oh shiiiiiiiit!"

Three women were stranded on an island after a shipwreck

Three women were stranded on an island after a shipwreck, a redhead, brunette and a blonde. The nearest civilization was a 40 mile swim away. The redhead swam 10 miles and drowned. The brunette swam 15 miles and drowned. The blonde swam 20 miles, became exhausted and decided she wouldn't be able to make the rest of the swim; so she swam back.

A brunette and redhead started laughing in the backyard when a blonde joined them.

The blonde said "What's so funny?" The honest brunette said, "Oh it's nothing." The tactful redhead said, "It's kind of an inside joke." The curious blonde said nothing, as she walked toward the back door.

A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette are driving through the desert.

The car breaks down, and they've got no cell reception, so they have to walk to get help. The brunette says "I'll grab the bottled water in case we get thirsty." The redhead says, "I'll grab the snacks in case we get hungry."
The blonde rips the drivers side door off its hinges. "I'll take this door, so if we get hot, I can roll the window down."

A blond and a redhead are talking one afternoon.

Redhead - "So how was your weekend?"
Blond - "Not to good my cat got it's tail cut off by the lawn mower."
Redhead - "That's terrible! What did you do about it?"
Blond - "Well I got the cat and it's tail and took it to Walmart."
Redhead - "Why wouldnt you take the cat to the vet?"
Blond - "Well I heard that Walmart was the larger retailer in the country."
Credit goes to my mother for this one.

A blonde, a brunette and a redhead

...a doctor, a lawyer and an accountant, a Brit, a German and an American, a priest, a rabbi, two camels and a duck walk into a bar.
The bartender looks at them all and says, "What is this? Some kind of joke?"

Police: How'd you kill 30 people?

Redhead: I was over speeding when all of a sudden the brakes failed. I had two options. There was a parade on one side and a couple walking on the other side.
Police: Why didn't you hit the couple?
Redhead: I did, but as soon as I turned the car towards them, they started running towards the parade.

A redhead had her Kia stolen...

...Now the ginger has no Soul

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are running from the cops...

They duck into an abandoned warehouse, each find a an empty sack, and climb into it.
Cops follow and poke the bag with the brunette. The brunette goes woof! The policeman says, Oh, it's just a bag of dogs, and walks on.
They poke the bag with the redhead. The redhead goes meow! The policeman says, Oh, it's just a bag of cats, and walks on.
They poke the bag with the blonde and the blonde goes Potato. Potato.

A blonde and a redhead get on the elevator

The elevator stops on the third floor and a young man gets in.
After he gets off the elevator the blonde looks at the redhead and says "He was kinda cute".
The redhead replies "Yes, but he has dandruff. Someone needs to give him some Head and Shoulders"!
The blonde thinks for a minute and asks "How do you give shoulders?

Blonde Joke

Three pregnant women were having brunch together, discussing pregnancy matter, and the subject of the baby's gender came up.
Brunette: My baby's going to be a boy because when my husband and I conceived, I was on top.
Redhead: My baby is going to be a girl because I was on the bottom.
Blonde (bursting into tears): "My baby's going to be a puppy."

A Blonde, a Brunette and a Redhead are against a wall to be executed by a firing line.

Each is given an opportunity for last words. The Redhead is up first: she points and screams "Tornado!" Everyone freaks out and in the commotion she gets away. The Brunette is second and catches on the the plan: she points and screams "Tsunami," fleeing in the confusion. The Blonde has worked out a similar strategy and, on her turn, yells "FIRE!"

A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are stuck on an island

The brunette decides to try to swim to another island with more people on it. She can only swim 1/8 of the way, so she swims back. The redhead tries the same, but only makes it 1/4 of the way. The blonde makes it halfway, gets tired and swims back.

Ever have s**... with a girl only to realize they're completely insane?

For example, last week I hooked up with this cute red-head . She was smart, s**..., bit of a lisp. Everything seemed normal, but the second we got finished she started going on about how she was the Norse god of thunder.

Blonde suspects her boyfriend of cheating on her, so she goes out and buys a gun.

She goes to his apartment unexpectedly and when she opens the door she finds him in the arms of a redhead.
Well, the blonde is really angry. She opens her purse to take out the gun, and as she does so she is overcome with grief.
She takes the gun and puts it to her head.
The boyfriend yells, "No, honey, don't do it."
The blonde replies, "Shut up, you're next."

Three women are stranded on an island

Three women are stranded on an island. There is a brunette, a redhead and a blonde. The women decide to try to swim to the mainland.
The brunette swims 1/4 of the way then drowns
The redhead swims 1/3 of the way then drowns
The blonde swims 2/3 of the way but gets tired and swims back

A blond, a brunette, and a redhead are stranded on a desert island. One day a bottle washes up and of course there is a genie in it who pops out and grants them one wish each.

The brunette says " that's easy - I wish to go home" and p**... her wish was granted.
The redhead is next and says "I wish I was at home" and p**... her wish is granted.
The genie looks at the blond and she says "I can't decide... I wish my friends were here to help me..."

A blonde, a brunette and a redhead went into a bar and asked the bartender:

Brunette: "I'll have a B and C."
Bartender:"What is a B and C?".
Brunette: "Bourbon and Coke."
Redhead: "And, I'll have a G and T."
Bartender: "What's a G and T?"
Redhead: "Gin and tonic."
Blonde: "I'll have a 15."
Bartender: "What's a 15?"
Blonde: "7 and 7"

2nd amendment

A young blonde discovers her boyfriend is cheating...
She buys a handgun.
The next day she finds him in bed with a redhead. She grabs the gun and holds it to her own head. The husband jumps off the bed and starts pleading with her not to shoot herself.
Hysterically, the blonde responds to the husband: "Shut up, you're next."

Blonde joke

A redhead, a brunette and a blonde are stuck on a desert island.
They know the nearest coast is 50 miles away.
The redhead swims 30 miles but gets tired and drowns.
The brunette swims 45 miles but gets tired and drowns.
The blonde swims 40 miles, gets tired and swims back to the island.

A blonde, redhead and a brunette

A blonde, redhead and a brunette are lost and have found a magic lamp, and rubbed it. A genie appears and grants them 3 wishes in total.
The redhead wished to be back home.
p**..., she was back home.
The brunette wished to be back with her family.
p**..., she was back with her family.
The blonde said: Wow! I wish my friends were here.

A blonde, brunette, and a red-head go to heaven

They meet St. Peter at a staircase with 100 stairs
St. Peter says, "To get to the gates, you need to climb the stairs, but on each stair is a joke or a riddle. If you laugh, you have to start over."
The red-head goes first. She gets to the first step and laughs.
The brunette goes next. She gets to the thirty second step, then laughs.
The blonde goes last. She got to the final step, and laughed.
St. Peter asks, "You were so close. Why did you laugh?"
The blonde replies, "I finally got the joke from the first step."

Three pregnant women: a brunette, a redhead and a blonde are sitting in a bar.

The brunette says, "I know what I'm going to have."
The redhead asked how. She replied, "Well I was on top when I conceived, so I will have a baby boy".
The redhead said, "If the logic is correct then I will have a baby girl because I was at the bottom when I concieved.
The blonde starts crying, orders another shot and starts screaming, "PUPPIES, PUPPIES!".

There was a blonde...

There was a blonde, a redhead, and a brunette. They were all trapped on an island and the nearest shore was 50 miles away. The redhead swam trying to make it to the other shore she swam 15 miles, drowned, and died. The brunette swam 24 miles, drowned, and died. The blonde swam 25 miles, got tired, and swam back.

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead were all sitting in the waiting room waiting to see their OB/GYN.

The brunette turns to the group and says, I'm pregnant and I'm having a boy . The redhead asked her how she knows and the brunette tells her, I was on top when we conceived .
The redhead then says, well in that case I'm going to have a girl because I was on the bottom .
The blonde jumps up and starts screaming, Oh God, I'm going to have puppies!

Redhead joke, A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead were all sitting in the waiting room waiting to see their OB/GYN

jokes about redhead